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To feel guilty about this?

(188 Posts)
Ginmakesitallok Thu 25-May-17 18:19:59

Was hit by another car today going into a car park - after 2 barriers lanes merge into one, other driver should have given way, didn't and went into my side. Not too much damage, but could be costly respray, dent needs knocked out. Totally his fault. 18 year old driver, only had car a couple of weeks, insurance extortionate etc etc. His mum called me asked me not to go through insurance - I said I'd get a quote for damage, but I'd also tell my insurer . She asked me not to - it'll put his insurance through the roof, he has a high excess.

But - this has happened before (not the same accident obviously )and I've never gone through insurance, and always ended up with a shite repair job..

If I go through my insurance they will pick my car up, give me a courtesy car, get car fixed properly and deliver it back.

How do I know they will cough up? ? I've let my insurance know - but said I don't know if I want to make a claim.

Life would be easier for me to go via insurance, that's what I pay it for. Why do I feel so guilty???

Pinkypie12 Thu 25-May-17 18:22:20

If he is going to pay why go through the insurance?

harderandharder2breathe Thu 25-May-17 18:22:45

His mum wants you to feel guilty.

You should go through the insurance.

GeillisTheWitch Thu 25-May-17 18:23:24

I'd go through insurance. I was in a similar situation and the lady suggested not taking it through insurance but I wasn't willing to take the risk that there was further hidden damage and I wanted it properly checked out by an authorised insurance repairs garage.

WhooooAmI24601 Thu 25-May-17 18:23:28

Insurance is there for this very reason. I'd question anyone who was so desperate not to go through their insurers; do they even have it?

Ginmakesitallok Thu 25-May-17 18:25:27

I don't know him from Adam - how do I know he'll pay? What worried me slightly was that when his mum called me she tried to imply it was my fault - that somehow I'd gone into his lane. How do I know that after I get it fixed he'll not refuse to pay up?

startwig1982 Thu 25-May-17 18:25:44

This is why insurance is there. Otherwise you may not get the amount due and a rubbish repair job.

Ginmakesitallok Thu 25-May-17 18:26:10

He's with same insurance Co as me.

Pinkypie12 Thu 25-May-17 18:26:15

Go to a garage, get it checked over, get a quote then they can pay

Allthebestnamesareused Thu 25-May-17 18:27:06

Sorry - go through the insurance. If there are any problems whatsoever then you have comeback.

Also as you say are they going to pay for a courtesy car for you whilst its being repaired? Also if there is hidden damage will they then not want to pay for it because you said it would be X to start with.

It is too bad and the teen will unfortunately have made a costly mistake but will pay more attention next time.

Funnyface1 Thu 25-May-17 18:27:50

This happened to me recently and lady asked me not to go through insurance. She said she wouldn't be able to afford to insure her car anymore if I claimed etc. But she had gone into the back of me. Even though it didn't look that bad it couldn't be repaired and I lost my car. She turned nasty when she found that out.

Go through insurance. Feel as guilty as you like but go through insurance. It's there to make sure you don't get screwed. It was his fault and you don't owe them anything.

Pinkypie12 Thu 25-May-17 18:27:53

When I did this I got the quote, they gave me money and job done. I don't see why you would make song and dance about it. It will put his insurance up loads and I wouldn't feel very nice doing it tbh. I would always offer them chance to pay themselves first.

Allthebestnamesareused Thu 25-May-17 18:27:56

Crossed with your update. If they are already questioning who is at fault definitely go through insurance.

MrsBobDylan Thu 25-May-17 18:28:48

Go straight for insurance.You pay a premium to have insurance which covers pick up and a courtesy car. I doubt the mum will want to pay for that on top of repairs.

MyNameIsNotYourName Thu 25-May-17 18:28:53

Is go through insurance? You can't be guilt tripped by his mother for his own fault. He should take more care when driving

Floralnomad Thu 25-May-17 18:29:00

Just go through the insurance , if he wants to claim it wasn't his fault then they can investigate , if it was his fault it will be a good lesson learned . What's the damage to his car ?

Sn0tnose Thu 25-May-17 18:29:05

Don't let her guilt trip you. If she's already implying that it was your fault, then there's every chance they'll dispute liability once you've forked out for the repairs. And what do you do then?

MyNameIsNotYourName Thu 25-May-17 18:29:09

I would go through insurance I mean

Kit30 Thu 25-May-17 18:30:00

Go through and out insurance. If you don't tell them about the accident & they find out it can invalidate your policy

MrsBobDylan Thu 25-May-17 18:30:57

And don't feel guilty, you are not responsible for this man being able to afford insurance as some pp have suggested.

SnowBallsAreHere Thu 25-May-17 18:32:50

I had a similar sob story from the mum of an 18 year old who smashed into my parked car. Guilt trip about ruining his insurance record etc. I went through insurance and needed a courtesy car and mine had £2k worth of damage as he hit my car so hard. Found out later that that was the second car he'd crashed since passing his test.

sparepantsandtoothbrush Thu 25-May-17 18:33:01

I understand you feeling guilty but you really need to go through the insurance.

SnowBallsAreHere Thu 25-May-17 18:34:15

Posted too soon...
I felt no guilt it was his choice to drive so badly, and ruin his insurance record.

Ginmakesitallok Thu 25-May-17 18:34:52

Bit of a scrape to his front side bumper/light. The sort of damage I'd live with if it was my fault.

sonjadog Thu 25-May-17 18:36:35

Definitely go through the insurance. I learnt this lesson a long time ago. A car drove into the back of me and he asked not to use insurance and I went along with it. Turned out a while later that there was a lot more damage there than appeared and I ended up having to pay for it myself. Never again will I not go through the insurance post-crash.

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