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AIBU?

To be confused by other people's finances...

314 replies

Haudyerwheesht · 29/05/2017 18:19

I know it's none of my business obviously but still....I want to know!

For example how does my neighbour who only has one adult working in an averagely paid job afford to go to Florida and do Disney / universal etc twice in 6 months?

How does another person I know live in an enormous house and wear designer clothes and have lovely holidays etc when they're 24, with 3 kids and don't work (husband does). I kind of know the answer to this as they're both from wealthy families....but I want to know the ins and outs because I'm nosy!

Why does my friend rent for 1.2k a month and fritter money away when they could ft a mortgage much cheaper if they had a deposit?

How can my sister moan about money when she has no mortgage or housing costs, no council tax and her and her husband both work full time??

Obviously aibu to be so nosey but I'm not the only one am I?

OP posts:
KingJoffreysRestingCuntface · 29/05/2017 18:21

SiL used to be like this. Average job, wild holidays, meals out and designer stuff.

Turns out it was credit cards. About 30Ks worth.

Caught up with her, though.

AlcoholAndIrony · 29/05/2017 18:23

I know what you mean. I often wonder what people spend money on. I may think that more people may have loans etc than they let on.

Having said that, i just try and worry about myself and my own finances while feeling slightly envious that I don't do any of that stuff

ludothedog · 29/05/2017 18:25

I wonder that too. I only just make it through every month and regularly have to cut back on days and nights out. My friends don't understand why I'm always so skint.

It's priorities too, some choose clothes over personal grooming for example whilst others choose cars over holidays.

Two incomes in a household help also.

Trying2bgd · 29/05/2017 18:25

Some people are subsidised by their parents or grandparents
Some people borrow when they shouldn't to fund their lifestyle
Some people don't want the hassle of owning a home
Everyone likes to moan (including me!)

Haudyerwheesht · 29/05/2017 18:25

That's what dh says that people have it on the never never but they can't all do that surely?

The Florida thing really confuses me because almost all of the kid's friends have been at least twice. It's so expensive!

OP posts:
Mehfruittea · 29/05/2017 18:25

Agree - when the sums don't add up, they just don't add up. It's down to either debt, family subsidies, savings subsidies, fraud of some sort or income you don't know about. Unless I've missed something? Hmm

Haudyerwheesht · 29/05/2017 18:26

Oh and I'm sure people wonder about our finances tbh but id happily tell them if they asked! Basically we made money on our previous house through sheer luck and now we need stuff done on the house but don't get it done because of a lack of cash!

OP posts:
smu06set · 29/05/2017 18:27

I know what you mean! I don't use credit cards so don't do extravagant holidays. We don't spend a fortune leasing cars, we buy what we can afford, but that means ours are 10 years old not new. Its still galling though!

IllBeAtTheSpa · 29/05/2017 18:27

Debt usually or inheritance you know nothing about...
Your friend would probably need to make some albeit short time changes to save that deposit and not fritter away her money maybe she doesn't feel like this is what she wants to do and enjoy her income for now...
Your sister does she not have a home of her own with her dh or does he pay all those things? She may contribute to the household in other ways (debts?)
I'm nosey too however look at some of my friends in big houses and the wife's working pt and because I know how they got there I don't question it (think inheritance/large gifts) but to other people they probably wonder why that lady in a low paid part time role drives a range rover...

EastMidsMummy · 29/05/2017 18:27

Inheritance, lottery win, unsecured debt, criminality, prostitution, gifts, a job you don't know about... You'll never know. People's finances are different.

Someone I know lives mortgage-free because his wife survived a cancer scare ten years ago and her life insurance paid out on their mortgage. I wouldn't exactly call that luck, mind...

CigarsofthePharoahs · 29/05/2017 18:28

I suspect a lot of it is either Bank of Mum and Dad or credit cards.
Having said that, the only reason dh and I can afford to live where we do is down to a sizeable inheritance dh received.

CigarsofthePharoahs · 29/05/2017 18:28

I suspect a lot of it is either Bank of Mum and Dad or credit cards.
Having said that, the only reason dh and I can afford to live where we do is down to a sizeable inheritance dh received.

2014newme · 29/05/2017 18:29

You answered your own question surely if they have wealthy parents who pay for holidays etc

SofiaAmes · 29/05/2017 18:33

I started keeping a log of every penny I spent money on in my teens. Over the years I have found that one of the most wasteful things one can spend money on is eating out....whether that's Starbucks or McDonalds or the pub or fancy restaurants.

EastMidsMummy · 29/05/2017 18:36

Yes, enjoying yourself eating out is a terrible waste of money.

gillybeanz · 29/05/2017 18:37

We live frugally and have built up assets over the years.
We have bought several properties throughout our time together and lived in them whilst we have done them up. Each time moving into a better property or area with the increasing value.
We lived off grid for a while to counter act the huge interest on mortgage payments 15% at the beginning.
Have refused to use credit cards, saving for what we need, having very few materialistic wants.
No wealthy parents or bank of mum and dad.
A small inheritance 10 years ago though that enabled us to buy a terrace in NW, so cheap.
Done it all on our own though until our 40's (inheritance) on one low wage.

megletthesecond · 29/05/2017 18:37

I know two families like this. I've decided one is probably inheritance and one must be credit cards.

gillybeanz · 29/05/2017 18:38

Posted too early.
Now with no mortgages we are enjoying ourselves and splash out on things. People could ask how we manage to afford what we do when dh has been the only one working.

SantanicoPandemonium · 29/05/2017 18:40

I know someone who won a little over a million on the lottery, and decided to keep working as the win would have funded a nice enough life until they died or it could pay for amazing holidays and new cars while their salary paid normal living expenses.

EastMidsMummy · 29/05/2017 18:41

Ha! What a weird stealth boast. "We've done everything ourselves until that time someone LEFT US ENOUGH MONEY TO BUY A HOUSE!"

RainbowsAndUnicorn · 29/05/2017 18:44

Parents, benefits (tax credits with three chidren are very generous), credit cards.

FuckingDingDong · 29/05/2017 18:44

Yes, enjoying yourself eating out is a terrible waste of money.
Depends where your priorities are. If eating out is more important than being debt free or fancy holidays

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EssentialHummus · 29/05/2017 18:44

What everyone else said. I remember being in my first professional job where we all earned the same grad scheme salary, no bonus. I took out a mortgage on a Zone 2 flat, and a year later bought a BTL. Another colleague lived an hour's commute away and ate beans on toast, I think because of debts. A third lived at home at went on fab holidays. A fourth bought not long after me with family money. And so on.

Herewegogo · 29/05/2017 18:45

Long term interest free credit cards, that's how I afford Florida. Currently have a 20 month one which I pay a large amount of each month. You can get them up to 36 months though with a good credit rating. Also if you book last minute you can go to Florida for under £1k. And if you go often you can get annual passes.

Also agree with others - lottery, scratch cards, gambling, inheritance. My husband once won £600 on a Grand National bet!

Movingin2017 · 29/05/2017 18:46

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