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AIBU?

AIBU to be fed up with DH's dithering.

12 replies

Fitzsimmons · 06/06/2017 08:19

My DH is a ditherer. As I am someone who is pretty impulsive this generally works well as we tend to reign in each other's excess, but this has driven me batty.

Our roof sprung a leak last night. Water is coming into the bathroom via the ceiling. DH went into the loft and established that, yes, there was a leak. He knows nothing about DIY, putting up shelves is his limit and even that is a bit of a trauma.

This was about midnight so as it didn't seem like a big leak we decided to wait until the morning to sort it out.

7am this morning I'm ready to start phoning companies since most have a 24 hour call out. However, DH has insisted that he needs to:

Spend 40 minutes googling things and looking at Twitter.

Spend 20 minutes in the bathroom.

Go back into the loft to once again have a look and confirm there is a leak.

Go outside and look at the roof to see if it's anything obvious. I have already done this, there's no tiles missing, but DH needs to look himself.

Confirm by looking at the insurance documents that we are not covered for general wear and tear, even though I have checked.

Ring insurance company just in case.

After all this he will think about phoning a roof company.

AIBU in thinking this is too much dithering? We are going on holiday on Thursday.

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1stTimeMama · 06/06/2017 08:25

Why can't you just call them yourself? But yes, he's making what should be very simple in to a far more complicated ordeal!

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MsHopey · 06/06/2017 08:27

Too much dithering. But some men feel they need to give things a go. I know plenty of men who wouldn't be able to pass me a hammer from a tool box but would still insist on trying to fix things themselves first, which normally results in making it worse rather than better. If you know his capabilities don't stretch to this, it's hard to tell him, but with a deadline and something as serious as a leak I'd have had to let him know.

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CMOTDibbler · 06/06/2017 08:31

Just ring the companies yourself!

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Fitzsimmons · 06/06/2017 08:31

I would be very happy to call, but he has insisted on doing it his way and I don't want an argument.

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NormaSmuff · 06/06/2017 08:34

He is trying to be the Man of the House, a caveman if you like.

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NormaSmuff · 06/06/2017 08:34

well, can he fix it?

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Shoxfordian · 06/06/2017 08:38

Take yourself out for the day then and leave him to it if he's being difficult

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Groupie123 · 06/06/2017 09:46

DH was a ditherer too, but I stopped letting him make any important decisions. He hated that & has changed his ways.

Fuck the argument, call them yourself and if he argues tell him to get his finger out.

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Allthebestnamesareused · 06/06/2017 09:47

Probably a good idea to check whether you have any emergency call out cover on your house insurance first though to be fair; but after that just get on with it!

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e1y1 · 06/06/2017 10:19

Well, it's either an argument or potentially a bigger leak. More damage, more money etc.

Make the call.

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nannybeach · 06/06/2017 10:47

sensible to have a look see what you are dealing with, lets face it there appear to be more roofing contractors arriving on horse back than any other businesses! But asap. I had a friend with a leaky roof, asked what she did, she moved out of the bloody bedroom and slepdownstairs, told her she was mad, the roof might have caved in! she didnt go in the loft, inspect or anything, you would at least stick a bucket underneath,maybe a plastic bin bag over the hole. Having said that, sitting in my conservatory, roof leaked last night, we are actually waiting for conservatory company we have used lots of times before to come and fit new roof, DH tried to patch it, (no money at that point) had a dish underneath it on top of a cupboard, got up this morning to find the dish overflowing.

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PenguinOfDoom · 06/06/2017 10:59

well, can he fix it?

Yes, he can!

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