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AIBU?

to ask what's your biggest regret in life?

413 replies

EagledWingsofRefuge · 16/08/2017 16:09

That and have you regretted more things you didn't do or did do?

I have a difficult decision to make and I'm wondering if I make the wrong choice if it'll turn out to be my biggest regret in life. It just made me wonder, what's everyone else's regrets? And are they over things you regret doing or regret not doing?

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Areyoufree · 16/08/2017 16:11

I regret not going to see Nina Simone when she played a concert in Brighton. I should have got a ticket and gone, but I couldn't find anyone else to go with me. Really wish I'd just gone on my own - huge opportunity missed.

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Areyoufree · 16/08/2017 16:12

Probably doesn't help with your decision though!

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accidentalgrownup · 16/08/2017 16:14

Letting my head rule my heart

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Frogandbear · 16/08/2017 16:14

The only things I regret doing are the things that I haven't done. I always feel like my twenties were wasted, when what I should have been doing was travelling, living in other countries and just generally experiencing life.

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Calliwalli · 16/08/2017 16:14

Not staying in touch with the best friend I ever had. I really miss her, but it's too late now. I often think about how much I would love to still have her in my life.

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Snap8TheCat · 16/08/2017 16:15

Getting fat.

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KarateKitten · 16/08/2017 16:16

Not getting more out of my college experience but everything LD been pretty perfect since then.

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Nicpem1982 · 16/08/2017 16:17

I lived abroad when I was in my early 20s

A college friend sent me a letter declaring his undying love so I upped and came back to the uk

He proposed, I realised I didn't love him and was actually swept up in the whole romantic idea and declined

i panicked literally ran away and got on a bus home and never spoke to him again

I regret leaving my home abroad I don't regret running away

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pepperminttaste · 16/08/2017 16:19

My career path. I didn't do a postgrad course recommended by a lecturer after my undergraduate degree and I ended up going a different direction. Now I'm kind of stuck and what I'd like to have done I now can't. Cryptic but to elaborate would be intensely dull.

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ReinettePompadour · 16/08/2017 16:24

Not buying my own house in an area I liked. I was very stupid and moved in with my partner in a shit house in a shit area. He couldn't sell up because his ex was still named on the deeds (long story involving court). While we sorted it (7 bloody years) I moved in.

He repeatedly said he would sell up and we would move somewhere we liked together. We never did Sad

Ive been here for almost 30 long miserable years. We had children who then went to school and university etc and I stayed at home, spent all my savings and now he's heading to retirement so still doesn't want to move just yet Hmm because he will get a lump sum on retirement he can use towards a flashy car nice house somewhere we both like..........as if I actually believe that now Confused.

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dangermouseisace · 16/08/2017 16:25

Not finishing school (through illness) as it impacted on what I could study afterwards.

Marrying my STBXH. I should have spotted the signs and gone for someone capable of empathy. Likewise forgiving my STBXH for multiple things. Regret being a doormat, basically.

Selling my house, leaving my job and moving away from my friends. I think at a certain time of life you know what you like. And if you like something/somewhere, why change?

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WhooooAmI24601 · 16/08/2017 16:28

I regret not enjoying the DCs when they were tiny. I was in such a rush to do everything that I forgot sometimes how precious it all was. Looking back nothing should have been more important than spending time with them.

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OccasionalNachos · 16/08/2017 16:28

Not travelling. I always wanted to travel but I have never prioritiezed saving/funding it. I am too anxious now to travel (as well as too caught up in life - i don't have the time or the money)

Probably not getting married as well. I had an opportunity to get married in my early 20s & should have gone for it.

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LegoCaltrops · 16/08/2017 16:29

Going to university straight after school because I was academic & it was expected of me. I wish I'd waited & really thought about what I wanted to do with my life. I hate my job, virtually zero career prospects because my face doesn't fit, terrible employer, & it's going to be really, really difficult to retrain now as I have to support DH (F/T student for another 2 years at least) & DD. (Not that it's a particularly good job anyway...) I'm mid 30s & feel I've left it a bit late to retrain, even if I could afford it.

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ovulater · 16/08/2017 16:30

I regret getting

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thenightsky · 16/08/2017 16:31

Not taking better care of my teeth.

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ovulater · 16/08/2017 16:33

Ffs, sorry

I regret getting married. It was the wrong decision and I think I knew it. Now divorced.

Regarding your decision op - you can't know the outcomes of either of the options. So you have to think of the major pros and cons and then just decide. And make your choice and commit to it.

I listened to a podcast on decision making recently and that was the best advice - 1. You're never going to know what happens in the future and 2. Commit to your decision when you make it

Good luck,

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AfunaMbatata · 16/08/2017 16:33

Getting married and having a baby in my early twenties. I wish I had traveled, gone to uni etc

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EssCee · 16/08/2017 16:33

I still think I'm too young (at aged 40) to have 'big regrets', as I don't feel I have enough benefit of hindsight yet....

That said, I recently decided against IVF, for a variety of reasons. It was the final possibility of conceiving a second DC. We had the consultation and had reviewed finances etc, and one of the things that pushed me towards it was the thought of avoiding a big regret.

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AfunaMbatata · 16/08/2017 16:34

Travelled*!

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NetMumsBastards · 16/08/2017 16:35

I regret not sleeping around more. I've only slept with three people, all of whom were long-ish term relationships. I wish I'd fucked around a bit more.

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PollyFlint · 16/08/2017 16:36

Spent two years living with a violently abusive alcoholic in horrendous, squalid accommodation. I've never regretted anything so much in my entire life.

When I look back now I genuinely can't think of a single reason I would ever have had a relationship. I didn't even like him. I know it sounds weird but it is genuinely inexplicable to me.

My other regret is that when I graduated, I took a job in a field that wasn't quite the one I wanted to work in, because I had the right skills and qualifications for it and needed the money. Now I wish that, career-wise, I'd hung around and waited for an opportunity in the industry I really wanted to work in. On the other hand, it was through work that I met my lovely DP 15 years ago, and I wouldn't change that for the world, so in a way my career regrets are eclipsed by how happy I am in my personal life (and I don't hate my job or anything; it's just not my dream career).

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NetMumsBastards · 16/08/2017 16:38

I regret spending the years from 16-19 in a shit relationship with an unattractive boy who irritated the shit out of me and played horrible games with me. I wish I'd binned him early on and enjoyed those years with my friends, slept around and been free. We were basically married and I'll never get those years back Sad

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FelicityMarbles · 16/08/2017 16:38

Having an abortion

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EagledWingsofRefuge · 16/08/2017 16:38

peppermint any chance of going back to do a postgrad degree? I think one of my regrets so far is leaving my postgrad degree - ahh the benefits of hindsight....

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