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To not mind buying this dress at the sale price?!

(145 Posts)
PhantomBlooper Thu 17-Aug-17 21:02:23

I am getting married next year and I'm on the hunt for my wedding dress.

To cut a long story short, I went solo to try some dresses on today and tried on a dress that is simply stunning. More than that, it fits me like a glove and It's on sale.

Ordering the dress totally new would cost £1600. The one I tried on today would cost £699.

My parents are paying for a large proportion of the wedding, as a gift. I haven't asked them to, but it is welcome. My sister had quite a lavish and expensive affair on them so they are quick to keep reminding me that I don't have to scrimp and save, they are happy to pay. Which is wonderful.

I spoke to my mum about the dress I tried on today and showed her a picture. She agreed it was stunning and we are going back so she can see it on. I mentioned to my mum that the lady in the shop told me that she would keep the dress behind for me so that it didn't sell before I got to show her. All good stuff.

My AIBU is when I told my mum I loved the dress and the price tag she said that she wants me to have a totally new dress, not a sample. To me, it doesn't matter. The sample is beautiful, not damaged and would not really need to be altered in anyway. It may benefit from a dry clean but that's it.

I really don't want to butt heads with her over it, especially when she's being so generous, but to me it seems crazy to pay double for what is essentially the same dress. I'm half tempted to buy the dress myself at the reduced price but I don't want to hurt her feelings.


SandyDenny Thu 17-Aug-17 21:05:14

Sorry to be blunt but your mum is being totally ridiculous.

PandorasXbox Thu 17-Aug-17 21:05:50

Hopefully when she sees you in it she will agree to buy it there and then..

Notknownatthisaddress Thu 17-Aug-17 21:06:54

YANBU. Your mother is.

SilentBob Thu 17-Aug-17 21:07:18

Another blunt answer here- you're mum's being a snob!

But that's by the by...are you going to show us the dress?!

PhantomBlooper Thu 17-Aug-17 21:09:34

I know she is being ridiculous. It feels so wasteful to me, especially as I would buy the dress in exactly the same size. I just don't know how to explain to her that I'm cool with it and It's actually what I prefer.

The dress is immaculate considering and I'm hoping she will see sense but I have a feeling it is more of a psychological thing for her and she pretty much scoffed at me when I explained I'd be happy with the sample!

NeverTwerkNaked Thu 17-Aug-17 21:10:26

Your mother is being very silly!

BreakfastAtSquiffanys Thu 17-Aug-17 21:11:24

You sound very sensible.
Tell your mother you'll spend the £600 you saved on a pair of shoes....

Florence16 Thu 17-Aug-17 21:11:37

She's definitely being silly! My dress was a sample dress, and I adore it even now still. Cost £440 instead of £1500. Takes the silliness out of wedding dress prices 😄

PhantomBlooper Thu 17-Aug-17 21:12:09

I don't know how to post a photo on my stupid Android angry

PovertyJetset Thu 17-Aug-17 21:12:58


Think what that other £700 would buy you- that's half a marquee hire, that's enough for some canapés, it's a band!

Could your mum be persuaded with facts??

whyhastherumgone Thu 17-Aug-17 21:13:23

Your mum is being silly. Maybe she's thinks you're doing it to save money and doesn't realise you actually genuinely love it.

Mine was a sale dress - no regrets. I loved it even more because it was the last one and i got a great deal.

DandelionAndBedrock Thu 17-Aug-17 21:13:59

A friend of a friend who works in fashion told me that the sample is generally better made than the other dresses because it has to a) stand up to being tried on, and b) be good enough to sell the style (if that makes sense - nobody buys a wedding dress in the hope that it will be a bit nicer than the one they tried on!).

YANBU, but maybe you could try that angle? Tell DM that you are getting a better quality dress (disclaimer: this mutual friend may be talking out of their arse!).

toomuchfaster Thu 17-Aug-17 21:14:01

Your DM is being silly. I had a sample dress and no-one was any the wiser, but I saved about £500!

RainbowDashian Thu 17-Aug-17 21:15:05

Yanbu, your mother is being ridiculous.

Excited101 Thu 17-Aug-17 21:15:08

Was going to say the same as Squiffanys or if shoes aren't your thing there's always extra special bouquet, veil, hair accessories etc.

PollyFlint Thu 17-Aug-17 21:15:30

Your mum's being absurd. It's your wedding dress and the important thing is that you are happy with it. You'd be perfectly within your rights to get married in a dress that cost a tenner if it happened to be your dream dress.

Freshprincess Thu 17-Aug-17 21:15:53

Has she seen you in it? She might change her mind when she does.
Even my MIL, who I barely knew at the time, got a bit weepy when she came to a fitting with me and my mum (although the bottle of champagne they'd drunk between them might have been a contributory factor).

PhantomBlooper Thu 17-Aug-17 21:15:57

Ah, I like that angle, Dandelion. I will maybe give that a try!

Attempting to link to the dress...

ButtHoleinOne Thu 17-Aug-17 21:16:16

It is a new dress. confused she's being ridiculous. Maybe ft the money directly from her and use the rest towards shoes? Or tell the shop to hold the rest (if she pays directly) as credit?

Nuttynoo Thu 17-Aug-17 21:16:26

My dad was the same. Tbh if she's buying it's easier just to go with what she wants here.

C0untDucku1a Thu 17-Aug-17 21:17:29

Love that!

PragmaticWench Thu 17-Aug-17 21:17:50

If you're struggling to get her to understand then you could say that whilst you understand, and love, her wanting to give you what she considers to be the best, you wouldn't be happy; for you it's about being sensible with money and that it is important to you.

DandelionAndBedrock Thu 17-Aug-17 21:18:37

Oh it's gorgeous! I'm sure when she sees you in it she will change her mind, and if not...maybe time to do your best bridezilla foot stomping and pouting grin.

flapjackfairy Thu 17-Aug-17 21:19:25

My daughter bought the sample of the dress she loved ( well i paid so technically i bought it ) .
I saved £450 and it needed v little alteration at all. The shop cleaned it etc and it looked like new !
Every little bit helps when paying for such an expensive occasion imo.

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