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WIBU? Dogs in park

(37 Posts)
WildImaginings Thu 18-May-17 14:49:20

 I took the two dogs to the park yesterday with my Nan. One is a labradoodle, one a sharpei. Both under 2. My blood is absolutely boiling after an exchange with a woman there. I'm still shaking, and I don't think I was being unreasonable, but I would be mortified if I was. Sorry for the length of this, but I want to describe the background as best I can.

Both of the dogs are very well socialised, and they go to the park every day. They are playful and they love to run around, but they're not aggressive in the slightest. 

The park is well known amongst dog walkers, and the park encourages this. The park is of a good size but not massive, but there are a few clearly defined 'sections' (although not fenced off).

Dogs are free to run around the park, but there's a bit where you often see nervous dogs/owners, generally on a lead but sometimes off when no other nervous dogs are there. We never go anywhere near this part, and our dogs are well trained enough not to venture there.

We went to the park an hour or so later than usual (although we have walked them at this time before) so there was a mix of known and unfamiliar dogs. The first half an hour was absolutely fine. The dogs were doing their usual running around, playing with other dogs, and we were having the usual chats as we walked around with the various dog owners. 

After a couple of circles round we reached the field. This is where dogs run around, and the opposite side of the park to where the nervous dogs/owners are. There was a beautiful choc lab there playing with a ball, and she came wagging her tail over to our dogs, who immediately started to play with her. 

There was no barking at all, and all three dogs were wagging their tails. They were all jumping over each other trying to get the ball- just playful behaviour that we see every day there. The owner of the dog started trying to get her dog to come away. After about ten seconds of her trying I realised she was nervous, so I immediately started to walk over so I could leash the dogs and give her the opportunity to do the same. 

As I reached her she said 'Can you leash them or something, because they're going to do something to her, they're nasty and they're going to hurt her.' Her dog was bigger than both of my dogs, and their tails are all still wagging, and there's no barking/biting/aggressive behaviour.

I said (whilst leashing the dogs) 'That's what I'm coming here to do. They're not going to do anything to her at all, they're not nasty.' She said 'I don't want them anywhere near my dog'.

I pointed over to other side of the park and said 'If you're nervous then you might want to take your dog over there, it's much quieter and there are no other dogs there'. My dogs are both on leads at this point, her dog isn't, and her dog is trying to play with my dogs but they can't as they're on leads. 

She said 'I'm not putting her on a fucking lead, you'd better keep those two on leads and stay away from me.' At this point my Nan had arrived, and I was fuming. I told her she had another think coming if she thought I was going to keep my dogs on leads just because she doesn't want her dog to play. I told her she'd be better off staying away from the park between 7-9 am, because at this point it's full of dogs who all know and play together.

She walked off (with her dog still not on a lead) and screamed that I was a silly bitch. All this while surrounded by elderly dog walkers. 

If you've made it this far then thanks and sorry, I'm just still a bit in shock over this! We've been going there almost every day for almost 2 years, and this is the first time anything like this has happened. If for a second I thought that my dogs were being even slightly aggressive I would leash them. I've leashed them before when a dog has started to bark at them/try and attack them, and just calmly moved them away. 

WIBU at all? I actually really feel sorry for this ladies dog. She was so playful sad

WildImaginings Thu 18-May-17 14:53:18

I should add that we left about five minutes after this, because my Nan was embarrassed at being shouted at in front of her dog walking friends.

The lady was still there, with her dog on the field and not on a lead. Bigger dogs than ours were starting their circuit of the park.

MurielsBottom Thu 18-May-17 14:53:30

I don't think you were being unreasonable at all. It sounds like the women was frightened and doesn't know how to read the dog's behaviour. Have you ever seen her before?

lavei Thu 18-May-17 14:59:02

Hmmm. Perhaps her dog is female and in heat? Maybe she was worried if other dogs were sniffing around they may begin to get down to business 😉

You absolutely were not in the wrong. If she doesn't want her dog to be around others then she should have the dog on a leader.

I can, however understand her reaction to you telling her she should avoid the park at certain times. I understand what you were saying but perhaps she saw this as threatening?

minniemoi Thu 18-May-17 14:59:53

Not unreasonable at all. If she is so worried about her dog coming into contact with other dogs then she should keep it on a lead and away from places where there are lots of other dogs-although it doesn't sound like the dog was nervous or aggressive so that seems unnecessary
Some people seem to take it as a personal insult if they are asked to put their dog on a lead, I have no idea why.

WildImaginings Thu 18-May-17 15:03:45

Lavei I don't think I phrased that bit properly whilst typing it out. After she'd told me to basically fuck off and keep my dogs on a lead and away from her, I told her that she definitely wouldn't like the park between 7-9 when it's full of dogs off their leads who are all rolling down the hill together.

WildImaginings Thu 18-May-17 15:06:20

Murielsbottom I've never seen her there before, no.

Minniemoi that's the thing, her dog seemed playful and happy. And she told me my two were nasty dogs hmm

DJBaggySmalls Thu 18-May-17 15:10:55

If she wants other people to keep away from her dog she should leash it, or obedience train it so she can recall.
There are many batshit dog owners out there, try not to let them stress you.

DoloresTheRunawayTrain Thu 18-May-17 15:15:35

@lavei any owner who takes their unleashed dog to a park populated with other dogs while they are in heat is a total idiot who shouldn't be in charge of a post it note let alone a dog.

AlpacaLypse Thu 18-May-17 15:22:07

Sounds like yet another fine example of why I believe no one should be allowed to keep a dog until they've passed a course about basic dog care. I've thought for a long time that it's not dogs that need to be licensed, it's dog owners and carers.

LadyPW Thu 18-May-17 15:37:03

It drives me mad when you see someone with a really friendly dog who is desperate to play with other dogs but who has a (batshit) owner who won't let it. We've got a couple in our area - both kept on the lead (unlike OP's nemesis's dog) and dragged away from other (friendly) dogs. Barking.
But OP, YADNBU. She was a looney and shouldn't be allowed out in charge of a dog if she's taking that attitude.

PersianCatLady Thu 18-May-17 15:45:14

You are totally not BU.

WildImaginings Thu 18-May-17 16:23:31

Thanks you lot.

I think I've been overthinking it, I was just so shocked to be screamed at in the middle of the park and told my dogs are nasty!

Like I said, if I saw even one sign that they were going to be aggressive (which hasn't happened before) or even if they were being too boisterous and the other dog clearly wasn't interested, then I would not hesitate to leash them and move them away from the scene.

They are playful, and they do love to run and play with other dogs but they are not nasty dogs. And the other dog really wanted to play, I left the park feeling really sorry for her sad

NavyandWhite Thu 18-May-17 16:54:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheHodgeoftheHedge Thu 18-May-17 17:00:07

As a dog owner, I regularly think how much more I like dogs than people and idiot owners like this are why. Not only are they doing their own dogs no favours but they make other dog owner's lives so difficult.

Evilstepmum01 Thu 18-May-17 17:15:54

Yadnbu! If she was that bothered, she should have leashed her dog and moved away. Some owners are twats.
If you see her again, find a dog walking friend and see if she's so gobby with two of you there!

Evilstepmum01 Thu 18-May-17 17:15:58

Yadnbu! If she was that bothered, she should have leashed her dog and moved away. Some owners are twats.
If you see her again, find a dog walking friend and see if she's so gobby with two of you there!

justkeepswimmingg Thu 18-May-17 17:19:18

Perhaps the owner had a bad experience where her dog has been subjected to a unsociable spiteful dog, therefore is nervous of her dog being around other dogs jumping over each other. That being said she shouldn't have had her dog off the lead, if she is nervous about something happening. If she thought your dogs were nasty, then surely any normal person would put their dog on a lead and walk in the other direction? Or use the quieter side of the field. Strange reaction on her behalf. Any chance she didn't see you in time, and her dog doesn't have a great call back? Or maybe she has seen you before, and the dogs were playing 'roughly', so assumes they are aggressive? Nasty of her to call you names.

WildImaginings Thu 18-May-17 17:22:35

Navyandwhite I wouldn't have started this thread unless I was 100% sure. I'm sure they were playing nicely.

This is how it went: the choc lab runs over with the ball wagging her tail. Drops the ball and jumps at my dogs very playfully. All the dogs start sniffing each other. They then start running around after the ball and rolling in the grass. No barking, no biting, no aggression. Tails wagging at all times.

The whole reason I started this thread is because there was no reason for her to react like that.

AnnetteCurtains Thu 18-May-17 17:23:48

Forget it , the woman's either a loon or inexperienced

WildImaginings Thu 18-May-17 17:29:44

Justkeepswimmingg I'm not sure if she's seen us before, I've definitely not seen her there. We're usually there twice a day, in the morning and at around 4pm.

She was at the field when we started the approach, and it probably took us a good 30-45 seconds to reach the field. We could see her, so I assume she could see us?

She may have had a bad experience in the past, but I don't think there was any need for her to be so rude really. If she or the dog is nervous then I don't understand why she made no attempt to put her dog on a leash!

thecatsabsentcojones Thu 18-May-17 17:30:47

There are loads of nutty dog owners. Lucky this one hasn't made her dog a nutter too, it often rubs off. It leaves you really furious after an incident like that. Next time you see her call her a fucking nutty arsehole and tell her to leave you alone. Then slag her off to every other dog owner you know there.

WildImaginings Thu 18-May-17 17:33:01

I did feel awful for the poor dog. She was still trying to play with my two even after I had put the lead on them.

franciemczoo Thu 18-May-17 17:35:21

The other woman was totally out of order.

The rule is if the other dog if off lead then the owner deems their dog socialised and well trained enough to interact with other off lead dogs.

If the other dog is on a lead, you must not allow your dog to interact with their dog and put a lead on your dog if your dog is not sufficiently trained to do this off lead.

As her dog was off lead then you were perfectly entitled to let your dogs play with hers.

She's an ignorant bitch to speak to you like that and if you see her at the park again, it's probably best to give her a wide berth.

Judashascomeintosomemoney Thu 18-May-17 18:25:28

It doesn't really sound like you could have done anything differently tbh. But it does sound like she panicked and doesn't understand the difference between boisterous playing, play bows etc, and behaviour that could potentially spill over in to something more aggressive. I don't exactly blame her for that as it does take some time to learn that but she took her lack of confidence out on you and that's not fair. If I were you I'd forget it and move on, you did nothing wrong.

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