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To be ashamed of myself?

(97 Posts)
SarahJane123 Sun 09-Jul-17 14:50:07

A few weeks ago at the local swimming pool I was in the unisex shower next to the men's showers and washing my hair. I glimpsed a naked man at he far end of the men's showers and stole a few naughty glances. Is this wrong? He was washing himself and clearly didn't know he could be seen. AIBU to be ashamed that I've thought of little else since? It just doesn't feel right.

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 Sun 09-Jul-17 14:50:56

Would you like it if a man was looking at you naked when you had no idea?

It's wrong.

MeanAger Sun 09-Jul-17 14:52:21

Naked people in public can't really be annoyed if people see them.

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 Sun 09-Jul-17 14:53:25

MeanAger seeing them is one thing. Continually and deliberately glancing at them in order to see them naked is something else.

VladmirsPoutine Sun 09-Jul-17 14:53:48

I don't understand why you think it's wrong. You looked at a person and that was it.

Bluntness100 Sun 09-Jul-17 14:54:43

Huh? How old are you please?

MeanAger Sun 09-Jul-17 14:54:54

Glancing. She glanced. She didn't fucking lick him.

SweetLuck Sun 09-Jul-17 14:57:13

Depends really. Did you start touching yourself?

WorraLiberty Sun 09-Jul-17 14:57:59

What do you mean by 'He clearly didn't know he could be seen'?

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 Sun 09-Jul-17 14:58:02

If a man made this post about a woman it'd be an entirely different response.

sugarandshite Sun 09-Jul-17 14:58:04

Our local pool doesn't allow naked showering in unisex changing rooms.
What he doesn't know can't hurt him, it's not as if you took a photo. I wouldn't worry about it.

MeanAger Sun 09-Jul-17 14:58:52

If a man made this post about a woman it'd be an entirely different response.

Not from me. If you are naked in a public place, expect people to see you.

SmileEachDay Sun 09-Jul-17 14:59:32

Is this post not just another way of you thinking about naked guy some more?

Either that or it's fictional.

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 Sun 09-Jul-17 14:59:38

What he doesn't know can't hurt him

Apply this logic to someone being wanked on while they're sleeping, or raped under the influence of drugs.

It's a slippery slope and that's a ridiculous thing to say.

MeanAger Sun 09-Jul-17 15:00:00

She didn't glare, she didn't touch him, she didn't whistle at him, she didn't take a photo, she didn't draw his or anyone else's attention to the fact she could see him. She did nothing wrong.

MeanAger Sun 09-Jul-17 15:00:53

Did you actually just compare a woman seeing a man in a public place to rape?? shock

EBearhug Sun 09-Jul-17 15:02:02

I would probably mention to the pool managers that better screening is needed.

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 Sun 09-Jul-17 15:02:31

Nope, I did not compare them.

I was deliberately exaggerating in order to prove what a ridiculous statement "what he doesn't know can't hurt him" is.

Pengggwn Sun 09-Jul-17 15:02:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

sugarandshite Sun 09-Jul-17 15:02:47

She wasn't even within touching distance of him.
If he's naked in public, in a unisex shower area, then he should expect his naked body will be seen.
I'm more bothered about why he felt it was ok to shower naked, I'd feel very uncomfortable if there was a naked man in our swimming pool's shower area.

Bluntness100 Sun 09-Jul-17 15:02:59

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

MeanAger Sun 09-Jul-17 15:04:02

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

lmer Sun 09-Jul-17 15:04:06

Flip it- if you found a guy had deliberately be looking after realising he could watch would you be ok with it?

VladmirsPoutine Sun 09-Jul-17 15:04:34

MN can often be ridiculous as evidenced by this thread.

FrencheoGrammaireo Sun 09-Jul-17 15:05:42

But if the men's showers were next to the unisex showers then how did he expect nobody to see him (other than men)? If he minded being seen by women (or men) he simply wouldn't have been naked in a public place.

Men get turned on by women walking down the street fully clothed and take surreptitious (if they're smart) second glances. This man was naked in public. You weren't spying on him through a hole into the men's showers.

You saw someone attractive and looked. That's it.

And I'd say the same if it was a man about a woman (or same sex attraction).

It's a problem if you stared at them or made them uncomfortable or touched yourself. Holding onto an attractive image in your mind for later isn't a crime, neither is how you came across this image.

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