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AIBU?

Being naked with your children - how old is too old....

101 replies

AnotherDime · 04/07/2017 19:31

Quite often we all sleep naked in our house and we are pretty relaxed about talking to each other whilst one is in the bath etc or walking from bathroom to bedroom naked i.e. we're not naked all the time by any means but don't go out of way not to be or never allow the children to see us naked - this is our normal, we're comfortable with our bodies etc. My Ds's 4 and 6, also quite often will sleep in our bed or one of us will lay with them (they have double beds) if they wake in the night etc. Ds's are very aware that privacy etc if with other people and privacy of their own bodies etc. DS1 happened to mention he'd seen mummy naked to one of his teachers today, and though she wasn't overly bothered, she did mention it to me as if I should start to avoid this scenario.... so that is my question really really is 6 too old for my son to see me naked?! AIBU to think its fine?

OP posts:
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EssieTregowan · 04/07/2017 19:34

I've always just gone with their lead. I haven't seen my eldest naked (or vice versa) since he was about ten. My 13yo DD has to be reminded to put clothes on at times and often sits in the bathroom with me.

DS2 is five and couldn't give two shits either way.

None of them have never seen DH naked. I grew up in a naked house, he didn't.

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NotYoda · 04/07/2017 19:34

When they feel uncomfortable. You will see then shutting their doors more and rushing to put clothes n or getting annoyed if you see them partly clothed. When you see that, I'd cover up.

I also always knock before entering rooms, and always have done. You've probably got a few more years to go yet

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TartanDMs · 04/07/2017 19:37

We are quite open about travelling from room to room in underwear, but wouldn't go naked. DS is 17, I wouldn't feel comfortable without knickers and a bra on. DS spends most of his time at home in just boxers.

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NotYoda · 04/07/2017 19:37

.... yes, It was about 10 in my house too

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Bishybarnybee · 04/07/2017 19:38

I'm 55 and I'm definitely too old.

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MrsBadger · 04/07/2017 19:38

We do chat while in bath, walk to bathroom naked etc but we don't sleep naked, and def with the dc (7 & 9). If anything it's become more important dd sees me naked as she approaches puberty and starts asking searching questions / examining my armpit hair etc.

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ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 04/07/2017 19:38

I don't think it was necessary for the teacher to bring this up with you.

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MrsBadger · 04/07/2017 19:39

*def NOT with the dc

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ClopySow · 04/07/2017 19:41

When they start becoming more self concious about their body.

My children were around 9 or 10 ish when they started wanting more privacy in the bathroom, that's when i started covering up.

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EllaHen · 04/07/2017 19:46

I grew up in a naked house and believe it's why I'm happy in my own skin.

My kids are happy to come in and chat to me while I'm not the bath or shower. Oldest is 12 and shows no signs of being uncomfortable.

I hope they grow up without body issues.

Oh, and dh cuts about the house in the nude too.

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EllaHen · 04/07/2017 19:47

in the bath, not not the bath.

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Tazerface · 04/07/2017 19:48

I agree with others - when you or they start to feel uncomfortable, but take your lead from them.

My boys are 8 and 5 and have no problem with it, but if they did, I'd make more of an effort to keep covered.

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Crumbs1 · 04/07/2017 19:49

Our children have always seen us naked and we them. They are still comfortable coming into our bedroom and bathroom as young adults. Siblings are quite comfortable naked around each other too. They've always had a facility to dress or bathe in private but never been too bothered. If they're bothered they can cover up,but we've never made a big deal about modesty - although wouldn't accept snogging and groping on the sofa.

When I had surgery for breast cancer I showed them the scar so they knew it was OK and lifevwas going to be fine. I'm still comfortable with them (and anyone else for that matter) seeing both breasts. I was surprised how many woman have asked to see my scar and we're reassured that the reality was better than their fears. Same with children, I think.

We don't parade around naked but do use the hot tub naked (some join us, some ask for costumes as worried about someone seeing us).

We pop a towel around us if boyfriends/girlfriends/friends are about but most wander from their wing and come up our stairs and climb into bed in the morning for a chat. This includes some friends and boyfriends. We have nightwear on when they are home for that specific reason.

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NotYoda · 04/07/2017 19:51

Crumbs

Am in awe of your Wing Grin


It's nice you are so relaxed. I just don't have it in me

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donajimena · 04/07/2017 19:52

ella I'm perfectly happy in my own skin!
My children wanted to cover up around 7 years old and are horrified if they see me in my underwear!
I've never ever told them to cover up its totally how they feel and I respect that.

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Believeitornot · 04/07/2017 19:52

I used to see my mum wander about naked and I'm very self conscious about my body!

My dcs might see me naked if they come into the bathroom but that's it really. It happens rarely.

Maybe your dd mentioned you being naked in bed or something and that's why she mentioned it?

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sirfredfredgeorge · 04/07/2017 19:52

What did the teacher actually say?

There is no age.

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donajimena · 04/07/2017 19:53

crumbs you have a wing? Grin seriously?

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BrieAndChilli · 04/07/2017 19:53

We don't walk about naked, but we only have one bathroom for the 5 of us so often people have to go to the loo while someone else is in the bath or shower etc.
DS1 is 10 and I do cover up around him, in that I would grab a towel casually so it wouldn't be a big 'oh no I'm naked you must look at me' but I am conscious he is getting older and he likes privacy in the bath room now.
DD age 8 likes privacy from the boys generally so will get changed in her room but will still be in the bath/toilet around them if necessary.
DS2 is 6 and I do cover up around him only because he is obsessed with boobies (always has been since a baby) and if he sees me undressed he shouts boobies and trys to hit them!!

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JenniferYellowHat1980 · 04/07/2017 19:54

The teacher sounds like a jobsworth prude who had no business mentioning this.

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JenniferYellowHat1980 · 04/07/2017 19:55

(I am a teacher)

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ThroughThickAndThin01 · 04/07/2017 19:55

Ds1 is 21 and will come and talk to me when I'm in the bath.. He'll also do the dash from the bathroom to his bedroom with nothing on.

Younger teen dses aren't quite so keen on nakedness.

The answer is, there's no answer imo. Whatever works for your family, be led by your dc.

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Countrygirl38 · 04/07/2017 19:56

I never see my two teens naked but I walk around the house naked. They are used to it to be honest. Naked bodies are nothing to be ashamed off

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Bluntness100 · 04/07/2017 19:57

I agree this isn't about what you are comfortable with, it's what your kids are comfortable with, take your lead from them. It sounds like he is now recognising it so I would stop if I was you. Not a lot of kids past this age want to see their parents naked.

Everyone knew THAT kid at school whose parents who did this. The kids are always embarassed and hate it, the parents never think they are or refuse to accept it.

Don't be those parents.

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Pagwatch · 04/07/2017 19:58

The teacher may be excellent in every other way but over this one issue is being a massive fucking dick.

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