Back story, DP and I have been together 2 years. I have 2 children aged 10 & 8 from a previous relationship. 6 months into our relationship, DP took on the family business and has spent the last 18 months turning it into a successful career. It was difficult at times, it meant a lot of long days, late nights, weeks working away securing contracts etc. But when the new financial year started, he had made significant profits, enough to be able to take on an employee. He now has the luxury of being able to choose his working days/hours which he fits around my work days so he can do school runs etc.
Last month I was offered the opportunity to do a temp job in a field I've always been interested in, but it's a tricky field to break into without experience. Initially I wasn't going to take it, the hours made it difficult for me to do school runs and as it's Monday to Friday, DP couldn't always be around to help out.
Then the day I had to formally accept, DP said he'd had a think and wanted me to take the job because I'd spent the last 18 months supporting him while he whipped the (failing) family business into shape. He drives me to work in the morn, then drops the kids off at school. If they have a job on, he then joins his employee for the bulk of the work, returning to pick kids up and pick me up from work later. He usually sorts dinner too and has occasionally hung out the washing by the time I'm back. We're both very happy with this agreement, it's only until August and it will massively boost my CV so that once the DCs are in secondary school, I will have better career prospects.
Here is my AIBU. No less than 5 of the women I know/work with/chat to in playground have made comments such as 'oh isn't he good?' 'He's spoiling you, ferrying you and the kids around' 'my husband would never put up with that' 'and they're not even his kids, he must be a saint' 'he does housework too, you must have him well trained'
He's not a fucking saint, he's just a decent person who appreciates that I supported him when his career was taking off, and now he's doing the same for me! AIB spoilt? Or are they stuck in the 70's?!
AIBU?
Would you consider this spoilt?!
KentMum2008 · 14/06/2017 19:18
You aren't spoiled, your just not married to a twat. I get really pissed off when people comment how good my dh is for leaving work 'early' to pick dd up. We are both teachers, I am more senior than him and command a larger wage, we both alternate leaving at 4pm to pick up dd and bring our work home with us to ensure we stay ahead. The amount of comments I get about it not being a 'daddy job' make me want to scream. Especially when, on one occasion, it was followed up with 'mind you, I didn't work when mine were little, I chose to be there for them instead of myself.' 
I'll get off my soap box now.
Patricia not a stealth boast! In fact I don't think it should be classed as a boast at all 
My parents had the same kind of thing going on back in the 80's, as did DP's parents. Both our dads were self employed and although they earned significantly more than our mums, our mums worked regular hours. School runs/holiday Childcare was always the dad's job, it's something we're both used to seeing as the norm. His mum has a lot to do with it too I think, she had 3 sons and a daughter who could all cook, iron and take care of themselves by the age of 18. She didn't have time to fuss over them as teenagers, she taught them how to look after themselves and all 3 brothers have turned into lovely husbands who do their fair share of all household work.
Well trained pisses me off too, I met DP when he was 38 and we started going out when he was 41. He was fully 'trained' by then for sure 
He sounds like a good man which on reading Mumsnet daily seems to be a rare thing now.
I get the same about my dh, he is a decent caring man that would do anything for us and I him but people see it skewed like he's a puppet or I'm controlling and he's a poor soul He couldn't possibly just be a genuinely good person 
These comments have come from my own family btw.
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The arrangement sounds great, you have both obviously given it a lot of thought. Ignore what others think, it's none of their business and they are probably jealous anyway. Good luck with it all! 
Kurri I mentioned this to the mum's in question, that I'd supported him etc. One said 'still, he's good taking all that on' and another said 'isn't that what we all do, support our men so they can work?' My face was . Of my 5 close friends that are married, 4 of them are the main wage earners. I always thought it was the norm these days, but it seems round here (fairly affluent town in Kent) that we're progressive
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