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Pregnancy hormones or justifiable anger

(20 Posts)
pinyata Sat 29-Apr-17 23:21:26

I am 8 months pregnant and ever so slight hormonal but I don't feel I aibu

DP has spent the day with FIL, MIL and DPBF in there local pub I happily stayed home and binged watched Netflix caught up with the house work

DPBF was asking if we have decided on a name for Bump which we have but decided not to tell anybody

We had previously told MIL the name we have chosen and told her this was a secret , She then proceeded to "guess" baby's name in front of DPBF and when DP said that wasn't the name rather than playing along decided to "out us" so to speak and say that's what we had told her and then for the rest of the night referred to bump by the name we had chosen telling all there friends in the pub the name along with DPBF

DP has came home and told me this He doesn't think it's a big deal but I am raging his only response was that my own mother hadn't spoke to me in a month because we have fell out over a different issue now am livid at him as well angryAIBU ?

Wolfiefan Sat 29-Apr-17 23:24:08

It's a secret but you told her?
Maybe you gave her the impression it wasn't all that big a secret. If it is then tell no one!

BlackeyedSusan Sat 29-Apr-17 23:25:59

ah well, she does not get to be the first with any other news then. shot herself in the foot there.

pinyata Sat 29-Apr-17 23:26:32

We told both her and my mum and when we told her advised it was in confidence and said we weren't telling anybody else she promised she wouldn't tell a soul

Wolfiefan Sat 29-Apr-17 23:27:18

But they were all drinking. Was she drunk?
I wouldn't share news I wanted to keep private.

LovingLola Sat 29-Apr-17 23:28:24

Who is DPBF???

pinyata Sat 29-Apr-17 23:30:17

Partners Best Friend - I might have made that abbreviation up blush

user1488721675 Sat 29-Apr-17 23:31:02

Maybe it was just one too many sherberts & a bit giddy about her new grandchild. It's not worth getting angry about, if it was meant to be a secret than don't tell anyone.

ymmv Sat 29-Apr-17 23:32:55

It's always a risk if you share a secret.

I'd be pissed off tho and threaten not to inform of the birth.

pinyata Sat 29-Apr-17 23:34:29

Yeah am starting to think I might be slightly over reacting we only shared this news with both mothers to make them feel involved and part of the pregnancy

Jakeyboy1 Sat 29-Apr-17 23:36:16

I'd be fuming.

Allthewaves Sat 29-Apr-17 23:42:41

if u wanted it a secret u shouldn't have told anyone

Justmadeperfectflapjacks Sat 29-Apr-17 23:46:21

Note to self to keep quiet about anything else from now on. .

WorraLiberty Sat 29-Apr-17 23:56:32

Is it secret-worthy because you don't want anyone to know what sex your baby is, until after the birth?

pinyata Sat 29-Apr-17 23:59:11

No we're having a girl we just didn't want to tell everybody encase we got reactions from people that put us off ... am still angry but more at myself for telling her in the first place

WorraLiberty Sun 30-Apr-17 00:32:18

I get you're annoyed that she blabbed a secret.

But I don't get why anyone would think naming a kid is secret-worthy.

People will have opinions on the name both before and after the birth. It's really not a big deal and if you both like the name, no-one should be able to put you off it.

sailorcherries Sun 30-Apr-17 04:15:24

OH and I decided not to tell our baby's name to anyone, purely because of judgemental parents.

Apparently at NYE OH got pishes as a fart and told either one of his siblings or friends. They then tols OHs parents.

We then told everyone else as it's not really life or death. Yes we have had some shitty comments from certain family members about not liking the name, and as usual my response is "well best get cracking and you can use (insert name they want) on your next child", even to my mum. This tends to shut her up.

I don't think anyone done anything wrong OP. As it's been pointed out she was probably a bit tipsy and excited.

TestingTestingWonTooFree Sun 30-Apr-17 06:20:36

I'd be pissed off, but it's not the end of the world. You've had a useful demo that mil can't be trusted with secrets. More of a concern is your partner's lack of support when you're upset.

Johno85 Sun 30-Apr-17 06:37:13

100% get where you're coming from. No it's not the biggest secret in the world but you wanted to keep the name to yourselves for your own reasons, no one can judge you on that. Like you said you wanted to keep both mum's involved and they've mucked that up a bit despite probably just being excited and on the sauce. My parents live abroad and we told them we were expecting before 12 weeks but didn't want them to tell anyone. Same with my in-laws; next thing you know all of their friends and clients know, but that's ok because they don't know us personally (fml). Being annoyed at them, went to being annoyed at myself and now I've learned a lesson. If they ever feel left out about not knowing something I can gently remind them why! Good luck on the home stretch x

ferriswheel Sun 30-Apr-17 09:01:01

Yes it was a secret but yes I'd be pissed off. Very, very pissed off.

Maybe you could tell us the name and we could think of a similar alternative? Then you'd still get to have a secret name.

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