Ds and two other boys have been bullying another child. I became aware straight away, gave ds a MASSIVE telling off and made him apologise. He was pretty shamed and cut the behaviour.
I did this with the other two and they apologised. Today at the sport club I saw ds hang back and watch me, so I listened in. It was the same stuff ( the other child was new to the sport and it involves ridicule and isolation for not being as good, following them too to really rub it in, not just comments).
I again spoke to ds for not telling me, he didn't join in and was on the edge but he didn't tell an adult either. He accepted being removed early as a consequence.
The other two this time I went further and messaged their mums. I was clear it was more than frustrated comments when the team lost, but actually following and bullying behaviour. I was clear I have witnessed it and it is not just the word of the child.
Mum 1 is giving excuses why her ds does it, whatever but he still needs to stop however he feels/ difficulties. She's not addressing it with him
Mum 2 is justifying as her ds loves the sport so much he is just getting frustrated and finds losing hard because of child x.
The children both did it openly near me after I removed ds and after telling them all last week about it. They clearly feel entitled to do so as they have backup. One mum told me last week her son had not acted a certain way and the child was over sensitive. He did, I heard and saw him! The other child is sensitive.
Aibu to just say to mum 2 find your own lift even if means he can't go every week and also cut the play dates etc when ds gets on so well. He has other friends, but he does like them but I don't want him thinking being a little shite is ok. He's pretty robust, I could switch him to another session/ night for the sport. Or is it unfair to effectively cut a friendship for him? He's a nice kid, only time he's ever been caught doing this, but then there's always a first isn't there and I don't want it to grow...
Managing friendship- overkill?
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AIBU?
To end/ cool ds friendships for this?
11 replies
JefferysJodpers · 18/05/2017 18:37
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