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To not understand what autism is?

(61 Posts)
Chocolatemakesmyheartsing Sat 06-May-17 00:32:46

I am posting here for a bit of traffic and to possibly gain a little more understanding of autism and it's signs and symptoms.

I have 6 year old Dts who are both very happy and bright in their own ways, dts2 has always been a bit behind dts1 in everything walking,talking etc....They're now in year 1 and dts1 is flying through excellent with reading/writing and seems to have good friends, he behaves impeccably at school and I've never had a bad report about him, but when he's at home he's a different child, very clingy anxious has outbursts of anger very similar to that of a toddler tantrum when he's asked to do anything he doesn't want to do

Lately he's been having really bad headaches and has had a major one today which resulted in me taking him to a&e, the doctors there think it could be physiological and caused by stress so is going to refer us back to our gp with the recommendation that he sees a physiologist, but I think there is more to it than that.
With regards to dts2 he has had some major difficulty with reading and writing and has been receiving extra help at school with this.

Yesterday I went in to see his reading teacher who was previously a senco and she said that she believes he may be on the spectrum but didn't really explain to me why she believes this, as I have not noticed any behavioural issues he may have other than the usual 6 year old boy pushing his boundaries, he is a very placid easy child compared to his brother who's only real passion is dinosaurs.

So aibu to ask for some help in recognising some of the many symptoms as what dts2 teacher has said has worried me that I've been overlooking him because I'm having to deal with dts1.

fedupB2B Sat 06-May-17 00:36:23

Autism means different things to different children. A big sign is if a routine is disturbed a child may become inconsolably upset.

ohfourfoxache Sat 06-May-17 00:39:03

Marking place

I'm thoroughly ashamed to say that I don't know much about autism and have always been too afraid of offending anyone to really ask blush

cantthinkofabloodyname Sat 06-May-17 00:41:13

I didn't want to read & run, so I will do a quick post. Don't feel guilty about overlooking anything as the autistic spectrum is vast. There has been things said that the majority of people are somewhere along the autistic spectrum. I have 3 dc's, one of which has a diagnosis of classic autism and the other two are showing autistic traits.
The National Autistic Society are a good place to look for information to start with and if your dc is going down the route of assessments for autistic spectrum disorder then the charity Special Kids In The UK is great for support

Italiangreyhound Sat 06-May-17 00:41:45

OP could your son be dyslexic?

My dd struggles at school and has dyslexic tendencies.

You Mau be able to get a diagnosis for dyslexia or autism but it takes time. The school Senco should be able to provide more information.

Good luck.

Italiangreyhound Sat 06-May-17 00:42:27

Dyslexia and autistic tendencies.

fedupB2B Sat 06-May-17 00:43:21

You won't offend anyone by asking. If your child was to be diagnosed there are free courses provided that you can go on which tell you all about it and give you loads of helpful advice on how to deal with different situations and connect with your child in a way that may be more beneficial.

There's all sorts of ranges on the spectrum some are really high functioning you may not even know these people have this condition and there will be others who it's very plain to
See. You need to speak to the gp again.

It's important that your child gets the proper diagnosis so that he can receive the correct support x

BlackeyedSusan Sat 06-May-17 00:46:35

autism presents differently in different children.

generally there are difficulties in three areas (triad of impairments) which I can not remember at the moment. (communication/social understanding and... )

there are often sensory issues. hyper or hypo sensitive (or a mixture of both in one child,) to noise/smells/tastes/textures/temperature/touch/lights/otherivisual stuff.

children cna behave impecably in school and be terrible at home. this is because they mask in school. they keep it all in until they get out of school. the pop bottle analogy. school shake them up all day with the sensory overload, you take the lid off.

sometimes there is decreased eye contact.
often special interests in one thing. this may change periodically.
the tone of voice can be different. or the words used when speaking
literal thinkers. (eg keep your eye on the ball would result in them putting the ball on their eye. )
dislike of change of routine.
poor executive skills
poor perception of danger and risk taking activities
rigid routine
dislike change.
need to control things.
flapping/spinning or other repetitive movements.
not waving goodbye or asking to be picked up when small, nor pointing to objects etc nor following your gaze.
poor comunicators.

MissEDashwood Sat 06-May-17 00:49:36

I wouldn't worry about things too much, just wait to see the relevant specialists, they'll advise what they think.

ASD is quite complex, so rather than scaring yourself I would wait and find out.

We always worried that the pg & birth would have impacted DS, he had total obsessions with things that aren't really what you'd expect. He's also has support at school with comprehension, confidence & speech.

We were worried about ASD but the SEN / SED team weren't worried, so we took their lead.

I would speak to his reading teacher more as she may be able to give other relevant info to help with dr.

Do you mean psychologist?

Chocolatemakesmyheartsing Sat 06-May-17 00:51:34

Thank you for all your replies, I can barely keep my eyes open to read everything properly and be able to understand so I will read it in the morning and reply then.

Thanks again.

Chocolatemakesmyheartsing Sat 06-May-17 00:53:56

Yes MissE I did mean psychologist, sorry I'm very tired so excuse the spelling.

ExplodedCloud Sat 06-May-17 01:18:58

Autism is a spectrum of impairments that affect a child and cause them real difficulties. My child is seriously clever, funny, talented in many areas, talked early and is in mainstream education, where in many ways she's a model pupil. She is anxious, obsessive, has extreme sensitivities and food issues, few friends and finds the world very confusing. She has epic meltdowns at home.

potatoscowls Sat 06-May-17 01:44:38

I'm autistic and for me it's like I'm "wired up backwards" - no hunger cues (and eating causes exhausting sensory overloads), sensory issues and physical agitation. I have an extremely high IQ (not a stealth boast!) but it manifests itself really uselessly and i'm on course to fail all my exams...
I was hyper-compliant as a child, to the point where any minor scolding made me feel sick with fear and praying for death.

I wasn't diagnosed until after I diagnosed myself at 18 after a lifetime of being wrongly "accused" of various mental illnesses instead.

It's so different for each person, but I don't see it as an illness to be "cured". It's how i am (ALTHOUGH i am bloody irritating but that's my fault really grin )

DisorderedAllsorts Sat 06-May-17 02:33:44

JustAnotherSilentOldNumber Sat 06-May-17 02:44:34

Basically autism is diagnosed when someone has dibilitating impairments in three areas, these are called "The triads of impairments."

social imagenation
Social interaction

Now the reasons for the impairments and how they present vary wildly, but all will have impairments in the triads to get a diagnoses.

JustAnotherSilentOldNumber Sat 06-May-17 02:53:24

Some people may have more issue in one area than another, hence why it's a spectrum, so more social interaction problems than communication ones for example.

Also "high functioning" is to do with IQ and not ability to cope with life or how badly autism presents or anything like that.

There are also co morbids which have nothing to do with 'autism' as such but are grouped together with it and oftern present together, like sensory processing disorder mentioned a few posts above, with the feel and testures of stuff.

MissEDashwood Sat 06-May-17 03:31:46

Hope you get a good nights sleep flowers

Consider making a diary of behaviours etc, see if you can pinpoint triggers.

It'll help when you see psychologist too.

Chocolatemakesmyheartsing Sat 06-May-17 21:14:43

Good evening, thank you all for your replies I had a good night's sleep and jave been at a kids party all day so I'm exhausted again, no rest for the wicked at?grin

Anyway in response to itialian he definitely isn't dyslexic as i asked his reading support teacher, he was just having some trouble knowing the sounds of letters even though he knew the names since having that extra support he has come on leaps and bounds, both myself and his teacher are very pleased with his progress.

exploded what you have described sounds very much like dts1, especially the obsessive behaviour mostly towards me and the epic meltdowns. He's also taken to twiddling his hair which may be a comfort thing or something to do with being anxious.

It was actually very interesting to watch them both today at the party, it was another set of twins who are in their class at school, dts2 went straight in played all the games and was speaking to everyone yet dts1 was stuck to me like glue, holding my hand whilst playing games always looking at me on the bouncy castle like he was waiting for me to approve what he was doing.

I will be calling my gp on Monday to take them both to see if I can get some sort of assessment whilst waiting for the psychologist appointment.

ohfourfoxache Sat 06-May-17 21:44:47

Sorry to butt in again, but can I ask about the triad?

If someone has difficulties in 1/2 areas but not all 3, is this what is referred to as on the spectrum without necessarily having a formal diagnosis?

smu06set Sat 06-May-17 21:51:46

Beware chocolate there are long wait lists for diagnosis, we had to wait nearly 2 years!

ohfour if they only struggle in one or two of the triads then they have autistic tendencies but not enough for diagnosis.

PolterGoose Sat 06-May-17 22:02:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chocolatemakesmyheartsing Sat 06-May-17 22:04:58

sum0 yes I'm aware of that hopefully I can just get the ball rolling and with help from the school I'm sure we will get there whatever the outcome.

wobblywonderwoman Sat 06-May-17 22:08:55

Just to help people - ASD is now referred to the dyad of impairments and we no longer refer to aspergers. It is list all autism - but on a spectrum.

Sensory impairment are now on the criteria for diagnosis as opposed to the previous criteria (this is significant)

giddypig Sat 06-May-17 22:13:43

I would go back to the teacher, or the existing SENCO and ask for more info.

Unless they're like the teacher I used to work with, who referred to her students as "Naughty auties" and thought they were just badly behaved "wrong 'uns" (in the staff room, not the classroom).

PolterGoose Sat 06-May-17 22:16:58

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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