Advanced search

To think Facebook 'marking yourself safe' option is overused?

(203 Posts)
iismum Sun 04-Jun-17 10:14:18

Sure, it's fantastic if, for example, you were at the Ariane Grande concert or it you spend a lot of time in the vicinity of London Bridge and there was a real chance you might have got caught up in the terror attacks and people would genuinely worry. But I feel like people obsessively marking themselves safe just because they live within 20 miles of the event when there was practically no chance they were involved just feeds the general hysteria and makes people feel that no one is safe.

To be honest, I was not beside myself worrying if my friend in leafy south-west London who probably crosses London Bridge twice a year was safe. What happened is horrendous, but 6 people died. Practically everyone in London is safe. I feel like people's need to mark themselves safe is increasing the impact of these attacks when we should be trying to do the opposite.

soundsystem Sun 04-Jun-17 10:15:30


hesterton Sun 04-Jun-17 10:18:00

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

millsbynight Sun 04-Jun-17 10:18:37

YANBU. I can't stand idiots on Facebook so I'm not on it anymore.

I had a few texts from non-London friends asking if I was ok but I don't live in a war-zone where my life is constantly in danger.

Caprianna Sun 04-Jun-17 10:19:01

My MIL who lives outside of London and never leaves her house really marked herself safe and lots of people are commenting on FB how worried they were about her🙄

Mrsglitterfairy Sun 04-Jun-17 10:20:14

Sometimes it can be, for example if I marked myself safe now it would be ridiculous as I live in Manchester. However, although I wasn't at the concert, I still marked myself safe. And this is because I have a lot of friends & family that don't come from manchester and therefore don't know how close I live to the arena etc so they would naturally be worried about me

DioneTheDiabolist Sun 04-Jun-17 10:20:15

YABU. People know their own family and friends and whether they are likely to get worried and can use it accordingly. It takes no resources from others when they do.

How is putting people's mind at ease increasing the impact of these attacks?confused

LittleBearPad Sun 04-Jun-17 10:20:50

YANBU. If you live in Borough, there may be a point. Not if you live in Yorkshire (as someone on my FB did today) hmm

AmberStClare Sun 04-Jun-17 10:21:12

I live in leafy South West London and visit Borough and London Bridge infrequently. However i have marked myself as safe as my friends and family do not know that.

In fact elderly relatives think anything within 20 miles of St Paul's is central London.

FrowningFlamingo Sun 04-Jun-17 10:21:13

I think it depends. A very good friend of mine marked herself as safe. I know that she lives in Birmingham. But she did live in London until about a year ago and I saw people asking on her wall if she was ok.
Although you know where your friend lives in relation to the attack, her great aunt Nellie who lives in Scotland might not. I agree it can seem a bit OTT but I don't think it does any harm, really.

PaperdollCartoon Sun 04-Jun-17 10:21:17

Generally I'd agree, but I have a number of friends who live around there or could feasibly be out and about around that area at that time. A couple of weeks ago I walked across that bridge at 8.30om to meet them. Seeing them tagged as safe this morning was useful for me.

PaperdollCartoon Sun 04-Jun-17 10:21:44


Disappointednomore Sun 04-Jun-17 10:21:59

I'm not on FB but find it's only friends who don't live in the UK or live a long way from London who text to see if I'm OK.

HarrietKettleWasHere Sun 04-Jun-17 10:22:18

I think more people should tick 'doesn't apply to me' if they absolutely have to do it. 'Safe' implies they were caught up in it in some way. Although the former doesn't have quite the same right of drama to it so....

I live in London but would expect close friends or family to ask me directly if they thought I was likely to be caught up in anything. Which logically I probably wasn't. Did text to reassure my dad though, he worries about his children in 'the big smoke'.

LadySalmakia Sun 04-Jun-17 10:22:43

I know someone who lives right where it happened - he was on Facebook to say they were inside and OK before they'd even turned the feature on.

It then asked me - I'm 30 miles away but did used to live near there. Didn't use it but then had twenty messages asking if I was OK from old friends that didn't get the "I've moved" message.

So I don't know. I think it's a bit OTT and mawkish but people do get genuinely anxious (and some are overreacting) so it could help them.

And in a very large situation, god forbid, it could be invaluable.

Herestonevergrowingup Sun 04-Jun-17 10:24:30

Yabu. I have a family member in London and I thought it was unlikely he would be in the area but it was in the back of my mind that he could have been on a night out so I was reassured at 8am when I saw he was safe on Facebook.

PaintingOwls Sun 04-Jun-17 10:24:58

YABU hmm

NormaSmuff Sun 04-Jun-17 10:25:08

when i had a look at it it only seemed to suggest my london friends and family. and it also says marked as safe because someone asked after me.

savagehk Sun 04-Jun-17 10:25:22

I live in Manchester (and was nowhere near the concert, having never heard of the singer!) but relatives & friends worldwide still all ask so i understand why (although i didn't)

iismum Sun 04-Jun-17 10:25:25

By increasing the impact I mean spreading the fear, making people feel that this is something that really could affect them and everyone they know rather than something that is fantastically unlikely to directly affect them. The impact of these events is meant to be fear and uncertainty. Marking yourself safe, as someone upthread said, kind of implies you were involved and it's just by good luck that you are now safe, rather than that it was nothing to do with you.

LotusBomb Sun 04-Jun-17 10:26:09

The thing is, even if you do live in "leafy south west london", London Bridge is a busy main station. It's part of a lot of peoples daily routine even if they don't live near by for commuting etc.

I'm a Londoner living abroad at the moment and I really appreciate the mark safe option as it stopped me fretting about all of my friends and family. I felt sick when I woke up to the news this morning sad

I agree that it shouldn't be over used but I think the majority of people choose to use it sensibly.

savagehk Sun 04-Jun-17 10:26:28

Although equally posting anything on Facebook after the time of the incident would imply i was safe, but older relatives don't necessarily get that.

LittleCandle Sun 04-Jun-17 10:27:13

Oddly, I was just thinking this morning what a great feature it is. I have a couple of friends in London that might have been out and about in that area last night and it was great to know that they are safe. The same when something happened in North Carolina earlier this year and my nieces were able to mark themselves and their non-Facebook-using family as safe, which put our minds at rest.

If it annoys you that much, then don't use Facebook.

MrsGotobed Sun 04-Jun-17 10:27:19

I've only seen it used once and that was last night and, IMO it was a sensible use of it ( we live a long way from London and a friend was there with her family over the weekend. Anyone who is on her facebook would have seen they had been to The Shard yesterday so were in the area)

carjacker1985 Sun 04-Jun-17 10:27:29

I don't live in that part of London, but could have been there last night for any number of reasons. I have friends and relatives abroad who have no idea of London or U.K. geography who will have been checking to see if I was okay.

YABVU. What difference does it make to you?

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: