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AIBU?

DH on holiday

384 replies

Holidayhell1 · 25/07/2017 11:05

NC for this.

We are currently on holiday, all inc. as you tend to do, we've found our 'spot' to sit at each day, next to a pool and under some trees. Nearby are a couple of women, who happen to speak the same language as DH's native language. Both women have been blatantly eyeing DH up (he's very fit and classically good looking). Our DCs have noticed it, they make it very obvious, one in particular goes in the pool the minute DH does.

He told me a couple of days ago he'd joined in a conversation they were having (in the language) the other day as he was getting food. I was irritated and said wtf, you refuse to even be friendly to neighbour's at home. He knew I was annoyed with how openly they were showing their interest.

Last night he stayed at the bar after me and the DCs went back to the room. (About 1030/12) at 0045 he still wasn't back and not responding to texts or calls. Me and a DC trudged up to the bar and there he's sat, happily drinking and chatting to one of the slappers.

He says I'm spoiling the holiday by being upset, and that it was an innocent drink, he wasn't doing anything. I say just because it was just a drink, it will have signalled interest on his part, and it's deeply disrespectful and humiliating to me.

AIBU? Is my reaction OTT? The DCs are furious with him and told him he was 'untrustworthy and cheating'. He's gone off on his own.

Kind advice please 😔😔

OP posts:
Notreallyarsed · 25/07/2017 11:07

I think he's being an arse. Not least because it's a family holiday and he's upset his family by being selfish.

ChickenBhuna · 25/07/2017 11:08

I'm sure these women are not 'slappers'. Please remember that it's him you have the issue with here!

MrsOverTheRoad · 25/07/2017 11:09

YANBU. I wouldn't be happy!

It isn't the same as chatting to people in an innocent way whilst on holiday. He's obviously flattered by their attention!

bettytaghetti · 25/07/2017 11:09

YANBU. How would he like it if you stayed chatting to a man in the bar at that time of night?

DonaldStott · 25/07/2017 11:09

You lost me when you called the other women 'slappers'

It's not their fault if your husband decided to join them.

whateveryousay · 25/07/2017 11:09

I would have an issue with anyone openly coming on to my DH too.

Holidayhell1 · 25/07/2017 11:09

I'm afraid any woman who makes a play for someone else's husband in front of them is a slapper to me. It's not about sexual behaviour, it's about trying to shit on a fellow female.

OP posts:
bettytaghetti · 25/07/2017 11:10

ChickenBhuna they can clearly see that he's there with his wife and family & yet they're still flirting with him.

DonaldStott · 25/07/2017 11:10

I would have an issue with anyone openly coming on to my DH too

He seems to be okay with it.

RhiWrites · 25/07/2017 11:11

Slappers?! Seriously?!

Why are you being so vile? It's a holiday, lots of people do things they wouldn't ordinarily do like chat to strangers.

Hoppinggreen · 25/07/2017 11:11

He's the slapper not these women
Ok, so they aren't behaving well but they owe you no loyalty - your DH on the other hand does and is behaving very badly

emilybrontescorset · 25/07/2017 11:13

Your dh is being unreasonable, he's giving these women the come on.
How do you know what he's saying to them do you speak the language?
He could have told them he's your brother for all you know.
If your dcs have noticed then it's not acceptable.

MandateMandy · 25/07/2017 11:13

Completely disrespectful and to do it in front of your children is unforgivable. He is doing this here because he knows there is absolutely fuck all you can do about it.

Honestly it would be enough for me to end my marriage. Slap a smile on for the kids until you get home then pack his backs and tell him to get lost.

emilybrontescorset · 25/07/2017 11:13

Your dh is being unreasonable, he's giving these women the come on.
How do you know what he's saying to them do you speak the language?
He could have told them he's your brother for all you know.
If your dcs have noticed then it's not acceptable.

Alicia555 · 25/07/2017 11:14

Who flirts with a man whilst his wife and kids are there? Also who has a drink with said flirty woman whilst his wife and kids are there??? Yanbu!!! Next he'll be claiming it's ok in his culture.

Loopytiles · 25/07/2017 11:15

Slappers?

YABU for being sexist and directing your anger at them not your H!

YANBU for being upset and angry about his shitty behaviour.

Hekabe · 25/07/2017 11:16

I don't like the term slapped either. Equally I don't like women who don't respect other people's relationships. And yes, your husband is being a dick, or thinking with one. Ego being flattered. What a teenager.

Bluntness100 · 25/07/2017 11:17

Wow, why are your children involved in this and saying such awful things like he is untrustworthy and cheating. That's the bigger issue. Are they copying you? He had a drink with one. It's hardly cheating.

MagdalenNoName · 25/07/2017 11:17

I imagine it's quite enjoyable for him to speak his first language, from time to time.

Perhaps it would be more appropriate to invite the women to join you all for a chat at a mealtimes, so they can get to know you as a family.

It all sounds a bit too Eastenders to me.

RhubardGin · 25/07/2017 11:18

Why did you get your children involved?

Frog marching them to a bar to find your husband at 1am isn't exactly great parenting.

If they are old enough to call him a cheat I assume they are old enough to be left in a hotel room for 10 minutes?

But I do agree that your DH is being a twat and extremely disrespectful.

Chatting and being friendly is fine, staying up and drinking with woman you know fancy you and giving them an incentive to continue to flirt is not on.

MuffinTip · 25/07/2017 11:19

Do you think it's because he is enjoying speaking his native language? Does he get to speak it often. Maybe it's just the novelty of that

Crispbutty · 25/07/2017 11:20

Are you in Benidorm?Grin

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PinkHeart5911 · 25/07/2017 11:21

If the women are slippers, what does that make the man you married? It sounds like him and his cock are loving the attention, his even encouraging it!

MaximaDeWit · 25/07/2017 11:21

I don't think in one post you can refer to them as "slappers" then as a "fellow female" in your next post. Respect and female solidarity works both ways!

Polichinelle · 25/07/2017 11:22

How old are your children and why are they getting involved in this argument? Your husband is not behaving well but YABU blaming it on the women. He could just say No and move away

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