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(16 Posts)
user15262093 Sat 13-May-17 12:51:43

Not AIBU but posting for traffic
My best friend for 15 years has been planning her wedding (which was due to take place next month). We have been on the hen do last week and everything seemed great. The wedding is organised and booked and prepared but I had a message a couple of days ago to say that she was sorry to say the wedding isn't going ahead and has been cancelled. I have sent her a couple of messages and tried ringing her but she hasn't responded which tells me that she isn't in the mood for talking (quite obviously.) I wanted to send her something to hopefully cheer her up even a teeny tiny bit. Is there anything anyone can suggest other than the usual flowers which i think might not help? Im not sure?

Shoxfordian Sat 13-May-17 12:53:23

Eek. Unfortunately I don't think there's much you can do until she's ready to talk to you. Maybe send a card saying you hope she's ok

AuntieStella Sat 13-May-17 12:59:28

I'd be tempted to send gin or wine (try Deliveroo)

But the most important thing is to be there to listen and to support when she feels ready.

Trb17 Sat 13-May-17 13:04:35

I'd maybe send a card saying that whilst she might not want to text or talk right now, you understand and you are here for her whenever she wants to talk or if she needs any help with anything.... and maybe a bottle of wine sent with the card.

emmyrose2000 Sun 14-May-17 01:51:39

Maybe​ all she wants is space right now.

Perhaps just send one last message saying you're sorry that things didn't work out and that if/when she feels like getting in touch you'll be there for her. And then step back.

DementedO1 Sun 14-May-17 02:09:10

If she's your beatt friend the best thing you can send is yourself. I can't imagine how difficult this must be for her. Maybe over to come round?

DementedO1 Sun 14-May-17 02:09:13

If she's your beatt friend the best thing you can send is yourself. I can't imagine how difficult this must be for her. Maybe over to come round?

TestingTestingWonTooFree Sun 14-May-17 04:39:32

I would contact her fairly regularly (maybe every other day) just to say you're thinking of her and there if she needs you.

NightWanderer Sun 14-May-17 05:03:29

Her friend has obviously had a bad experience and needs some space. Don't go round there and don't keep texting her. Just send one last text to say you love her and are thinking of her and to give you a call any time you want to chat. Then just back off and leave her. I wouldn't send a present to her house as she might not be there. She might be staying with her parents or gone on the honeymoon with a friend. Who knows.

Mummyoflittledragon Sun 14-May-17 05:40:07

Depending on what she likes:
Pamper kit
Cd of fave music

rightwhine Sun 14-May-17 05:49:05

A nice card with some caring words saying that you'll respect her need for solitude but that you really want to be there for her when she needs you.

Blossom789 Sun 14-May-17 06:30:42

Drop her a text to say you're going round rather than asking if she really doesn't want you to she'll text back. Take a film and food. No present will make her feel better.

picklemepopcorn Sun 14-May-17 06:43:45

Chocolate. No brainer. In every form- posh hot choc, choc biscuits, and some bars, and maybe a chocolate liqueur.

Xanadu44 Sun 14-May-17 07:00:14

Go round to her with wine, chocolate and a big hug. Sit and drink it with her and let her get everything off her chest. I would definitely appreciate that, even if I was pushing someone away, sometimes you just need your besties around you and you don't know it.

DisappearingFish Sun 14-May-17 07:22:55

Don't go round unless you really know she would want to see you!

Send her a lovely card. Tell her nothing matters except that she's made the right decision for her. Tell her you will be there when she is ready.

Tiptoethr0ughthetulips Sun 14-May-17 07:26:01

I'd get her something delivered, probably not flowers but something more comforting like wine, chocolate or nice smellies. I wouldn't actually turn up at her house though, she'll talk when ready.

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