Sex noise from neighbours at 5am

[AteRiri]

I have recently moved to a new apartment and my neighbours seem to like morning sex, as I often hear their loud sex noises in the morning.

I'm more amused than I mind, but anyone else here have noisy neighbours? How do you react when you bump into them outside the house?

I rarely see them.

[UsaNayme]

My neighbours used to have sex every day at 3am and 8am like clockwork. Every single day of the week. Then another neighbour (they shared a bedroom wall) went over to punch the man's lights out because he was so sleep deprived.

He didn't get to punch him, but it stopped them having sex at 8am

Then another neighbour, who also shared a bedroom wall (it was a shoddy block of flats with an apartment on 3 sides of yours), would slam the wall every time they had sex. So hard I could hear it sometimes and I didn't share a wall with that neighbour.

That stopped them having sex at 3am.

[CondensedMilkSarnies]

I don't get why some people make such a racket during sex . I understand that beds squeak but it's all the ooooih yeeees , harder , faster etc screamed at 10000000000 decibels that bemuses me ! < remembers old next door neighbours>

( maybe I've been doing it wrong).

[UsaNayme]

CondensedMilkSarnies or when they let the headboard slam. Just pull the fucking thing away from the wall

[paxillin]

Re-name your WIFI "IcanHearYouShaggingAt5am".

[UsaNayme]

Actually, another time this happened to me, same shitty block of flats.

Woman below me sang like an opera singer every time she orgasmed. It was always at a reasonable time so I never complained, just put some music on, but it was most days

Then found out that her husband was going round telling all the other neighbours that I had sex too loudly and it bothered him. I hadn't had sex in about a year and they'd moved in 6 months ago, the bastard

[takeabreakthatslife]

My friend had this and played the birdie song at full volume against the every time they started

[Itsnotwhatitseems]

Try this on their door

Dear Neighbour
Last night I believe I could hear you having sex, do you mind being louder? It was hard for me to masterbate while holding a cup to the wall.
Love the guy at number 8

[paxillin]

But you asked about noisy neighbours, OP. I had a neighbour who was retching out who-knows-what at 7am to coincide with my shower. It started as snorting something inwards through his nose chrrrr chrrr chrrr, then about ten non-cough huuuurgh huuurgh huuuuurghs followed by noisy mixing in his mouth before noisy expulsion. I had to move my shower time forward, it was so disturbing.

[LadyB49]

I banged on the wall a few times..
All sorted.

[PyongyangKipperbang]

Torn between "Noisy sex neighbour complaints" articles through the letter box and changing the WIFI name.

Coming down slightly on the side of changing the WIFI as there is a good chance that anyone else who can hear them will see it too, and it will make their day!

I would start with

Wecanhearyoushagging

then

stophavingnoisysexat5am

and finish up with

Giveupmatesheisfakingit

[PyongyangKipperbang]

And sex noise is usually from the woman and ime its because she is trying to convince him she is orgasming so he gets on with it! Maybe I am jaded but usually the louder the orgasm the faker it is!

[TheNaze73]

F

[TheNaze73]

Fair play to them however, I don't think there is the need for the 3am chorus.
Definitely, change your wifi name.

[MsMarvel]

Usanayme, maybe its not the husband that the woman is practicing her opera singing with.... And someone spoke to him about it so the wife blamed you to cover her ass!

[UsaNayme]

MsMarvel No, it was definitely him. He smoked​ so much weed that you could tell when he was in as it seeped through the ceiling

[justkeepswimmingg]

Love threads like this
When we lived in flats several years ago there was a couple who used to fight/argue often. You'd hear plates being thrown, screaming etc and then it would go silent. You'd then hear them having really really loud make up sex. Me and DH found it quite funny tbh. Although I had a hard time looking at them when I said hello, the morning after..

[ForalltheSaints]

Applause could be one tactic.

[Mummamayhem]

3am daily? God, sounds tiring!

[Chewie198686]

Go round and ask to join in

[Farmerswifeupnorth81]

I love a morning rumble . Thank god we have no neighbours haha

[AteRiri]

Of course I'd bump into my neighbour! I couldn't look at him in the eyes lol

[babykite]

I'm a noisy fucker neighbours have never complained so maybe they can't hear me
Or OP are you my NDN

[TheDayIBroke]

I have neighbours that have long, loud sex. Windows open and she can really belt it out! Mind you, they are generally thoughtless, and seem to live as if they are the only people on the street. If you are a screamer, why have the windows open? Utterly inconsiderate people.