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To start deleting these wedding pics?

(438 Posts)
JonSnowsWhore Sat 29-Apr-17 18:48:49

This is soooo outing but I don't know any other way of putting it.

5 weeks ago, I did the photography for an old friends wedding. I don't have a photography business but I did photography in college as an adult so she knows I do it cheaply to help out people I know. Before this wedding I hadn't seen her for a couple of years btw & wouldn't have been close enough to be invited to the wedding which is fine.

The wedding ended up being brought forward to when I'd still be pregnant, so I asked another photography keen friend of mine if she'd come & help me out as I knew I'd struggle doing a whole day at 7 months pregnant. Said we'd split the money between us & she said great as she'd love the experience.

So we get there at 10.30am, do the getting ready photos, horse & carriage photos, go to venue & do ceremony, group & couple photos, get a break for the food, then back again for the speeches, some of the party, cutting cake & first dance, eventually leave about 8.30pm. Bride said she'd pay me by bank transfer the next day & as I know her, I was fine with that.

Sent her my bank details the next day, got an excuse that their online banking was playing up, they'd go to a branch on the Monday to pay it. Monday morning I see on Facebook that they're setting off to their honeymoon in the uk. Don't hear anything. Midweek another message, there's no English banks so they'll do it as soon as they come back from honeymoon. I'm a bit pissed off now as it's not just me going without, I'm meant to give my other friend half. Since then it's been an excuse about their car breaking down, this money issue that money issue, can she pay me half & then the other half at the end of the month (now) so I say if that's all she can do then we'll have to do that, as I felt bad that my other friend hadn't been paid yet. She never paid the half, & never replied to my message. Now it's the end of the month, 5 weeks since the wedding & we still haven't had any money.

So, WIBU to start deleting her bloody wedding photos, what should I say to her as I'm getting bloody pissed off now, at first I didn't want to demand money as she was a 'friend' & didn't want to make things awkward, but can clearly see now that she doesn't give a shit about making things awkward!

elephantscansing Sat 29-Apr-17 18:50:06

How crap!
Take her to small claims court instead.

Keep the photos - that way you still have them as bargaining chips and can prove you did a good job on them.

DrinkFeckArseGirls Sat 29-Apr-17 18:50:30

Yeo, friednship's gine. I'd take her to small claims court too.

JonSnowsWhore Sat 29-Apr-17 18:50:45

Wedding was an hours drive each way aswell so I'm already out of pocket for the bloody petrol!

Mamabear14 Sat 29-Apr-17 18:51:27

I would send her a message and clearly state that if she hasn't paid in full by end of day Tuesday you and your friend will be deleting all of her photos. Don't send her a thing. If she doesn't pay then absolutely delete them.

JonSnowsWhore Sat 29-Apr-17 18:52:27

The amount of money I was charging her for a whole days photography plus all pics free on a disc was nothing compared to what it'd cost to take to court. I'm 8 months pregnant I can't be arsed, I'd rather just show her up for being a right arse tbh

fairgame84 Sat 29-Apr-17 18:53:08

I wonder if she's waiting to see how good the photos are that the guests have taken before committing to paying you.
I would give her a deadline like Mamabear suggests.

Justmadeperfectflapjacks Sat 29-Apr-17 18:53:27

Give her a final request stating pics will be deleted at midnight on that date.
And do it.

SittingAround1 Sat 29-Apr-17 18:54:26

Have you given her the photos yet? If not don't.
You could also contact the groom and ask for the money, saying that his wife hasn't replied and you're out of pocket.

harderandharder2breathe Sat 29-Apr-17 18:54:40

Give her a last warning that if she doesn't pay on Tuesday (working day so no bank related excuses) you will take her to small claims court. And then follow through with it.

You've done the work, you deserve to be paid!

ImperialBlether Sat 29-Apr-17 18:55:14

Look up the small claims court - that shouldn't be expensive.

DoItTooJulia Sat 29-Apr-17 18:55:15

What a weird way to behave-because you have her wedding photos!! If she doesn't pay, she doesn't get them!

It's bloody rude, a right cheek and not on at all.

I'd send one last message along the lines of 'well, this is really shit. You haven't paid me-you still owe me £x and half of that is for the other photographer. You obviously don't want your photos, which will be deleted if I haven't received the full amount by xxx date. Pity, because there are some really beautiful ones'

I'd be livid. But I bet there'll be some really clever and witty MNetters along soon with an awesome text/email you can send.
'flowers'

GlitteryFluff Sat 29-Apr-17 18:56:09

I agree with a final message with a deadline.
Shitty of them.

kali110 Sat 29-Apr-17 18:56:13

Don't give her the photos.
She's no friend of yours either, sorry op.
If she was really struggling for money she could have spoken to you. She's doing her utmost to get out of paying.
Do not give in! ( she will blatenly say you are a bad friend/photographer etc but they are in the wrong!)

JonSnowsWhore Sat 29-Apr-17 18:56:21

This is the thing, she also had a videographer so can always get the stills off of them, but why bloody bother asking me to do her actual photos just to mess me about! She knew the whole day that i was in pain (the start of spd) but I got through 10 hours of photography because I didn't want to let her down. I'd rather have not
Bloody gone if she didn't want my pics

ExplodedCloud Sat 29-Apr-17 18:56:58

Small claims court is vaffordable though. Less than £40 for under £1k

CatsRidingRollercoasters Sat 29-Apr-17 18:57:08

What a freeloader she is! Yes, I would give her a deadline of maybe 2 weeks at which point (give a specific time) the photos will be deleted?

I wish you were my mate - we paid an arm and a leg for our wedding pictures! She is taking advantage of your (now expired) friendship.

Oysterbabe Sat 29-Apr-17 18:57:32

It costs very little to take someone to court if it's a small claim. It's incredibly easy, you can even submit the claim form to the court online.

Honeybee79 Sat 29-Apr-17 18:57:36

Shit behaviour! But don't delete the photos - they're your bargaining chip as she's hound to want them.

Look into money claims online. It's a fairly hassle free way of getting judgment for a debt but if she's not got the money you will struggle to enforce a court order against her.

Definitely keep hold of the photos!

Cocolepew Sat 29-Apr-17 18:57:58

Don't threaten to delete them , she could have photos from guests and might not care.
You need to get her to pay, small claims is probably best bet.

JonSnowsWhore Sat 29-Apr-17 18:58:32

Oh she's not getting the pics! I've looked at them but I've not started editing them as why should I put a minutes more work into something I haven't been paid for?

GlamClam Sat 29-Apr-17 18:59:17

Send a letter telling her to pay by a certain date or you will be taking her to small claims court.

And keep all communication in writing from now on.

She's done a shit thing and shouldn't get away with it. (In future charge upfront unless it's a very good friend)

JonSnowsWhore Sat 29-Apr-17 19:00:28

The pics from her guests are kind of side on pics of the pics we were taking if that makes sense, so nothing compared to the real thing, we don't have guests standing around us while we were taking the proper pics, I wouldn't have let them anyway as it's unprofessional, especially if there's kids in the photos, the people would be looking in 5 different directions if there were more cameras

victoriousblunder Sat 29-Apr-17 19:00:36

Don't delete them, you may still be paid & maybe she really is struggling and embarrassed.
You definitely deserve to be paid for your work, of course you do! But these are her WEDDING pictures and I really don't think it is nice to delete them.
I hope you get your money op.

CheeseandGherkins Sat 29-Apr-17 19:01:17

Tell her that if she hasn't paid by x date then you will have no choice but to take her to the small claims court. That may make her cough up. She clearly isn't interested in the photos.

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