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AIBU?

Baby name - posting for traffic

25 replies

ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 12:56

Hi everyone! Long time lurker, first time poster.

Myself and DH are expecting DD2 and we have her name sorted. My AIBU is this...

A middle name is going to be my Grandma's grandma's name if that makes sense. DG has recently gotten over breast cancer so this is a surprise for her as I know she'll be made up (mentioned the name for both DDs in the hope we'd like it).

Anyway, I need ideas on how to tell her as we don't just want to say "this is her name" when they meet IFSWIM.

Any ideas will be considered and appreciated thank you!!

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PlayOnWurtz · 28/05/2017 13:01

What's wrong with handing over the baby with a "meet doris"?

MaudeandHarold · 28/05/2017 13:09

Here Gmail,this Elsie Mabel, we know how much you loved granny Mabel, so you think Elsie will have her nose? Summat like that?

ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 13:13

Nothing wrong with that, that's what we'll be doing obviously. Just wanted like a birth announcement type thing to give to her to make it a bit more special, her cancer diagnosis was given and then shortly after we found out we were expecting, so it's been a big motivator for her

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ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 13:17

Thank you Maude! I didn't want it to just be a hand baby over, by the way this is her name situation, so the "maybe she'll have her nose" is a good idea, especially since she's my DM's DM and I have my DF nose which is a long standing joke of the family

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MaudeandHarold · 28/05/2017 13:23

I completely pissed my granny off by not naming DC1 after her but DP and my dead granny. She haughtily reminded me and everyone else for the next 18 months. Sadly she had a horrible old name which no child should ever have.....poor granny

ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 13:38

Maude I have had a similar snipe off my nana... my cousin is pregnant (6 weeks ahead of me) and we have both chosen a name (us first name, them middle name) that was our grandad's mum's name (her ex MIL basically) and she was quite insulted that we have included that name in both girls and not hers

Did you say anything to her to make her stop? I'm not supposed to know about my nana's moanings so can't say anything as she will once again make herself out to be a victim! (Yes she is a narcissist)

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Argeles · 28/05/2017 13:56

You could have your own naming ceremony - it doesn't have to be religious if you're not.

You could make a nice picnic for your Grandma, and anyone else you want to attend and take them to a park or grounds of a stately home etc and tell your grandma just after pouring the drinks. You could do something like bring dried rose petals and ask your Grandma if she'd like to sprinkle them over your DD as she holds her and says her name (whilst you record it/take photos).

You could perhaps host an afternoon tea for your Grandma or take her for one, and you could have a double frame photo of your DD and Grandma's grandma and hand it to her and tell her about the name. You could perhaps buy your Grandma a locket with the 2 photos in instead.

Congratulations on your DD, and all the best for your Grandma's health.

ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 14:17

Argeles those are beautiful ideas, thank you so much!! She knows about the first name as DD2 is her third great granddaughter and all 3 have flower names so I love the idea of the petals!

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SouthWestmom · 28/05/2017 16:02

I don't want to be the voice of reason here op but I think you may be expecting a reaction you won't get.

Second child, middle name?

It's not the same as naming your first born after someone. How excited is your gran going to be really before you invest in rose petals and the like?

ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 16:10

noeuf I know she'll love it and see it as a big gesture, she was just as excited about this DD as she was the first, and recommended this name as a middle name both times. She's not the type of person to suggest her own name as she sees it as very old school herself, whereas my GGgrandma name is coming back around

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Sionella · 28/05/2017 16:12

Weirdly one of the names I liked was Maude, after reading "Elizabeth is Missing". DP didn't even let that idea get off the starting block :(

SouthWestmom · 28/05/2017 16:14

That's good, it would be horrid to go to some trouble and then be disappointed and you sound so excited!

We didn't have to think of anything as dc was in SCBU and my granny saw 'her name' ' oursurname' up in the board when dh took her to see.

ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 16:25

Is that a good book sionella?

noeuf was she happy? Not with baby being in SCBU obviously but the name sake?

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Sionella · 28/05/2017 16:26

It's a brilliant book - well worth a read. Apparently it was her university thesis-equivalent, so v much look forward to seeing what else she writes :)

SouthWestmom · 28/05/2017 16:35

Maude is a lovely name - I read that book too.

Yes, tears were shed but probably because of the SCBU bit. Baby grew up fine btw just a wobble.

Unfortunately dc is a little wotsit and not quite as calm and serene as lovely granny 😄

MaudeandHarold · 28/05/2017 18:00

Archie ....no nothing made her stop moaning..she just popped her clogs Sorry if I sound blunt, but she was a rather spiteful witty pithy old lady, and I was not a grandchild she particularly liked. So DC one had a Hebrew family name, Dead granny's name, dead granny in laws name.... unlike Catholic dad who has 6 forenames. I count myself lucky with two.

ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 18:08

I shall have to find that book sionella! :)

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Sionella · 28/05/2017 18:09

Yes do!

Sorry Op, totally derailed you! Congratulations. It's a lovely idea, however you do it :)

ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 18:10

noeuf I'm glad baby is well!

DD1's middle name is Grace... and she is anything but. The most clumsy child I've ever known. So much for living up to a name haha!

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ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 18:15

Maude if you hadn't said she had passed away I'd swear we would have the same grandparent!!! She sounds awful and like you chose the right names!

A family friend had a lovely blend of her DM/partner DM name as a middle name (think along the lines of Angelina: Angela and Tina) so we tried ours like that... it was a disaster

Have you had more DC? I love hearing backstories about name decisions!

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ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 18:16

Sionella no worries!! Anymore recommendations? Always looking for new material either on kindle or actual book (new book smell MMMMMMM!!!)

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Argeles · 28/05/2017 18:54

Thank you ArchieStar, I hope you have a great, memorable time whatever you do.

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Sionella · 28/05/2017 19:54

oh god, so many!! just finished "the good guy", that was excellent. anything and everything by sarah waters, but esp "the little stranger".

sue monk kidd' "the invention of wings" was unputdownable and i also really enjoyed "the dry grass of august".

"my grandmother sends her regards and apologises" is wonderful; quite unlike anything else you'll ever read

hope one of these does it for you! i find reading an excellent way to think of names actually, because you warm to them when you see them repeated on the page all the time in a way that you don't with a book of baby names :)

ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 20:18

Argeles thank you, we have decided on flower petals of both DD names, with DD2's name on a banner "I am..." style surrounded by the petals, with both DDs either side, then bringing her into the room so she can see it :) it means DD1 having to sit still for more than 30 seconds but she'll love it!!

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ArchieStar · 28/05/2017 20:19

Sionella I shall have a research, thank you so much!!! :)

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