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WIBU to ask smoker in car park to move?

(208 Posts)
TempusEejit Mon 21-Aug-17 11:20:38

Late last night I had a burst water pipe but the emergency plumber can't get here till late this afternoon. I therefore went to the supermarket this morning to stock up on 2ltr bottles of water so I can wash my hands, flush the loo etc.

As I went back to my car there were two women having a chat by the boot of the car parked next to mine. As I got closer I saw that the woman closest to my car was smoking. By the time I'd opened my boot I realised the wind was blowing the smoke in my direction. As I started to unpack there was no indication that the women would be moving any time soon so I gave them an apologetic smile and said "so sorry, but would you mind standing over there (indicating towards the other side of their car) as I have bad asthma and am very sensitive to cigarette smoke?" plus I don't want my hair to fucking stink

She scowled, looked at her cigarette and said, "What, you can smell this thing?" I said yes I can. She said incredulously, "What, this?" I explained again that I have asthma and smoke can trigger it off, that I had to stand where I was standing to load my car and as I had a lot of heavy bottles it's taking me longer to unpack than usual (they weren't individually bagged up). The woman pointed at my car and growled "you'll be getting more fumes from that, pet" so I replied "maybe, but they don't trigger my asthma." After that the woman scowled again but she and her friend finally moved away whilst muttering under her breath.

I didn't think I was being funny with this woman but the way she reacted to me was like I was the rudest person on earth. If I'd have anticipated she'd stand around to argue I'd have just stood back and waited for them to leave - but then why should two of us have to wait around when one has to (to finish their cigarette) and the other doesn't? Btw I took a puff of my inhaler when I got in the car so all is well but I can still smell the smoke on my hair

Was I being unreasonable in asking the woman to move?

sebumfillaments Mon 21-Aug-17 11:21:38


InfiniteSheldon Mon 21-Aug-17 11:21:48


sebumfillaments Mon 21-Aug-17 11:22:38

She was smoking, outside, perfectly legal, and cannot control the wind! She wasn't dismembering a kitten! OMG!

AragornsManlyStubble Mon 21-Aug-17 11:22:49

I think ywbu. It's not like they were in your car or even standing by your boot.

TheBakeryQueen Mon 21-Aug-17 11:22:51

Maybe a little.

sebumfillaments Mon 21-Aug-17 11:22:53

She was smoking, outside, perfectly legal, and cannot control the wind! She wasn't dismembering a kitten! OMG!

That1950sMum Mon 21-Aug-17 11:23:12

You were being completely unreasonable but I like your drawing.

AragornsManlyStubble Mon 21-Aug-17 11:23:13

Sebum. grin

cardibach Mon 21-Aug-17 11:23:55

Im afraid you were. She's outside, in a public area, and how long can it take anyway to put some bottles of water in the boot? If you had jus got on wit it you would have been fine.
As an aside, wouldn't it be cheaper and easier to ask a neighbour to fill a load of buckets/pans/other receptacles with water to tide you over?

ItWentInMyEye Mon 21-Aug-17 11:24:00

Yep, ywbu.

NotACleverName Mon 21-Aug-17 11:24:10

The diagram is good, but YWBU.

Laura25o6 Mon 21-Aug-17 11:24:13

Well yeah. It's not illegal to smoke out side so if you had an issue what's stopping you from moving away,

NK493efc93X1277dd3d6d4 Mon 21-Aug-17 11:24:30

Yes totally!

GeillisTheWitch Mon 21-Aug-17 11:24:41

You could probably have unpacked your shopping and been on your way in the time it took to stand and argue about it.

IdoHaveAName Mon 21-Aug-17 11:25:00

I'd have told you to do one.

Foreverhopeful22 Mon 21-Aug-17 11:25:04

Omg I thought she was standing next to your boot . She wasn't by your drawing she was standing next to hers

Sorry but yes you are completely unreasonable! And I probably wouldn't of moved !

Gottagetmoving Mon 21-Aug-17 11:25:31

Not unreasonable to ask. Unreasonable to expect they have to comply.
I think most smokers would automatically move away if someone came back to their car next to theirs. You were unlucky to meet someone who isn't considerate

Escapepeas Mon 21-Aug-17 11:25:44

What you should have done was feign an asthma attack while gasping theatrically on your inhaler. Then you should have crawled over to her feet, looked imploringly up at her and begged her to go and stand 150 miles away so you were no longer even aware of her cigarette.

Ledbury Mon 21-Aug-17 11:26:22

Why didn't you just move your car???

NK493efc93X1277dd3d6d4 Mon 21-Aug-17 11:26:54

What if it had been her perfume or hairspray that set you off - would you still have asked her to move?
Perhaps close your boot, move your car and then your trolley to a cleaner & greener spot?

RefuseTheLies Mon 21-Aug-17 11:26:58

YWBU, but I understand why you did it and I wish I had the guts to do the same (and I'm an ex-smoker).

bullyingadvice2017 Mon 21-Aug-17 11:28:00

Wow if your hair stinks from a brief passing smoker, you must have major issues crossing a busy road with lorries and busses on. Ridiculous.

Tigerlovingall Mon 21-Aug-17 11:28:04

Lovely,lovely picture, OP.! grin

Happytobefree17 Mon 21-Aug-17 11:28:19

YABU but excellent diagram

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