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AIBU?

3.5 not speaking yet

51 replies

Tinkerbec · 14/05/2017 19:45

My nephew is 3.5 and he can not speak just make sounds. Possibly he can say da or ma but I am not sure.

He doesn't respond to his name but communicates by pulling people if he wants them to play. He is very agile and loves climbing. He laughs and smiles. If there is 'mild peril ' on a cartoon he gets upset.

He does get frustrated and cries sometimes.

Parents just say he will get there but they look co

Should we be worried?

OP posts:

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Bananamama1213 · 14/05/2017 19:47

I would be worried. My daughter will be 4 in July. She's been talking in sentences for ages now.

Biggreygoose · 14/05/2017 19:54

I would be worried.

Ds is 2.2 and using two word phrases (more juice, my shoes, bye bye and kisses, let's go, that's silly etc).

Difficult when it's not your DC though. Does he recognise animals baba for sheep or quack for duck?

CaffeineBomb · 14/05/2017 19:54

Yes it does sound a little concerning my dc is coming up to two and a half and speaks in sentences. As you're not his parent I'm not sure what you can do apart from gently suggest a chat with the health visitor

altiara · 14/05/2017 19:56

I'd be worried. Mine were late speakers with a few words at 2 and then properly talking at 3. They both had hearing problems and referrals to a speech therapist. At the 2 year check, this should have been picked up. The parent can go to the GP or HV and get a referral for speech therapy and a hearing test.

PastysPrincess · 14/05/2017 19:57

Yeah, definitely be worried. My DS has just turned three and sounds very similar. We have referrals for ENT (hearing ruled out) Speech and Launguage, Community Teaching and Community Paediatrician.

user1471443504 · 14/05/2017 19:58

I think I would be worried. My little boy was 3 in February and talks in complete full sentences and is able to hold full conversations. His speech is only immature with certain sounds but I would say he has a full vocabulary and he never shuts up. I would be seeking some medical help if I was them. For example has he had his hearing checked recently?

Purplepicnic · 14/05/2017 19:58

I think at 3 it requires investigation.

Though I had a late talker and lots of people enjoyed telling me that Einstein didn't speak until he was 4

Birdsgottaf1y · 14/05/2017 19:59

I'd contact their HV, tbh.

Particularly if they aren't putting him in Nursery in September.

He's gone past the stage of it just being immature speech, he has an issue.

Tinkerbec · 14/05/2017 19:59

No he doesn't do animal noises.

Nursery were supposed to get someone in to see him but they haven't yet.

He had hearing tests at 3. All fine.

OP posts:

Ecureuil · 14/05/2017 20:00

Yes, I would certainly be worried at that age.
Did he have a 2 year check?
My oldest is 3.5 and speaks in full, complex sentences (and has for over a year). My youngest is 22 months and speaks in 3-4 word sentences. She actually does have glue ear resulting in moderate hearing loss in one ear, but thankfully I don't think it has affected her speech so far.

Seenoevil · 14/05/2017 20:00

You could literally be describing my son who is also 3.5 .. nearer to 4 though.

No words, makes a lot of noise, leads me to places, constantly smiles though, poor eye contact exspecially with strangers, doesn't respond to his name a lot of the time.

He's been diagnosed with autism, and has been for over a year. Has a full time 1:1 at pre school and has a EHCP for when he attends primary school in September.

I honestly would try and get him referred to see a pead and some speech therapy.

I also have a NT daughter who is older and she was talking by 2 and so different from my son.

BuzzKillington · 14/05/2017 20:00

Definitely a cause for concern.

toobreathless · 14/05/2017 20:01

That is late and needs to be looked into further. There may not be a problem other than the delay and he may well catch up but support needs to be put in place - he will be starting school in the next 18momths I presume, at the latest probably.

A hearing test would be a good place to start and SALT referral.

Mumzypopz · 14/05/2017 20:03

Does he have older siblings at all? This is apparently a common phenomenon for children with older siblings. I have older siblings and didn't talk until three ish, then I spoke in full sentences out of the blue, because my older siblings spoke for me most of the time.

justkeepswimmingg · 14/05/2017 20:04

I'm a great believer in that every child develops at there own rate. However that being said if my DS was 3.5 at that stage, I would go and visit the GP. It's a good idea to rule out if there is anything to be concerned about (hearing, development disorders). There's no shame in being referred for speech therapy. If it is that your DN is just a 'slow learner' or slightly delayed then they will give great advice and support to his parents, which will help encourage his speech.

Tinkerbec · 14/05/2017 20:04

Thanks.

It scares me that if he had been born earlier he would be starting school this year.

The parents are so protective he was definitely a precious first born. He is like a toddler still but 3.5

Seenoevil thanks for that I will speak to my family not sure how it will go though.

OP posts:

Spikeyball · 14/05/2017 20:07

I would be concerned. Does he go to nursery?

Tinkerbec · 14/05/2017 20:07

Mumyz no he doesn't have older siblings.

He sees my dd about twice a week who is a 9 but no older siblings at home.

OP posts:

Fruitboxjury · 14/05/2017 20:08

Definitely not something to ignore. Both my DC were speaking in sentences before 2.2 (and I thought DC2 was a late speaker) and they seem chatty but not significantly more so than other children of their age. I'm surprise nursery haven't done more, either it's not as bad as you think or they're neglecting their duty of care to him to identify possible areas where support is needed. Was anything flagged up at the 2y assessment?

Needs escalating, he will be starting school soon and the last thing you want is him feeling like he's behind other children in communication right from the start. This really needs addressing so you can make sure he's given the right support in the right environment

Tinkerbec · 14/05/2017 20:09

Today 20:07 Spikeyball

I would be concerned. Does he go to nursery?

Yes for 15 hours a week. It took a month of meltdowns to settle him.

He always goes to his parents. He only responds to us when they are not there.

OP posts:

Seenoevil · 14/05/2017 20:10

It was easier for me to see as I already had a daughter so kinda knew what was outside of the normal... and I just started noticing things with him such as when I called his name he wouldn't even turn towards me and I would literally be sat next to him!

I would ask the pre school to try and speed up someone to come and have a look at him, I got my son diagnosed really quickly as I'm a fairly pushy person and kept on.

If you have any questions feel free to ask

toobreathless · 14/05/2017 20:16

Presumably he is winter born. That is good.

Some areas have SALT drop in sessions where you just turn up to a play based environment and they very informally assess, filter off the kids who need more work or assessment and mainly just offer encouragement to most parents. Their HV should know if this is an option in their area.

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Tinseleverywhere · 14/05/2017 20:16

I would talk to the HV or GP. He may just be a late developer but it doesn't hurt to get a check up.

longlostgin · 14/05/2017 20:17

I would get a referral to a speech therapist and pay for private therapist while you are waiting

toobreathless · 14/05/2017 20:18

Do you know if there are concerns at nursery? Have you had him alone?

Because it might just be that he is absolutely FINE in that setting and this is something that is more apparent when he is with his parents.

In which case he will be fine.

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