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To be paranoid

(15 Posts)
Apollo12 Sun 11-Jun-17 22:23:57

Recently my partner admitted to emotionally cheating which after having a long talk she told me it'd stop or I'd leave. For a bit everything was good but now she's turning her phone off everytime she's not on it and it has a password. I'm not the type to go through someone's phone I like to have faith in people. Am I just being paranoid or something wrong?

NavyandWhite Sun 11-Jun-17 22:34:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

marymoose Mon 12-Jun-17 19:11:15

If you are questioning this and yourself are you sure you actually trust her? As above did you ask her why she is turning it off? Do you know the password? Not suggesting that you snoop but usually a password is there for a reason, sorry Op

Osugarsugar Mon 12-Jun-17 19:18:27

You are nbu at all my x used to have a password on his phone and when i finally cracked it there was emails and texts from years back he had cheated with 6 different woman that is why he is an ex grin

Axissyrr Mon 12-Jun-17 19:21:27

YANBU to be paranoid, as such. However, YWBU to accuse her of doing anything without actually having proof of her doing it. Try to have a chat with her without coming across as demanding or aggressive, as she'll just fire back with being defensive, and that won't be good for either of you.

Thethumbb Mon 12-Jun-17 19:22:32

If she is turning it off then is she spending more time with you? I cheated on my ex when I was a good few years younger than I am now and I would be attached to my phone and scared if it rang while I was in his company so turning it off to me is a sign that nothing more sinister is happening here
How is your relationship? Do you fully trust her? I say this because usually when the trust is even a tiny bit broken it can be very hard near impossible to gain back

MaidOfStars Mon 12-Jun-17 19:24:57

Turning it off (not an obvious thing to do) or putting it into lock mode by clicking a button (I do this - nothing to hide, just habit)?

ContourQueenHTH Mon 12-Jun-17 19:24:58

Just because she has a password you can no longer to invading her privacy? Your post smacks desperation of needing to check up on her

MaidOfStars Mon 12-Jun-17 19:25:51

Also, some workplaces now demand password/PINs on phones to pop email through to mail apps.

cristalwyne Mon 12-Jun-17 19:33:55

Turning it off is a clear cut sign of cheating in my experience OP

Nandosmum Mon 12-Jun-17 19:40:59

Don't ask her about it now that will look like you have been thinking about it for days ask her about it when you catch her doing it. Bluntness is key here
She could still be emotionally cheating and is trying to get away with it or it could all be innocent

Nicolab3114 Mon 12-Jun-17 19:44:29

Your not being paranoid, she's being shady. You need to see if she is talking to another guy again, and if she is tell her that she needs to make the choice between respecting the boundaries that come with a committed relationship and behaving like a single person who can talk to random guys until the cows come home. The problem is that you really didn't take action when you caught her doing it the first time, and now you have kind of set a bad precedent. Unfortunately there are many people out there who want to be in a relationship but still act like they are single part of the time, they don't understand that its one way or the other and there really is no grey area. And unfortunately your gf sounds like one of those people. If she is doing something shady again I would strongly suggest that you end this relationship

Lostinparadisee Mon 12-Jun-17 19:57:46

Very limited info op
how is your relationship usually? did you fall out over the emotional cheating or was it swept under the rug? i emotionally cheated on my now husband i don't have a reason of why i started it but i managed to stop it before it went further (i booked a hotel to cheat) he left the house (we had 3 young children) and i was distraught and disgusted when i finally realised how i acted it made me want to throw my phone away. do you feel like she is still doing it?

DadofOnedaughter Mon 12-Jun-17 20:23:48

Is it just emotional cheating you are worried about or has she cheated befor?

dadoftwinboys6m Wed 14-Jun-17 15:40:01

How are things Op?

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