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AIBU?

Paying for smashed TV

169 replies

Lovelilies · 19/05/2017 10:49

Help quick!
Bit of a dilemma. DS (3.5) playing at friend's house this morning with her DS also 3. I live 2 doors down and had just nipped home for something. The TV got smashed. The Mum says she saw my DS throw a toy plane at the TV.
Background, their TV got smashed last week when the 2 boys were alone in their lounge, it was assumed the other boy did it as he has 'form' for breaking things. My DS likes to play with him. He's pretty non verbal so have to go by what my DS says.
Now I wasn't there when it happened this time. My DS says the other boy did it. I do realise he's 3, and may tell fibs. I don't really think my DS did it, but like I say I wasn't here and the other Mum says she saw it.
So I have given her £230 (what she thought he TV cost).
Now her dick head partner is kicking off saying it cost £320 and I need to give them more money..
help!!

OP posts:

Report

RedHelenB · 19/05/2017 10:51

Don't. 3 year olds need supervision .

Lovelilies · 19/05/2017 10:51

Now she says she's borrowed the rest off her friend and I now owe her the rest of the money...
we are were friends by the way-- 😢--

OP posts:

Artisanjam · 19/05/2017 10:53

Tell her to claim it on her home insurance and that the money you e already paid will cover the excess and increase in premiums for making a claim.

SaorAlbaGuBrath · 19/05/2017 10:54

I'd have offered half the value of the tv as a goodwill gesture, but really she was asking for trouble leaving two 3 year olds unsupervised!! And aggressively demanding money is extortion and illegal, her partner needs to back off!

Lovelilies · 19/05/2017 10:54

She says they don't have insurance. I did say my money should cover the excess

OP posts:

SaorAlbaGuBrath · 19/05/2017 10:55

Not your fault they're too lazy/disorganised to have insurance!

Questioningeverything · 19/05/2017 10:55

Nah kids are in their care, they assume the responsibility. If they don't want to fine, but honestly they're trying to screw you for money here.

BandeauSally · 19/05/2017 10:56

she is an idiot for letting them be unsupervised especially after it was already smashed the week before. Her bill to pay. You've offered more than half. Thats her lot.

Lovelilies · 19/05/2017 10:57

I feel shit. I don't want to lose a good neighbour friend, but I'm not handing over more cash cos her partner is a bully.
He will kick off with her she should get rid of him he's horrid and I feel guilty even tho I don't even think my DS did it, I think she's saying that so her DP doesn't go mad at her iyswim

OP posts:

Lovelilies · 19/05/2017 11:10

She's still saying she needs the money, and doesn't have insurance..

OP posts:

44PumpLane · 19/05/2017 11:12

The cash you've given already would cover excess on insurance and increased premiums- it's not your fault they are too reckless to take out insurance. This is exactly the chance they take.

Also with two 3 year olds she should have been supervising, and given what happened last week if she couldn't supervise she should have moved them to a different room while she went and did whatever it is she needed to do (as clearly you can't watch kids for every second of every day- but it was her responsibility to ensure a safe environment).

Do not give her any further cash

Lovelilies · 19/05/2017 11:14

Should I just stop replying then?

OP posts:

2boytrouble · 19/05/2017 11:16

You've already handed over a lot of cash! If it were me and my friends we'd most like split it 50/50 just out of politeness!

Lay the line down. You've already given over half the cost of the tv!

BurntBum · 19/05/2017 11:18

What idiot doesn't have insurance? I would just ignore. You've been more than reasonable. She doesn't sound like much of a friend.

Lovelilies · 19/05/2017 11:22

Am I legally obliged to pay more?
Just need to be prepared when the Neanderthal comes over

OP posts:

Plumkettle · 19/05/2017 11:24

She, and more so her partner, is a chancer OP.

Please don't give them any more money. It will never end otherwise.

PurpleCrazyHorse · 19/05/2017 11:27

Not your problem they don't have insurance, we have accidental damage insurance for this very reason and that is exactly why you have insurance. Personally I would have paid only what their excess was as it's unlikely their insurance premium would go up much after a (relatively cheap) TV claim. Ours didn't after DH ran over his laptop on our driveway!!

You've given more than enough money, my only issue would be if you gave them cash as there's no way of proving you gave them the money. I'd always do it via a cheque or bank transfer. Can you get the GF to confirm back by text or email that they've received the money?

Otherwise ignore, you've paid over half.

BandeauSally · 19/05/2017 11:27

No you are not legally obliged to pay anything! The children were in her care, she consented to looking after your son while you nipped home. She assumed responsibility for all that happened whilst you were gone. You have no obligation to pay anything. You have already been more than generous in paying more than half the cost. She has been negligent on two counts, 1) she didnt supervised the children. 2) she didn't insure her valuables. This is her cost to bear.

Send her a text saying that she failed to adequately supervise the children and an accident happened involving your child. Say that it's unfortunate that she chose not to insure her valuables but despite you having no legal obligation to pay anything you have already generously paid £230 which is more than half the cost of the TV and that you will not be offering any more money.

Then don't respond to any further texts or calls from her.

gamerwidow · 19/05/2017 11:28

You're not legally obliged to pay a penny. She was supervising so it's up to her to make sure nothing gets broken.
I think you would be morally obliged to pay the excess on the insurance if they were insured. You've already paid for more then that don't give her another penny.

gandalf456 · 19/05/2017 11:29

50% is reasonable. Technically, it is her fault because she was in charge of them because you weren't even there andthen there's the fact that it's not really clear who actually did it. If it were my TV, I think I'dhave to suck it up but probably wouldn't have playdates for a while....

Justmadeperfectflapjacks · 19/05/2017 11:29

I wouldn't have given any cash!! Dc that young who have 'form' for damage shouldn't have been left unsupervised and she knows it!!
Not your fault she isn't insured. . Don't hand over any more. . And don't have the ds at your house either!! Df prob send him round with a bat for your TV!!

SkyBluePinkToday · 19/05/2017 11:34

She was supervising so it's up to her to make sure nothing gets broken.

^This.
If kids that young are left unsupervised something bad will happen.

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PersianCatLady · 19/05/2017 11:35

Are you honestly telling me that she got a new TV last week and she didn't take steps to keep it extra safe?

My cat jumped onto the stand where our old TV used to be and pushed it backwards into the wall and the screen broke.

Once we got the new TV we tied it down to the unit using elastic so the TV can't be knocked over again.

It looks awful but it does the job.

Hereward1332 · 19/05/2017 11:35

Even if you were responsible, you would be obliged to pay the cost of a second hand TV not a new one. How much is a used TV worth? Not £320.

Rafflesway · 19/05/2017 11:38

They are trying it on IMO!

We bought our adult DD a fab tv from Tesco last year! Ok it was only 32" - but could have got bigger for not much more - Sharp Aquos with built in freeview and DVD player for £149. It is superb!

Is it one of these 60" jobs by any chance? If you know the make I would get looking on the internet so hopefully you can show her she can buy a more than adequate replacement for £230 and especially bearing in mind the one that was broken wasn't brand new. Personally, I think the "Oaf" has decided to treat himself to a nice little upgrade at your expense seeing as you handed the initial £230 over without hesitation.

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