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Private ballet lessons WWYD.

(21 Posts)
Lonelymummyof1 Sun 30-Apr-17 18:07:48

DD 3 dreams of being a ballerina, but has v complex health problems.
After 20 months in hospital she started ballet about 8 weeks ago and she loves it.
The teacher has been amazing with and despite daughter having numerous tubes is so confident with daughter.
Unfortuntly we had to pull DD out of ballet more for the other 3 year olds on the class.
I emailed the ballet school to say she would not be coming back.
I then emailed her ballet teacher to say thankyou.
Her ballet teacher then emailed me back with an lovely message to say that if she still wanted to do ballet then she will give her 1-1 free of charge.
( genuinly lovely )
Now I feel guilty she starts next thursday and I feel like I should pay her something.
My friend says that if she really does not want payment that its more offensive to push her to take money for something she really wants to do ?

Kiwi32 Sun 30-Apr-17 18:12:41

If she's offered free I would start off under
that basis maybe under summer hols? If your daughter is still loving it and she isn't in a position to rejoin the main class maybe discuss payment going forward and get a nice gift to thank for classes to date.

Kiwi32 Sun 30-Apr-17 18:13:04


skerrywind Sun 30-Apr-17 18:25:34

Sounds lovely.

You could offer to gift something to the ballet school?

Foldedtshirt Sun 30-Apr-17 18:35:46

How lovely. In the past I've given Waitrose vouchers when payment has been rejected or was inappropriate (Godmother doing EP assessment, teacher driving dcs to school everyday)
They can be used to buy treats or essentials. Or even cashed in!

Foldedtshirt Sun 30-Apr-17 18:37:33

But the most important thing is the accept her offer! She really is only offering because she enjoyed teaching your DD.

nancy75 Sun 30-Apr-17 18:37:48

Can you afford the normal fee for private lessons? If you can I would say that I wanted to pay it. If she is just doing it as a one off I think it's fine but I would feel I was taking advantage if it was for free every week

sooperdooper Sun 30-Apr-17 18:39:30

Can't you just offer what you'd have been paying for the normal classes?

nancy75 Sun 30-Apr-17 18:40:39

I'm guessing a private lesson is about £30 an hour, offering group lesson rate (£6/7?) would seem worse to me

CaulkheadNorth Sun 30-Apr-17 18:44:16

I would check her/the schools insurance covers her to offer free classes. I think it's a genuinely lovely thing to do, but it's worth checking I feel.

Foldedtshirt Sun 30-Apr-17 18:45:45

Seriously Caulk?!
Don't OP, just accept the lovely offer.

HalfCarrot Sun 30-Apr-17 18:46:22

Don't offer normal group fee that's definitely worse

WellNowWhat Sun 30-Apr-17 18:49:15

I'd perhaps offer to pay the studio/hall hire fee. Unless the teacher owns the space she will likely be paying for the time your daughter is there.

SpitefulMidLifeAnimal Sun 30-Apr-17 19:36:35

Perhaps the school supports a particular charity? if so, you could make a donation in their name.

ScissorBow Sun 30-Apr-17 19:43:15

She offered something without you asking so it was genuinely from the heart. What could you give her in return that is genuinely from the heart? Money wouldn't cut it. I'm thinking something from your daughter like a picture she drew of the teacher and her. Or sending her a video of your daughter copying something that the teacher would do/say to show what an impact she's made on her. Or write her a letter dictated (as far as it can be) by your daughter talking about her dreams of being a ballerina and how the teacher is helping her to do that. Those things are priceless. You obviously have a very wonderful daughter if the teacher is prepared to teach her for free flowers

rumblingDMexploitingbstds Sun 30-Apr-17 20:44:52

Please don't feel bad about accepting. I do similar teaching and have gifted tuition when I've been able to for families doing their best in tough circumstances or a child who would really benefit. I love my job and I love being able to give something back. If your little dd would enjoy it then after twenty months in hospital she flipping well deserves a little special attention.

ZebraOwl Sun 30-Apr-17 20:48:57


This = third try at posting due to MN random!reloadings. And my hands really don't want to play atm.

So: y/y to asking about studio hire + personal gift/card of some kind.

Maybe look into Flamingo Chicks if in [right bit of] UK:

Ballet can = fab for people with complex health needs as safely-gradually building muscle, core stability, bone mass, proprioception... and self-confidence, of course.

I hope this is the start of a long & happy ballet "career" (not necessarily in the sense of her becoming a professional) for your DD. flowers

Lonelymummyof1 Sun 30-Apr-17 21:12:03

Thankyou, I do not want to turn up empty handed and feel like she feels pressured to give her ballet lessons.

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett Sun 30-Apr-17 21:15:45

But why would she feel under pressure? If she offered freely she offered freely - it was a lovely thing for her to do. Can you perhaps accept for now with the intention of working towards re-integrating her into the normal class? So it's just a short-term thing?

Babypassport Sun 30-Apr-17 21:17:11

I've given free lessons before and seeing the pleasure the student got from them was better than any payment! I'm sure she wouldn't feel pressured into offering if she didn't want to.

DebbieFiderer Sun 30-Apr-17 21:54:27

I agree with finding out if the school have a charity they support (or if the teacher does) and doing some fundraising for them.

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