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AIBU to home school DD 5

(18 Posts)
BeeThirtythree Sat 27-May-17 00:06:01

Backstory, applied for primary school choices, due to a 'technical ' error the site would not let me submit forms-called, reapplied, repeatedly contacted LA, it's a long story.
We live opposite a fantastic primary school, it's the one DD felt happiest at when we viewed a few. Going through appeal process as school being offered is 2 bus journeys away...also had primary age children dealing drugs in schoolyard in previous years.

LA have basically said even with the appeal, the school has capped classroom size and 3 children ahead of DD with siblings at the school on waiting list.

What do I do? I have considered home education. DH agrees, as he works from home and gets up early/works late, so he can be there for DC. I would reduce my hours, work as much as can from home so it's both of us.

I know there are other parents who manage to travel greater distances to get their children to school, with other DC in tow. DH does not drive at the moment and I leave much earlier for work.

Just confused and want best for DD. DD will turn 5 very very early September if that makes a difference.

BeeThirtythree Sat 27-May-17 00:08:45

Alternative schools being offered are all either bus journey away/poorly rated.

GeillisTheWitch Sat 27-May-17 00:09:02

If you and DH are working from home surely you would be working, when would you get time to do the actual school work with DD?

Queenofthedrivensnow Sat 27-May-17 00:09:52

I would in your situation stick it out and hone school until she has a place. A friend had this issue. Her child had a place at the school by term 3 of foundation. It paid to wait because it secured the school for her yiunger children

BeeThirtythree Sat 27-May-17 00:15:31

DH gets up a lot earlier then DC wake up in order to work, also works after they are asleep. So he can look after the children now without work interruptions.

Mine would be a short phone call/email at the most. I work with my siblings in a family business so gives me some flexibility.

BeeThirtythree Sat 27-May-17 00:16:18

*than DC

2014newme Sat 27-May-17 00:18:35

If your working how will you look after school? I work from home I couldn't simultaneously educate a child. Even in the holidays mine go to holiday club.

Go on waiting lists at all decent schools even if you have to get the bus to them. Consider fee paying school or a nanny temporarily
Good luck 🍀

Empireoftheclouds Sat 27-May-17 00:19:11

Looking after the DC is not the same as educating them though?

Enidblyton1 Sat 27-May-17 00:30:11

How many children per year in the school opposite? My DD was 4th on the waiting list of our preferred primary school. We ended up sending her to the local private school, but I know that 3rd on the waiting list managed to get into the school after 2 terms. And this is only a 15 per year school. People seem to move around a lot in reception/Y1/Y2 and it might not be that long before you secure a place. Have you tried calling the school office and asking for their opinion about average waiting time?

In the meantime, I wouldn't home educate unless you really feel it's going to be best for you and your DD. I'm not sure it would be - because you're not doing this out of choice.

I would keep her name on the waiting list and ask to be updated every time she gets one place nearer to the top of the list. Then I would send her to the next closest good school where you can get a place.

gluteustothemaximus Sat 27-May-17 00:30:22

I'm self employed. And I home educate.

You can do both, largely because educating at home is very different from school.

DD is mostly self taught anyway. I follow her lead. At 5 it's not that intense grin

Then when you get the school you want, that'll be great. Good luck x

Notenoughtime123 Sat 27-May-17 00:31:25

I'd look up home education groups in your area and pop along and chat to home educators about your set up. Many home educators have to work. It could be a fantastic idea and work really well for your daughter especially if you're able to regularly attend meet ups etc. However if what you really want is to send her to school across the road then waiting list and keeping her in preschool/nursery for a while could work for you. Preschool funding is payable until term after your dds 5th birthday (which is CSA and for summer borns could mean another year of preschool)

BlackeyedSusan Sat 27-May-17 00:31:37

no not unreasonable.

you need to educate in a suitable manner.

you do not need to keep school hours. you can do all your educating at the weekend.

honestly, you can get as much input into a child as a teacher in much shorter time than school hours as you are doing 1 to 1 and school is 1 to 30.

BeeThirtythree Sat 27-May-17 00:41:17

I work with my siblings and my DBro has offered to cover more days. I would initially take a break from work so we can work out a 'timetable' between DH and I, we are hoping to both be present. My brother recently qualified to do what my main role entails so that has made this idea possible. We could hire another worker for hours I am not there.

It is all new and I am researching it as much as I can, have spoken to other parents who home educate and the LA about a 'curriculum' as there is not one set.

DD really did not like fee paying school. I am not being solely dictated to by 4 year old but want to accommodate what she is happy with as much as possible.

BeeThirtythree Sat 27-May-17 00:51:54

30 per class in school opposite. Revisited to speak to HT and she said it would be likely to be a few terms.

DD was ill and off nursery for a month, DH carried on with 'teaching' at home with input from me. The nursery noticed and commented on how much she had achieved...not claiming to be effortless educators but have always tried to challenge DD a bit more as things like reading age etc would have been different to some children starting school as she will be 5 when starts.

KC225 Sat 27-May-17 03:22:50

It's only June. I would hang out for a place. I was in a similar position although a good while ago now but with twins.

Offered a place a nearest school that was in special measures and had the now defunct Kids Company working with it. I could not send my children there. We were 3rd and 4th place for an outstanding faith school but we were not church goers.

All the kids started school and around 20th of September we got the call. One parent was moving and another was driving a distance to the school and decided to go a private school locally. Another moved abroad for work. We got the call for one child buy they decide to make a place for the second.

They missed the first weeks and felt a little out of synch for a couple of weeks but it all worked out. People have said I was lucky but I feel all I did was keep my poker face on.

UnaPalomaBlanca Sat 27-May-17 03:40:30

Sounds like there is a good prospect of your DC getting into your chosen school and you could wait it out. As others have said, depending on which month they were born in, they aren't obliged to start school til term after turning 5 I think.
One thing to check out is how the school's waiting list operates. Could your DC, indeed, go DOWN the waiting list if there are future applications from children who meet higher admission criteria than you? It does happen. E.g. If a child with SEN/EHCP or a looked after child applies they usually get priority.

MrsBennettsNerves Sat 27-May-17 04:13:48

Even the strictest and most formal home edders wouldn't find more than an hour a day necessary at reception age. They're endlessly curious at that age and learn loads just from conversation and life in general. Add in some phonics and basic maths with manipulatives alongside stuff like baking, play dough, plenty of fun outside and conversation with adults, and of course some home ed meets for the social side and you're set.

Do you know MN has a Home Ed board? You would get more experienced and knowledgeable replies there - PP above who have said you cannot work while HEing have obviously assumed HE is the same as school. It's not, it's much much more efficient and flexible. Plenty of HEdders work and educate their children. Admittedly, WFH or being self employed or flexible working hours help but it is perfectly doable if you have good childcare.

shouldwestayorshouldwego Sat 27-May-17 04:20:56

There are two angles here, neither of which are really suited to AIBU. Firstly for the appeal - if they have made a mistake, especially if there is strong documentary evidence then a cap of 30 is irrelevant if she would otherwise have a place. Did the siblings ahead on the list apply on time? You really need to post in the primary education board - put reception appeal in the thread title and there are loads of experts there. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/primary

In terms of home ed again I would post on those boards as they have the experience. In reception they do say an hour a day is enough and if you would spend more than an hour getting her to school then it shouldn't take any more time than that.I think it does depend on the child. One of mine is great at school but was resistant to learning at home, one is really easy to teach and the other one would be fine to teach but would rather just play with toys and would get angry if we tried to structure his day - but he needs routine otherwise he gets bored and angry. Only you know where your child falls in that spectrum. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/home_ed

Good luck

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