My husband spat at my son

Imaffronted · 2017-06-26 15:39:37

I’m away with work at the moment and have had a very distressed call from my lovely husband who is looking after our kids. My DS (7) is being very difficult and lippy this morning and as he was being told off this morning said my husband was spitting at him. My husband completely lost his rag and then did spit at him. My husband immediately felt terrible and apologised. Since then he’s been feeling really awful all day and told me about it. He’s in floods of tears, really putting himself down and doesn’t know what to do. His relationship with his own (domineering, difficult) father has been troubled and he’s now terrified he’s turning into him. I’ve advised my husband to talk to my son 1:1 when they get home from school (I also have a younger daughter but she wasn’t in the room at the time). I’ve said to tell him what he told me- that he loves him and is really so very sorry. My husband wants to learn how to manage his anger- he doesn’t hit the kids but gets very angry when they are being goady- which is frequent at the moment. I wish I could be at home now but can’t. Feel sick with sadness and worry- of course I feel gutted for my DS too. I love them all. Any constructive advice would be gratefully received- I will show this to DH when I get home. Please understand this is someone who works really, really hard to be a good dad.

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The OP is has contacted us about this thread and is quite distressed. As we're not in the business of making life harder, we're going to remove the thread now.