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to be annoyed with this topless lady?

(582 Posts)
user3785022135267845922 Fri 18-Aug-17 13:09:35

... we r on holiday in a family resort in sunny country. There is a lady who keeps ending up on the sun loungers opposite us, who seems to enjoy lying topless by the pool everyday. She has a DS who looks about 15, and a DD who looks about 5.

I think it's really inappropriate to sunbathe topless on a family resort in full view of everyone and right by the toddler pool, and with her own DS around. Am I being unreasonable in feeling uncomfortable and wishing she'd cover up?? smile

user3785022135267845922 Fri 18-Aug-17 13:18:58

Honest question - not trying to antogonise, just realising I'm more prudish than I thought! ... to all those that think it's fine - would you sunbathe topless with you teenage DS around? (If you do, that's cool, just trying to work out why I think it's wierd and why I am feeling uncomfortable with it compared to everyone else!)

Racmactac Fri 18-Aug-17 13:19:00

Oh fgs. It's a pair of tits. What is there to be offended about.
Don't look if you don't like

LoniceraJaponica Fri 18-Aug-17 13:19:05

Changing tack slightly, but on the last few "hot" holidays I have been on no-one went topless. I have been to Italy, Crete and Croatia BTW.

NicolasFlamel Fri 18-Aug-17 13:19:10

Manly bits I assume to mean penis? All the woman have their womanly bits covered then yes? No labia randomly waving around at you? Then you're good. Relax.

UnicornMadeOfPinkGlitter Fri 18-Aug-17 13:20:12

User I do agree. Although admittedly I might be a bit of a prude. However yes I do think it's a little bit inappropriate to sunbathe topless in a family resort.

I could also be jealous as mine aren't perky little boobs but if I took my bikini off I'd have weird tan lines as mu boobs would be down to to my belly button. blush

MeltorPeltor Fri 18-Aug-17 13:20:26

OH HOLY MOTHER OF GOD.

Has she got nipples?

COVER YOUR EYES, don't stare directly at them, it can cause blindness and insanity. Uncovered nipples are VERY dangerous, will no one think of the children? I hope you are packing and on the first flight home away from this vicious woman and her uncovered nips.

Donttouchthethings Fri 18-Aug-17 13:20:30

They're just boobs. Does kids good to normalise them.

CherriesInTheSnow Fri 18-Aug-17 13:20:57

Poor woman, how much have you been staring at her to know how frequently she bathes top less? You know it's perfectly legal and normal in many places?

Agree with the poster who said you need to have a look at yourself about why you're so uncomfortable. I know breasts and female bodies are hugely sexualised and TBH I might look at someone once if they were in the minority (I. e. the only person doing) but it would be more like a "wow, good for you" kind of thing.

I could not and would not allow myself to be angry at another woman for sunbathing toplessly on her holiday that she has presumably paid for and been looking forward to all year.

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman Fri 18-Aug-17 13:21:24

would you sunbathe topless with you teenage DS around? Yes, I would but then I think a naked body is nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about.

Sunshinegirls Fri 18-Aug-17 13:21:28

There was a time when I would have been a bit shy I suppose at showing my baps, but now that I'm a bit older, have breastfed 2 kids etc, I don't think about them anymore and would definitely give them an airing out on a sunny holiday.

SisterhoodisPowerful Fri 18-Aug-17 13:21:31

Men have breast tissue and nipples. They also get breast cancer. Breasts aren't uniquely female. The social construction of breasts is inherently misogynistic and designed to control women's behaviour.

kittybiscuits Fri 18-Aug-17 13:22:58

Tell your husband to get his wanger out so she has some company then?

EdmundCleverClogs Fri 18-Aug-17 13:23:50

As others have said, men and women both have 'boobs', or more precisely, nipples and breast tissue. It's not part of the female genitalia.

How would a 15 year old feel about it? It depends what kind of family they are, some don't worry about seeing each other's bodies. There's nothing sexual to it, and quite frankly I can't see why de-sensitising the image of bare breasts is a bad thing.

CherriesInTheSnow Fri 18-Aug-17 13:23:52

And its weird to ask about a mothers breasts being invisible in front of her own son confused I have 2 older brothers, we saw our mum naked all the bloody time, and she has a very generous bosom! Maybe it wouldn't even cross her mind to be self conscious or worry about any weirdness given that the child is her son??

user3785022135267845922 Fri 18-Aug-17 13:24:34

Ok ok, I'm in the dark ages then! I will try and get with the 21st century! (I'll not be getting mine out though! That would scare everyone away!!!!)

MerryMarigold Fri 18-Aug-17 13:25:21

I expect all you 'man have boobs too' don't wear bras?! Do gardening topless? Etc.

OP, I am with you on the boobs. My sons have seen mine plenty, doesn't stop them looking at others. What do you think page 3 is all about then? Men titillating themselves (yes, that's deliberate) over....you guess it...boobs! Enough feminists all over that one.

I went to Turkey this year and there were no bare boobs. Funnily enough DD is not bothered at looking at fat men's 'boobs'.

NancyDonahue Fri 18-Aug-17 13:25:30

It doesn't bother me but I wouldn't get mine out.

It reminds me of the time we were on the beach in menorca. We'd been chatting to a family who were staying in our hotel for a few days. Their dc's the same age as ours played together. We sat together on the beach one afternoon and the mum whipped her bikini top off mid conversation.

Dh didn't know where to look shock
Dd stared grin
I was envious at her perkiness envy

Mrscropley Fri 18-Aug-17 13:27:19

I would be uncomfortable trying to muffle my ds8 from laughing and my dh from staring but wouldn't bother me personally. Prob be envious if hers are suitable for public exposure tbh.

EezerGoode Fri 18-Aug-17 13:28:13

Well i wouldn't like it ,not one bit.....but only because hers are probably better than mine.and if she's got them out she must be happy with her body,so I'd be well jel...🙄

CherriesInTheSnow Fri 18-Aug-17 13:28:13

grin for what its worth I won't be getting mine out for anyone either, mine are just a bit too erogenous to me to have them wobbling about for all to see, I do liken them to my vagina and feel they are too intimate to be on full display.

But that's my personal relationship with my own breasts and not a reflection on how I expect or think other women should feel about their own bodies smile I've never been to a nude beach actually!

bigoldbird Fri 18-Aug-17 13:28:49

I'm with you OP. However, I am a notorious prude😀. I would consider it was me being prudish rather than her being unreasonable though.

Katinkka Fri 18-Aug-17 13:29:17

It's just boobs. Stop looking.

CabernetSauvignyoni Fri 18-Aug-17 13:29:45

I expect all you 'man have boobs too' don't wear bras?! Do gardening topless? Etc.

Well I wear bras because otherwise I get nipple chafage which hurts like hell, and no I don't garden naked because who the hell wants nettle stings and weed scratches on their tits?! Not entirely sure why that's relevant confused

FizzyGreenWater Fri 18-Aug-17 13:29:57

This is fine unless moobs are also banned - I assume not.

Would rather a boob than a moob to be honest

RideOn Fri 18-Aug-17 13:30:50

I would have been more embarrassed when younger. Now I think it is just the same as flashing my upper thigh or lower back - in a swimsuit. Its only sexual if you make it sexual. So my back and thighs in a swimming costume on holiday are not sexual and it is fine with any teenagers (mine or others) being there. If I was wearing a dress with a thigh split and low back it might look sexy! if someone else was wearing it Same with breasts, I think on a sunlounger on holiday it is fine!
Men have breasts too, so do children.

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