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Husband moans whilst eating.

(163 Posts)
CrapTonOfKids Mon 15-May-17 21:36:52

I can't stand it! It's like this quiet, almost inaudible groan. A bit of a sex noise if I'm honest. I can't sit next to him at the dinner table because it makes me want to stab him with my fork. Speaking of which, he also holds his fork like a toddler, scooping with his fist facing downwards. I didn't pay much attention in the beginning of our relationship. Now I can't bear to watch him eat. His mother does it too. She gesticulates at the table with her cutlery in her hands! I caught one of our kids doing it, so being a responsible mother, I explained the importance of good table manners. It is important right? Please tell me I ANBU?

ThisIsStartingToBoreMe Mon 15-May-17 21:43:22


My ex dh used to ram food into his mouth so hard that the metal used to "ping" against his teeth. You could hear it.

Note he's my ex


WellErrr Mon 15-May-17 21:45:07

This would drive me crackers and I'd have to tell him.

I had a friend who did it too so I know exactly what you mean.

AntigoneJones Mon 15-May-17 21:45:59

I couldn't stand that. The point of table manners is so that other people don't feel uncomfortable around you.
Cant quite make out how he is holding his fork - any chance of a diagram?
Doesn't he use a knife and fork like a grown up?

JamieXeed74 Mon 15-May-17 21:47:12

Your being a snob

lilnutter Mon 15-May-17 21:47:13

Meh. You'll stop hearing it after a while. Or teach yourself after years of fighting about it. grin

I hear you though, I never noticed it before, I always hear my mother's voice in my head

echt Mon 15-May-17 21:47:26

My dear old mum said to me when I was teen, if you want to change the horrible habits of your loved one, do it early in the relationship.

YABU for not doing this sooner.

YANBU for finding it unbearable.

AntigoneJones Mon 15-May-17 21:48:47

'your being a snob' - no its not snobbish to want someone to eat like a normal adult in a family, not at all.

MrsChopper Mon 15-May-17 21:49:22

Maybe it's because your cooking is soooo nice and he appreciates it very loudly grin

My MIL will have a full on conversation with a stuffed mouth. It's disgusting and awkward at the same time.

youngestisapsycho Mon 15-May-17 21:49:29

You won't stop hearing it! I've been listening to my DH make strange eating noises for 15 years.... now DD has started making similar noises too! I have to eat fast and leave the table 😂

LadyGlitterSparklesSeriously Mon 15-May-17 21:49:52

Urrrggghhh MIL did this. It was like a gruff mmm-mmm sound.

DH went no contact for different reasons but I swear this is the thing I am most relieved about not putting up with anymore.

Violetcharlotte Mon 15-May-17 21:50:31

Ahhhh! DS1 went though a stage of doing this, used to drive me nuts!! He's stopped now thank goodness. I'm not sure what caused it, only thing I can think of was he was eating too fast.

UrsulaPandress Mon 15-May-17 21:51:31

DH slurps his morning coffee.

He may not have many more morning.

icy121 Mon 15-May-17 21:52:15

She's (or should it be 'shes'hmm) not being a snob!

Sometimes my OH makes quiet Homer Simpson noises if he's eating too quickly. Hate it. Lived with a girl who makes smacky lip noises when she eats - must be ever so slightly opening mouth when eating. Gross! Gulping drinks too - eurrrrgh

People are vile.

user1493759849 Mon 15-May-17 21:53:51

Tell him! I tell my DH when he is royally fucking me off!

He stops too.

He doesn't have/hasn't had many annoying habits, but when he does, I tolerate it for weeks or a few months, and then I HAVE to tell him, because it's either that or leave him!!!

Many times people don't realise they're doing annoying things.

Tell him.

It's not a good marriage if you can't say 'FOR FUCK'S SAKE WILL YOU STOP IT!!!!!!' angry

CointreauVersial Mon 15-May-17 21:54:02

Ugh, there's a guy at work like this. He literally goes "Om-nom-nom" while he's eating, with his mouth open. I have to leave the room.

user1493759849 Mon 15-May-17 21:57:01

LOL this reminds me of someone I know who said his girlfriend made loud OOOOHHHHHH and AAAHHHH and DO IT DO IT HARDER HARDER noises when he had sex with her (foreplay AND the rest!) He found it cringe, and nearly died of shame when his neighbour told him that they and SIX other neighbours were discussing it and laughing about it the other day.

A few weeks later, he and she split up. Ooops. blush

CrapTonOfKids Mon 15-May-17 21:59:06

JamieXeed I'll pay attention to you when you figure which word is correct, 'your or you're'

I've started mimicking him in a jokey (!) sort of way. He doesn't laugh...
His mother finds his food moaning habit adorable. Shit though, he's a grown man now, not a toddler!
I'm going to find a way to show you a diagram of the odd fork holding.

BMW6 Mon 15-May-17 21:59:44

YANBU OP. Nor are you a "snob" {fucking stupid remark}. Tell him it's driving you crackers and poke him with a fork every time he does it. I'm sure you also have habits that annoy him, so i'ts the ideal opportunity to do a deal on them!

GahBuggerit Mon 15-May-17 22:01:43

Ffs the thread titles just set my asthma off through laughing!

Very funny, sorry op. I have nothing to add.

theclick Mon 15-May-17 22:02:16

Ugh. This sounds disgusting OP. Can't you just tell him?

I remember seeing a woman like this in a cafe once. She sounded like she was having sex while eating what looked like a pretty normal salad. DH and I kept sniggering, we couldn't help it! I almost burst out laughing when she messaged her friend the cafe she was in and the friend (she told her DH) told her that she was just in a chain. (We were).

My MIL is an annoying table eater. Always leaves a complete mess around her plate (more than the kids) and, when eating Indian food with her hands but also talking to me, will keep gesticulating with her hands and touching my arm to get my attention (so basically touching me with her dirty food hands). I don't know how to handle it. A few times I've grimaced and pulled away from her but she still doesn't get it. Eww.

CrapTonOfKids Mon 15-May-17 22:05:03

He scoops like this. 😬

CrapTonOfKids Mon 15-May-17 22:05:29

And so does his mother!

FreeSpiritJen Mon 15-May-17 22:05:43

LOL who the heck says nom nom nom when they are eating?! re (Contreui comments.)

You have to tell yourhusband OP.

TrinityTaylor Mon 15-May-17 22:06:13

i suspect he holds the fork like the "never" on this picture, and sort of shovels

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