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AIBU?

DS wants to change his first name due to teasing

343 replies

mashedpotatoes · 19/08/2017 23:11

My DS has said for a few years that he doesn't like his first name but for the last year he has been getting teased at school because it rhymes with something insulting and he reacts aggressively when this happens.
Over the summer holidays he has chosen two names which he says he prefers rather than his real name. One day he says he prefers one name and the next day it's the other name.
I would be completely happy for him to change if he wants to, but what concerns me is the reaction of everyone else. To start with, I don't think DH is 100% convinced. As a new school year is approaching I think September would be a good time to do it, but I'm not sure how to go about it and if his school friends will accept it.
Does anyone have any advice?

OP posts:
stormytherabbit · 19/08/2017 23:12

Depends what awful name youve saddled him with.

pilates · 19/08/2017 23:12

How old is he? What is the name?

gunsandbanjos · 19/08/2017 23:12

How old is he? And how bad is his name?

Underthemoonlight · 19/08/2017 23:13

What is the name?

Curve · 19/08/2017 23:14

Has he got a middle name that he can use? I know a few people who go by their middle name m.

FacelikeaBagofHammers · 19/08/2017 23:14

If the kids at school have decided that your son is going to be the butt of their teasing, then changing his name won't change that unfortunately. They will likely just find another thing to tease him over.

How old is your son?

Alittlepotofrosie · 19/08/2017 23:15

I think he will have to pick one of the other and maybe you could use that name for the rest of the holidays to make sure he is sure?

QueenofallIsee · 19/08/2017 23:15

How old is your son? I think that really does matter. Is there a nickname associated with his name that he could use? What on earth did you call him that he gets teased, in this modern world of Peaches/Pixies/Peregrines/Tinkerbelles what on earth could be worthy of piss take? #nosey

NotTheCoolMum · 19/08/2017 23:16

Please help DS deal with the teasing. I agree with pp they will just find something else to bully him about. Bullies are bullies, they pick on anyone who gives them the reaction they are looking for.

If DS can practise some responses with you he might feel more confident. "So?" repeated ad infinitum is a good starting point.

DermotOLogical · 19/08/2017 23:17

How old and what's the name?

Thewolfsjustapuppy · 19/08/2017 23:17

A friend of mine changed their name aged about 11. It went really well, there was some adjustments to be made but everyone accepted it without question.

RaininSummer · 19/08/2017 23:22

Poor lad. Could try the new name for suze at home first. I feel we need to know the name .. is the us Matt aka pratt or Rick aka Prick/Dick?

Nanny0gg · 19/08/2017 23:22

I know it's a bit late, but didn't you realise what you were saddling him with when you named him?

mashedpotatoes · 19/08/2017 23:23

Sorry, I should have given his age. He is 9 yrs 8 months old. His first name is Owen (my husband's choice!). We are in France and it might be hard for English people to understand, but when someone says "C'est Owen" it sounds the same as "C-O-N" spelt alphabetically. "Con" means 'idiot" in French.

OP posts:
ToeKneeChestNut · 19/08/2017 23:24

What's the name? Is there a shortened version of it that he could use?
How old is he?

MrsOverTheRoad · 19/08/2017 23:24

Everyone's going to pile in and insist the OP MUST tell the name when of course she doesn't.

OP....if he changes it then he's giving in to bullies....but if it's making him unhappy, then it could also be seen as taking hold of his own destiny.

I say let him change it but explain that it's a serious thing and you can't change again until he's 18...so what he chooses had better not rhyme with ANYTHING else.

The fact is that even if he chooses a very plain name, cruel things can be made up about ANY name.

ToeKneeChestNut · 19/08/2017 23:25

Will you always be in France?

mashedpotatoes · 19/08/2017 23:25

And we're not leaving France any time soon. My husband's French.

OP posts:
Graphista · 19/08/2017 23:25

Have you spoken to the school about this? If he's going to be at the same school it's not going to make a difference as these bullies already know his name and have already decided he's a target

ferriswheel · 19/08/2017 23:25

I taught overseas. I had a jbum, Abra, die, con-he, ping pang.

Sorry but he needs to cope and get over it.

gillybeanz · 19/08/2017 23:26

I agree it's a bit late now, but this should be a sticky to all those stupid name suggestions on here, sometimes you know the kid is in for a good ribbing, from the suggestions.

However, the OP ds name might be quite sensible but unfortunate for some other reason.

happypoobum · 19/08/2017 23:26

Does he have a middle name he likes?

My DS wanted to use a different diminutive of his name between school years (Think Robbie instead of Bobby) and we simply told the teacher - all sorted.

sweetbitter · 19/08/2017 23:28

I don't get how it sounds like "con", even if you say "c'est Owen". The c in c'est is pronounced like an s.

lljkk · 19/08/2017 23:29

He has to live with it, he should be allowed to be called what he likes.

iniquity · 19/08/2017 23:30

Owen is a nice name and nothing like con, I'm really surprised he is being teased about it. I think it maybe better to address the teasing with the teacher.

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