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AIBU?

to report after school incident to police

104 replies

vickibee · 24/05/2017 10:23

I went to collect my son from school yesterday (he is 10 and has HF ASD he is being supported in school with social difficulties), walking back to car a class mates Granddad stepped out of his vehicle and hurled abuse at me following a playtime incident between my DS and his GS. Gs had complained to him that my son had fell on him on school field and hurt his leg. He was stood about a foot away from me staring me right in the face and shouting at me. no swearing or threats but I felt intimidated. my Ds ran ahead and waited by our car 50 yards away. He said my sons behaviour was out of control and he demanded that I should keep him away from his GS. I was a disgrace for a parent if I allowed these behaviours etc. He was trying to block my way but I got through and my son and I went back to school to report to HT. She seemed very supportive and said she will look into matters today but should I report to police?

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user1491572121 · 24/05/2017 10:27

I would. Is he crazy?? Not that it excuses his behavour, but have there been any other incidents where your DS has hurt other kids?

Saucery · 24/05/2017 10:27

I wouldn't at this stage, but I would expect the school to approach the man about his behaviour. If it were to happen again then yes, I would contact the police to report ongoing harassment by him.

vickibee · 24/05/2017 10:31

no he is not malicious, he actually said it was a girl who fell on him and he was present at the time, this boy seems to enjoy getting my son into trouble as he is an easy target. The HT said that my son is a lovely child despite his issues and that he is a pleasure to have in school. His behaviour is often inapproriate though and annoying. he will take a scarf and run off with it or make silly noises at people. He is not violent

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vickibee · 24/05/2017 10:32

school said as it is a Go they can only talk to the parents :(

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soapboxqueen · 24/05/2017 10:34

I would be in two minds to log it with police or not. On the one hand I wouldn't want to escalate things with someone who is unhinged but in the other, I wouldn't want this other kid to think this kind of harassment is OK.

user1491572121 · 24/05/2017 10:34

Well I would do as Saucery says thinking about it. Wait and see...or speak to the police and see if they can "log" it incase of anything else happening.

I do think you should be careful of minimising your DS' innapropriate behaviour though. Not that this idiot has the right to shout at you...but One of my DC HATES having things taken from her and would get very upset at having a scarf taken and the taker running away.

If things like this happened more than once, it could be very upsetting for some kids.

vickibee · 24/05/2017 10:37

he is autistic and doesn't understand the social norms the rest of us take for granted. I always correct his bad behaviour if I see it, make him apologise etc I think because he is so HF other people don't even realise he has special needs.

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Saucery · 24/05/2017 10:39

Are you happy with the way the school handle your DS's behaviour, Op? Because if you are and they are doing a good job of teaching him strategies to minimise negative impact on his peers then it's being tackled correctly.

Freddystarshamster · 24/05/2017 10:42

Why on earth would you expect the police to "log" anything which isn't a crime?

vickibee · 24/05/2017 10:43

on the whole,
during lessons he is a model pupil, HT says he is one of the politest and kindest boys in school. It is unstructured times where he struggles especially dinner where there is limited supervision. He has an IEP

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vickibee · 24/05/2017 10:43

apparently intimidating behaviour like this is a crime

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Freddystarshamster · 24/05/2017 10:45

No it's not. From as you described your OP there are no offences there at all

scurryfunge · 24/05/2017 10:48

Are you a police officer Freddy?

frozenfairy123 · 24/05/2017 10:48

The school needs to speak to the parents and say that threatening behaviour by grandparents will not be tolerated.
I don't think u should waste police time unless u felt like he was actually going to hit u? Xx

BastardBloodAndSand · 24/05/2017 10:50

Eh ?? He thinks your son's out of control because he fell on another child ??

Well I.wouldn't log it it with the police because they won't do much (( tho they might see it as threatening and intimidating behaviour )) but I would file him as 'complete knobhead' and refuse to.engage in future.

leighdinglady · 24/05/2017 10:52

Criminal solicitor here - I really doubt the police would care. He's not touched you or caused to fear of immediate attack. He's not sworn or used threatening or abusive words or behaviour as per the public order act. There's no offence that I can see from what you've said.

Freddystarshamster · 24/05/2017 11:00

Yes.

HildaOg · 24/05/2017 11:01

I'd complain to the police. It was intimidation and harassment.

diddl · 24/05/2017 11:06

The school can only talk to parents?

Was this GP actually collecting a child or just being a busybody?

Surely if he was there collecting a child from the school then the school can talk to him?

vickibee · 24/05/2017 11:06

my instinct is to report to the police - I certainly felt intimidated. Another parent was concerned enough to ask if I was Ok and told him to back off

I feel so sorry for my Ds, he suffers from anxiety as it is and this has made him worse, he did not want to go to school today and I got a death look form the boy's mother. They have been friends since reception and fall out and make up etc.

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HerOtherHalf · 24/05/2017 11:07

Why would you even think this was a police matter? Get a grip. As recent events have shown, they have far more important things, like actual crime.

vickibee · 24/05/2017 11:07

he was collecting his GS

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vickibee · 24/05/2017 11:09

he was so out of control that I felt like it could turn nasty at any time. he wouldn't let me pass and put his body in front of me. Meanwhile his GS sat smirking in the car thinking it was hilarious. what a role model?

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niknok69 · 24/05/2017 11:11

I would probably not report it to the police, as upsetting as it was. I would however report to the school. Parents (GP included) and children in most schools are reminded that rules apply to and from school. I think the school needs to let him know this is NOT OK!

vickibee · 24/05/2017 11:17

i have - we went straight back to school to report incident and HTsaid she would sort it today.

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