Bit of background story.
Moved to the UK 5 years ago for DH, we work 90 miles away (see each other Thurs-Sun) and I'm currently 37+2 weeks pg. Due to DH having only 1 week paternity leave and baby expected for July, my parents convinced me to be back to my hot home country to give birth. It's my first pregnancy and I'm scared as hell of hospitals due to childhood experiences, so I have also a planned C-section for the underlying medical reasons. There are 35 degrees outside, my bump is absolutely huge, my legs look like tree trunks, I can barely walk and my hormones are out of control. DH has been flying from the UK and back every weekend since I'm here (left a couple of hours ago, will be back in 9 days for my hospital admissions).
Parents' house where I;m now has several stairs and 6 mezzanine floors, so moving things or even getting to the loo is a nightmare both for me and my mum who has knee problems. Dad does everything for us (with a lot of grumpiness). When DH is here, he does absolutely everything he is asked to, but he tends to be a bit messy (e.g. leaving shoes at the entrance, here not common as no carpets) and not to think autonomously to do something when it's not directly asked to. I normally try to balance his standards with theirs looking after his mess (for me perfectly tolerable btw), but at the moment I can't make it due to my physical condition. I do that on one hand because I found their tidiness expectations excessive, and on the other because besides this he is an absolutely lovely DH and he's going to be the best dad I could have dreamt for DS.
After he took the bus to the airport this afternoon, they started shouting at me and went on for more than two hours because they found mine and his behaviour fully disrespectful, as apparently:
- I don't respect my dad doing things for us as I don't shout at DH
- I don't respect my mum's pain because I'm only concentrated on myself while everybody has been pregnant and it's natural and I'm going to be facilitated by the c-section and my aunt was standing up and ironing the day after the c-section (?) and blah blah blah
- We both apparently don't appreciate the economical sacrifices they have done for us organising our wedding, helping us with the house deposit, buying things for the baby and every time they visit in the UK, while in-laws did nothing but they look like angels as they don't complain (they barely survive with a single minimum pension, while parents have more money, and we NEVER asked explicitly for the contributions they made, they volunteered saying no problem)
I have been crying for the last 2 hours and I'm just thanking God that I'm forced back to the UK mid-August if I want to be within the "maximum 90 days abroad" term that would allow me to apply to UK passport in November, but I really don't know how to stand them until then, thinking also when the baby will be born and I'll be also sleep deprived. I have been out of house at 18, earning my own money at 23, abroad since at 25, just don't find fair to be blackmailed on never asked economical terms and to be treated like this at 35 while heavily pregnant. AIBU?