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AIBU?

To think I can manage a 1hr 50 min commute each way

197 replies

Lucyannieamy · 25/05/2017 16:33

Hi
I currently have a 35-45min commute from London zone 3 in. We are seriously looking at moving out, but need some views on whether the commute would be a killer.
Looks like it'd be leave home about 7am for a 7.30 train, 50 min into London, 25mins across London to get into the office on time. Way home is a little quicker train so if I left at 5 I should get home about 6.45

Kids are 7&4 and DH would work local.

Is it worth it to get out of London?

OP posts:
Rinkydinkypink · 25/05/2017 16:35

Is it worth it to get out of London?

Depends if you actually want to see your family!

Personally it sounds horrific. You'll be worn out. If you want to get out of London either move jobs and house and take the pay cut or if you need the money then be thankful at least you see you DC!

ThereIsNoSuchThingAsRoadTax · 25/05/2017 16:36

I think it depends upon whether you routinely end up working at home in the evenings now, and if you would be able to do that work on your commute. If so, then you aren't going to be missing a lot of 'home time'. If not, I think it would be an absolute killer. Four hours of travelling on top of busy work day would be my idea of hell.

Whatisitnow101 · 25/05/2017 16:37

Would that be for 5 days a week?
Would the increase in fare and travelling times be worth it to you?
I wouldn't do it personally.

caffeinestream · 25/05/2017 16:38

Never. It would be hellish in summer (too hot) and I'd hate to be commuting for four hours a day!

Not worth it all IMO. And would the added transports costs really mean you save any money overall?

CaptainObviousTwo · 25/05/2017 16:38

Urgh, rather you than me. I'm looking at ways to cut my commute - and its only 45 mins each way!
That's more than 3.5 hours a day, presuming there's no hold up. Theres a lot you can do in 3.5 hours.

greenworm · 25/05/2017 16:39

The thing is, it's only going to be 1hr 50 when everything is running on time. When there are cancellations, delays, strikes, abandoned baggage etc it's going to turn into an absolute nightmare. I'd be seriously looking at how reliable the lines involved are. Also how likely you'd be to get a seat - commuting sitting down is very different to commuting standing up.

PatriciaHolm · 25/05/2017 16:39

That's approx what DH does - he's out of the house from about 7.20-8.30pm every day. It's tiring, and he tries to do a day from home most weeks. If the trains are up the spout, he stays home - fortunately he has the kind of job where that's fine. Would DH always be able to collect the kids if (when) you have transport issues - DH's trains are regularly disrupted. He can cycle from the mainline station to the office too which means he gets exercise, relieves the monotony of the journey and doesnt have to rely on the tube....

Whatisitnow101 · 25/05/2017 16:39

I was coming back to say what green said!

TiredMumToTwo · 25/05/2017 16:40

I did this for three months - it was a killer, no way I would do it again.

gleam · 25/05/2017 16:40

Could you do compressed hours 4 days a week or work from home a couple of days a week?

MissShittyBennet · 25/05/2017 16:41

It sounds awful.

Chathamhouserules · 25/05/2017 16:41

Is it five days a week? I do similar but only 3 days, and I can work from home say 2 days per month. My job is quite flexible too, i.e. Leave a bit early and work on the train. It's doable and I'm glad we left London.

amusedbush · 25/05/2017 16:41

I've never lived in London but I used to commute two buses and 90ish minutes each way, and it was horrific. I was absolutely knackered and by the time I got home, had dinner, tidied up and washed my hair, it was bedtime!

My commute is now less than 30 minutes door to door, including the wait at the train station in the morning (which takes 7 minutes to get into town - bliss!). I could never go back.

Toomanycats99 · 25/05/2017 16:43

It's knackering. My commute is around 1.15 in The morning 1.30 coming home. I do 3 days in the office which is manageable. 4 days wipes me out. 5 days I wouldn't want to contemplate! I am lucky in that I live somewhere with multiple station / route options. If you are further out how frequent are the trains? If one is cancelled does that add 15 minutes or an hour to the journey?

Chathamhouserules · 25/05/2017 16:43

My train (southwest) is far more reliable than London suburban trains. In a year only had a handful of delays. But I wouldn't do it five days. Would get a bit sick of the train.

Emily7708 · 25/05/2017 16:43

God no I wouldn't - I have a 50 minute commute across London and that's more than enough. There are always delays too - strikes, incidents etc.

TheNaze73 · 25/05/2017 16:44

Sounds like a reasonable commute. Good luck

FuzzyCustard · 25/05/2017 16:44

I did a longer commute (15 mins walk to station, 60 mins on train, 45 min walk to office) into London for some years and it was absolutely worth it to live in the countryside and have the quality of life that I wanted.

I used to take a shorter lunchbreak (nominally half an hour, in reality, sarnie at desk) and leave on time every day (need a thick skin for this) and was out of the house from 7am to 7pm.

CookieDoughKid · 25/05/2017 16:44

Don't do it. It will wind you down very fast.

Loopytiles · 25/05/2017 16:44

Too long IMO.

My commute has been 90 mins each way for around 6 years (4 days a week) and it's shit. It has had negative effects on my career and relationship, and am often too tired to do much with DC during the week, even basic stuff like cooking and reading/homework. I and many people near me leave home at 6.30am.

Chathamhouserules · 25/05/2017 16:45

Is there potential for you to get a job more locally?

Crackedidiot · 25/05/2017 16:45

Seems that your timings are cutting it fine. What if there was a hold up of 5 minutes at the start- you could be an hour late for work and be in a panic all the way there.
I wouldnt do it .
Is there no other area you can move to -one that needs less travel or perhaps on your employers side of the city so you dont have to cross london at least? But even then its still a long day and your DH would have to be reliable in picking up his end of the home responsibilities.

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megletthesecond · 25/05/2017 16:46

Sounds hellish. And 1hr 50 would only be when it runs smoothly.

pangolina · 25/05/2017 16:48

My commute is 60 mins and I have just handed my notice in. It's terrible. When you live that far from work you have such a small margin for things to go wrong and delays, Im constantly stressing about being late. It isnt worth it.

OlennasWimple · 25/05/2017 16:52

YABU

DH and I both did this for about 18 months. We moved house (to zone 3) rather than continue it any longer, otherwise it would have killed one of us.

Firstly there is the stress of getting to the station on time for a particular train (rather than just turning up at a tube station or a zone 3 train station and getting the next train coming). Then you may not get a seat, so you have a long time to stand around. Even if you do sit down, your dreams of working in that 50 mins will more likely be some email catching up (not to be sniffed at, admittedly), half hearted look through the Metro, and trying not to have too much bodily contact with a stranger who really needs a good wash.

Then there are too many opportunities for things to go wrong with your three part journey - if there is an accident on the road to the station, a delay on the train or a tube line out of action (or all three on the same day, as happened to us once...) the knock-on effect is immense. How frequent are the trains? Unless they come every 15 mins it's catastrophic to miss the one you are aiming for.

The cost of the season ticket will be immense (our parking ticket was something like £4000 a year, then a train plus zone 1 ticket was £6000 each...). If you work from home on a regular basis in order to reduce the long commute, you will be spending money on something you won't be using (that always rankled me, I know not everyone will be bothered)

Your DH will have to be solely responsible for the DC. Fine most of the time, but what's your back up plan for when he is sick, or has to work somewhere else for the day? And what's your back up, back up plan for when your train is delayed on the day you have to get back for the DC? (This is easier if you have friends or family locally - we moved somewhere we didn't know anyone, so had no immediate support network for this sort of occasion)

In short, we hated it. It felt like the worst of both worlds to us - we couldn't enjoy living in the countryside because we were always on a train; we couldn't enjoy London because we had to keep an eye on the last train home, and we still had to pay the eye-watering cost of a TfL ticket.

sorry to sound so negative!

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