At the risk of completely outing myself, I'd like to ask you for some advice please. It's about a hen weekend that I'm organising in Oxford for 12 people from 9th to 11th June.
(I posted a similar thread about hen do costs a couple of weeks ago).
I'm meant to be organising the hen weekend with two other people. One of those people (Person A) has very important exams coming up until the day before the hen weekend, and they'll of course need to focus on these. They've requested not to be involved in the hen weekend planning because they need to revise for these exams.
Person B is on holiday at the moment. They're currently on a plane to a long-haul destination, and will have patchy WiFi access throughout their holiday. They'll be on holiday until 2 days before the hen weekend.
I'm now in charge of organising, which I'm happy with. I also am job-hunting right now, so I'm not working, which also means that I have more free time than A and B.
However, the problem is that I can't get into contact with A or B very easily at the moment, because one is on holiday and the other is preparing for their exams.
I've emailed and WhatsApped them both with constant updates about the organisation of the hen weekend so far, just to keep them posted and aware of developments, however (understandably), since last week, I haven't had feedback from either of them about the organisation and plans.
Our itinerary is the following:
Friday evening:
Train to Oxford
Taxi transfers from Oxford station to accommodation.
Pizza at accommodation.
Saturday:
Breakfast (included in accommodation price for Saturday and Sunday).
Dance lesson.
Lunch (£25 per person, as we booked from a set menu).
Punting
Taxi transfer from punting place to accommodation, so we can get ready for evening.
Taxi transfer from acccomodation to Oxford city centre for evening.
Dinner in Oxford (booked from £25 set menu of 3 courses)
Bar in Oxford
Taxi transfer from Oxford to accommodation.
Sunday: breakfast at accommodation, and then train home.
The problem, firstly, is that I've sent out emails to the other attendees (not including the bride) requesting part of the payment. The payments are needed as we need to pay for the Saturday morning dance lesson in full when booking it. I sent them an initial email with a payment request on Friday afternoon. A few got back to me saying they'd pay me on the weekend, but I haven't yet received payment from them. I sent out another follow-up payment request email this morning (I was requested to by person B in case people didn't respond to the first payment email). In total, I've only been paid by one person.
The other issue is the timings of activities on the Saturday. I could only get a restaurant reservation for 9pm on Saturday night (after phoning about 15 restaurants). Do you think this is too late? What complicates matters is that one member of our group is vegan, so although the restaurant have said that they can cater for her (they're not a vegan-only restaurant), I'm not sure what she'll be able to eat. Person B also didn't like the restaurant menu.
A further issue (sorry!) is the cost. Oxford is a very expensive city. All of us are paying for the bride's costs (apart from her train ticket to and from Oxford), so we've all decided to pay an extra £20 each. This means that the whole weekend will cost at least £284.50 per person (with taxi transfers and train tickets included, but not including drinks).
Help!
a) Am I being unreasonable to ask people to pay this?
b) How do I get people to pay?
c) Can I pull off organising the hen do?
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143 replies
ComingUpTrumps · 29/05/2017 19:23
OP posts:
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