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AIBU?

AIBU to feel like giving up on the UK

171 replies

Fairysnuff321 · 26/05/2017 09:36

My OH is EU born, but has been living here with me and working , paying tax (go those who read the Daily Mail this may shock you)for 20 yrs. He has started his own business and is well respected in his industry. I've always worked in advocacy/counselling/support jobs, I am struggling to get back into work despite years of experience and training because of the lack of funding for these services.
I feel like accepting we have to leave the UK for the sake of our DD. I know so many people in this situation, and feel really sad that every day I hear stories like this...
"I work in the City as does my French partner: the European bankers, lawyers and asset managers are all talking about how London has changed for them now and are thinking it may be time to head home."
My husband feels the same.

OP posts:
lessworriedaboutthecat · 26/05/2017 09:41

Where will you go given that we are basically watching Western European civilisation die horribly in slow motion in front of our eyes.

MissionItsPossible · 26/05/2017 09:53

YABU. I hate threads like this. If you want to move, then move and stop making a drama out of it.

Oh and whenever I hear things like "I work in the City as does my French partner: the European bankers, lawyers and asset managers are all talking about how London has changed for them now and are thinking it may be time to head home." I call bull. I may just about believe this when said by a European Average Joe, but how on Earth would life have changed since Brexit for anyone working in the city as a banker, lawyer or asset manager?

MumIsRunningAMarathon · 26/05/2017 10:06

Yabu

mission I agree! Oh the drama of it all

ringringringringringring · 26/05/2017 10:07

but how on Earth would life have changed since Brexit for anyone working in the city as a banker, lawyer or asset manager?

Career security and future opportunities. Quite a lot of their jobs will be moving post-Brexit. Numerous financial companies will be moving a lot of their business once being in London no longer means being in the EU. Various European countries are already lobbying for them to move their offices to their countries. qz.com/932209/brexit-could-be-good-for-dublin-but-maybe-a-little-too-good-for-its-central-bank/

ImperialBlether · 26/05/2017 10:13

but how on Earth would life have changed since Brexit for anyone working in the city as a banker, lawyer or asset manager?

Do you not read the news?

corythatwas · 26/05/2017 10:17

Academics are worried because of access to research funding. Civilisation may be dying in slow motion, but in the short term it means not being able to be part of a coordinated grant funding application, because it's European money. It means colleagues having to look elsewhere for collaborators, because there may not be any money to pay for the English contributor. It means projects not getting off the ground.

MissionItsPossible · 26/05/2017 10:17

Yes I do read the news. Stock markets and currencies go up and down all the time. The vote to Leave didn't affect the pound nowhere near as predicted. If anybody could give me a direct story of how anyone in that sector has been affected I'd be up for listening to it. But all I hear are things like "uncertainty". Yes, things are uncertain because no country has left the EU before. But to say London has "changed" and it's "no longer the same place as it was before the vote" I ask HOW has it changed and WHY do they feel it's no longer the same place?

allegretto · 26/05/2017 10:19

Where will you go given that we are basically watching Western European civilisation die horribly in slow motion in front of our eyes.

I think you are looking at the wrong news sources. Most people don't think like this.

allegretto · 26/05/2017 10:20

Mission - not knowing what your position is (legally) and whether or not you will be allowed to stay in the country is pretty stressful, no?

Aridane · 26/05/2017 10:21

For those of us working in the City in UK branches of overseas (UK) financial institutions, Brexit is potentially catastrophic. Long term, our UK branches may be shut as we will no longer have the ability to 'passport' from one EU country to the UK. Freedom of movement and services and all that.

Or if we set up as a UK domiciled bank / financial institution, we will need more capital and have to cut costs / staff to afford that.

A number of financial institutions in this position have blanket freezes on new hires in the UK

Somerville · 26/05/2017 10:24

I totally understand. You have an obvious other place to go - his home country, and it's not disloyal to move there if it suits your family more.

We're tentatively planning to move to an EU country once my oldest two DC are through their A'levels. There will be more opportunities for us, in terms of our careers, and for our younger DC. DH is fluent in the language but I'm not (yet), but improving all the time. If Brexit is soft, which looks unlikely, then we may well be able to stay. But those language skills can't be picked up at the last minute so we're putting the time in now.

NoLoveofMine · 26/05/2017 10:26

Where's better than the UK? There is far more racism in Europe and the UK is more multicultural than any other country. People get on far better here than anywhere else.

user1486062886 · 26/05/2017 10:28

Allegretto, you know fare well that all EU workers will be allowed to stay and quite rightly so, is up to the EU and Uk to agree this it's not all one sided, what are we going to have 3-4 million deportations and 1 million from the EU,

MissionItsPossible · 26/05/2017 10:28

allegreto I completely understand that which is why I said I understand that people are uncertain and may not feel they have the security that they did but to me that doesn't equate to that London has changed and is no longer the same as it was before the referendum. Aside from the aforementioned uncertainty I really don't see this argument. As said if anybody has a direct example I'm open to hearing it

Tamatoa · 26/05/2017 10:28

Are we supposed to be sad you are going? Or try and stop you?

NoLoveofMine · 26/05/2017 10:29

I'm not sure how "London has changed" unless they're specifically talking about their job and the future prospects within that industry in which case I can see what they mean. The city itself certainly hasn't and is hardly a Brexit stronghold.

MissionItsPossible · 26/05/2017 10:29

NoLove that's what pisses me off too with those arguments people saying the uk has turned nasty and racist. Try visiting Eastern Europe or even parts of France and Spain as a non white person and THEN youll see what a nasty and racist country can really be like

allegretto · 26/05/2017 10:30

There is far more racism in Europe

This comment is so ironic. Sweeping generalization about a whole continent!

NoLoveofMine · 26/05/2017 10:31

On my road in London neighbours include an Australian family, French, German, American - this isn't rare around here or beyond and, whilst none are happy about the outcome of last year's referendum (barely anyone I've come across is), they still think London is an incredible place and so much more varied, multicultural and integrated than anywhere abroad.

lessworriedaboutthecat · 26/05/2017 10:31

Allegretto I read the Guardian and the Independent and my only real source of television news is the BBC. The only time I'm exposed to Breibart is when someone occasionally posts a link on here which is usually a sure sign that they've lost the argument. What news sources would you recommend other than Russell Howard ?

Madbengalmum · 26/05/2017 10:31

Yawn, because life is soooo much better everywhere else in Europe! Tedious.

allegretto · 26/05/2017 10:32

Allegretto, you know fare well that all EU workers will be allowed to stay

I'm glad you are sure because as far as I know, nothing has been decided yet. Whether they are allowed to stay or not, that doesn't take away from the fact that people feel different about the UK now - there was a massive increase in racially-motivated crime after Brexit too.

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NoLoveofMine · 26/05/2017 10:32

Try visiting Eastern Europe or even parts of France and Spain as a non white person and THEN youll see what a nasty and racist country can really be like

Quite, as POC friends of mine including my boyfriend have told me first hand.

Sweeping generalization about a whole continent!

It's what I believe from what I know and what many have told me, including nationals of many of these countries. I think it's difficult to dispute; I can't think of any European country which has more multiculturalism and less racism than here.

artycakemaker · 26/05/2017 10:33

I think the OP is just expressing sorrow that her future is so uncertain, Tamatoa.

my BF is a German-born doctor. She has 3 kids all born here and has lived here for 20 years. She is extremely anxious about what 'her status' is going to be as an EU citizen. Sure she is looking into citizenship- but it is bloody expensive, and she can afford it but loads in a similar situation cannot.

Our livelihood is completely and totally dependant on free trade with the EU. (DH and my livelihood I mean). We have already seen suppliers cancelling orders etc because of uncertainty and our income has dropped to less than half.At the moment we are using savings to make up the shortfall, but we are having the discussions about 'what if' and how much longer the uncertainty can go on for and have started considering options-including returning to my home country. I would hate that more than I could say. I have lived in the UK for 20 years, and adore it here.But there is a certain reality we may need to face when the brexit stuff is finally sorted.

It is very uncertain, scary time for us.

Fairysnuff321 · 26/05/2017 10:34

Mission -That was shared from someone else not my personal story as it's in quotes. The point is I don't want to move, my elderly father is here, this isn't easy. Would you find uprooting your familly simple? Your comments are pretty callous tbh.
Apart from my own experience above I hear similar from others everyday. Musicians and orchestras are having problems, this affects so many sectors.
Just because it you want LEAVING to be a good thing won't make it so. There is plenty of good evidence some posted above. I don't need any more convincing as it's affecting my family directly. Unfortunately it looks like some won't see what's obvious until the UK economy is completely wiped out.
Here's an article from the Financial Times ...
www.ft.com/content/c86df908-3d07-11e6-8716-a4a71e8140b0

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