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WIBU regarding this incident? ** diagram included **

(28 Posts)
MsJuniper Tue 16-May-17 10:45:17

I am not a confident person but I am generally confident when driving - I am considerate, clear and think ahead so usually have a calm and easy time on the road. I've been driving for 23 years.

Unfortunately I had a bit of a horrible experience this morning while driving my son to nursery so I'd be interested in hearing whether I was unreasonable in my actions or my surprise at the response.

There's a fairly long road with parking on both sides which always takes a bit of negotiation. Currently there are some roadworks on this road so there are temporary traffic lights. Slows things down a bit but haven't had a problem since they were put up last week.

Today I got to the road and I could see a large minibus ahead of me waiting at the red light. It was at the peak of a hill so I couldn't see much beyond. Due to the layout/parking it was taking up most of the road so the traffic coming the other way was stuck and the bus was trying to inch out of the way. I hung back and had a look to see what I could do to get out of the way when the traffic came past.

There was a space to the right (between P4&5), but it looked like there were at least 3 cars coming past and I wasn't sure they'd get through if I waited by the space, so as car 1 (see diagram) moved forward, I moved into its place, with the intention of reversing into the space on the left (between P1&2) and letting all 3 cars pass easily. However at that moment car 2 came past the blockage and drove v fast right up to me and started trying to pass using the space on the right, gesticulating at me. I tried to indicate what I was intending to do, but he didn't give me the chance so I had to reverse back in a straight line (if I had reversed into the space we would have collided as he was so close). He wound his window down and I did too, to try and explain politely but he just screamed abuse at me through the window - right into my face as we were close and I obviously couldn't move at this point.

The two cars behind car 2 also got past the blockage and made the same assumption as him, all 3 drivers took a turn to scream at me as they passed while I tried to explain. The lights then must have gone green as the blockage cleared and I could continue on my way.

DS (4) was upset and I was quite shaken up. I could see that they had misunderstood and it must have been frustrating to be held up by the minibus previously, but it really was the kind of rage I've never seen before. Even if I had been the kind of driver who blithely got in others' way, I shouldn't have been subjected to that kind of shouting and swearing. Do people really go about doing that?

Anyway well done if you got through all that and hope you enjoyed the diagram!

SummerTimeSoon Tue 16-May-17 10:55:32

Poor you! I really really hate aggressive drivers angry
Who does he think he is screaming in your face and intimidating you and your child like that? I wish road ragers would be banned from the road, they are so dangerous and need to learn to control themselves asnd their emotions. I feel for you, that's a really horrible experience.

wellthisisnice Tue 16-May-17 11:14:19

I definitely don't think anyone deserves to be shouted at in any circumstance and hope that you and your ds are OK. I'm trying to understand why you didn't pull in to the space on your left to let the cars past?

scurryfunge Tue 16-May-17 11:22:41

Speak to Highways - sounds like there is insufficient time to let a stream through because of the parking on the roads.

BunloafAndCrumpets Tue 16-May-17 11:26:32

I would've done the same as you. I don't think you could've done anything differently. Staying where you were would have blocked the street for the oncoming cars.

What horrible people. I'm sorry you had to meet them. I have no advice other than keep window up and radio on if you think a similar situation might happen again. brewcakewine

MsJuniper Tue 16-May-17 11:40:01

I could have pulled into the LH space forward, but I thought if I reversed into it I'd be more tucked in to let everyone else past. My misjudgement was thinking I had longer to do this and then being unable to communicate with the other driver - I was trying to point and get him to give me a sec to do this.

Thanks for the sympathy all.

Oliversmumsarmy Tue 16-May-17 11:42:33

A lot of the time people don't look beyond the bonnet of their cars and can't see what is happening right read the situation.

littlebrownbag Tue 16-May-17 11:47:00

What a horrible experience, but it doesn't sound like you did anything majorly wrong - the other drivers were totally out of order.

I live on a similar long road that requires similar negotiation sometimes to allow traffic to pass - it's on a hill so I follow the highway code and always wait if I am the one waiting at the top for others to come up. I have had people overtaking me and flying down and causing all sorts of snarl-ups further down. Dickheads who don't have the patience to wait and evaluate a situation are everywhere I'm afraid.

neonrainbow Tue 16-May-17 11:50:21

It sounds like you were the only person who was trying to plan ahead to avoid a situation arising.

mactavish Tue 16-May-17 11:55:46

Poor you, how awful to be shouted at like that.
You sound like a v. conscientious person as you were carefully backing in to give people more space to get past.
Most people are not as conscientious/thoughtful as you and would have expected you to drive forwards into the space. They are judging you on their own low standards!
Hugs, and hope your day improves!

ChocChocPorridge Tue 16-May-17 11:59:41

You were being sensible, the only only thing you could have done to make it clearer would have been to signal - but it really sounds like car2 wouldn't have noticed anyway, since they were so determined to not give you a chance to help that they went to go around you on the wrong side.

As soon as any started yelling, I hope you wound the window up. People being abusive don't deserve explanations. Wind it up, and refuse to look at them.

morningconstitutional2017 Tue 16-May-17 12:03:05

My sympathies as I'm sure you were trying to do the right thing. Some people behave really badly in situations like this - and there's no accounting for them, I'm afraid.
I'm a fairly confident driver but I always try to avoid reversing in a hurry or in a stressful situation as it puts the wind up me, especially if I'm being watched.
I once had to do what felt like a 63 point turn in a car park to get past an old bloke in his ridiculously large classic car. He sat there twisting his cap and just watched. I was glad to get out of that one I can tell you. Put it down to experience.

diddl Tue 16-May-17 12:09:41

I think tha I would just have pulled forwards into the space on the left.

That said, you don't deserve to be shouted at.

There's obviously something wrong it if a minibus stopped properly at the red lights blocks the road-wtaf is that about?

Surely if the road is so blocked by parked cars drivers should just be blindly stopping right at the red light?

problembottom Tue 16-May-17 12:10:04

What an absolute twat, imagine the torture of being related or married to him, at least your encounter was brief.

I recently had grief from some wanker who sped past me when I was waiting for a articulated lorry to reverse onto a narrow road. There was a worker hand signalling me to wait, it really could not have been more obvious. Tosspot quickly realised there was nowhere to go, he had to reverse his Audi and tuck in behind me. Not so keen to make eye contact on his way back for some reason? wink

diddl Tue 16-May-17 12:10:25

that should be shouldn't just be...

Patchouli666 Tue 16-May-17 12:12:11

If the space between parked car 1 & 2 was only big enough to reverse in, it wasn't the correct thing to do to move forward to try and use it. Especially as the oncoming traffic had the green light and you knew that. You weren't gaining anything moving into the space. Bad decision on your part but you did meet some over the top nasty people who shouldn't have reacted that way. Your poor son

Ceto Tue 16-May-17 12:18:02

Did you indicate left as you moved forward?

Even if you didn't, the behaviour of these drivers was ridiculous. Having to wait half a minute or less to move up the road is hardly unusual in the course of a morning commute, and indeed they presumably delayed themselves further by slowing down to hurl abuse. Don't let idiots get you down.

passthewineplz Tue 16-May-17 12:18:07

There's some idiots on the roads, try and forget about him.

I'd have probably either gone into the gap at p2 rather than try to reverse, or waited where I was and let the idiot guy go into the gap and his side then gone into the gap at p2.

As you'd gone forward to try to reverse, it might have helped the other drivers understand your intentions by indicating that you wanted to reverse into the space.

SheRasBra Tue 16-May-17 12:20:53

Poor you OP! We can debate the ins and outs of how you might have manoeuvred your car but really, no-one should be behaving like this. Everyone is in a hurry to get somewhere in the morning and roadworks are a shared inconvenience. I have had a similar experience and it really shakes you up. Deep breath - it really isn't you, it's them!

PeachyPip Tue 16-May-17 12:21:23

I can see what you were doing. I would have shouted right back and I never shout! Would indicating and a lot of hand gesturing to the oncoming cars have helped? 🤷🏻‍♀️

NavyandWhite Tue 16-May-17 12:38:44

Some people cannot think beyond the end of their nose. You poor thing Op.

I see terrible driving every single day picking up and dropping off at school. It's a very busy residential area with lots of double yellows and parked cars and every day people just try and barge into the line of queuing traffic to come out of a side road instead of letting drivers coming IN to the road therefore causing total gridlock.

They then sit there with a stupid expression on their faces.

How some people pass their tests is beyond me.

Hope you're feeling a bit better now OP. brewcake

BonfiresOfInsanity Tue 16-May-17 12:53:38

You were absolutely in the right, so many twats on the road who don't think of the road ahead.

I had an incident outside the school where one side of the road is always parked up. I could see ahead a long queue of cars waiting to come down (I was on the side with no cars parked so my right of way) so waited at the bottom of the parked cars with enough room for everyone to drive through. The first car comes down and parks directly opposite me thus completely blocking anyone else moving. The cars behind had followed him down and in the meantime cars had come up behind me so I couldn't go backwards. I roll down my window and start gesticulating for him to move and pointing at the traffic but he just quickly looks away, gets out of the car with his DD and trots off into school. In the end I had mount the verge and drive into a hedge to allow movement of traffic through. I was seriously furious at the selfishness of that driver. I have included a bad diagram if anyone cares. grin

BonfiresOfInsanity Tue 16-May-17 12:54:29

OOPS. Attached now..

NavyandWhite Tue 16-May-17 13:02:24

Bonfire this is what happens every day at our school on one of the side streets. Sometimes I have to sit there for 5 mins or so because I'm blocked in because some dick doesn't forward thing. It's utter carnage.

EpoxyResin Tue 16-May-17 13:05:52

Twats. You're better than them and you know it. Had they your forethought they could have pieced together your plan. Idiots. I'd have started shouting:

"I'm fucking reversing you douchbag! Do you think I drove past a space FOR SUPER FUN TIMES?? You're a moron - back off and I'll be out of your way. Twat face."

...okay, so perhaps with a few fewer insults. But I'd definitely have gone with, "I'm reversing, dammit! Back off and you'll be able to pass!".

At least in my dreams I would have.

In my dreams I'm awesome.

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