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to think if your neighbour take a parcel in for you...

(107 Posts)
Rainbowdash88 Fri 28-Apr-17 11:25:40

The least you could do is make an effort to come and collect it asap?

I am currently a SAHM and live in a small quiet cul de sac, where apart from my other elderly neighbour, I am the only one who is normally at home most days with the DC.

Normally if anyone gets a delivery and no one is at home, the driver (mainly the same woman who usually delivers my orders) will come and knock at my house.

Now I don't have an issues with taking in parcels for people as I understand people work, so I take them in with the though process of
1) Its the neighbourly thing to do
2) It saves the driver, who I happen to spend time chatting with, and Is a lovely woman, from having to re-deliver on another day
3) it saves neighbours the hassle of re-arranging delivery.

Each time I've took a parcel in depending on which neighbour it is, they usually get home, see card and call straight over, or I've caught them as they've pulled up in the street, However NDN on the other side of me makes zero effort to call to collect their stuff. I have on occasion either popped ND and dropped it off, or caught them in the street but once when DS was poorly & I took a package in, I made no effort to drop it off for them and it took them 2 days before they called for it without so much as a thanks! (they had been home during this time an no doubt would of see the card the driver pushed through the door stating it was at mine).

Fast forward to today and DH was working from home when another package arrived for NDN, he signed for it, took it in and watched the lady post the card through the door. NDN is due in soon and I know they wont collect it until they can be arsed, which means I have a huge bloody box stuck in my hall until they do.

AIBU to now just start refusing to take anything in for them or to tell them to move their arse in terms of collecting their stuff because if I have to answer "mummy what's in the box?" one more time I'll bloody scream!

halcyondays Fri 28-Apr-17 11:27:12

You don't always get the card. In our street if you take in a parcel for a neighbour, you take it over to them when they come back home.

Botanicbaby Fri 28-Apr-17 11:28:59

YANBU just stop taking their parcels in future if they can't be arsed to collect them.

iseenodust Fri 28-Apr-17 11:31:09

Round here the neighour would come and collect pretty much as soon as they were in. I'm with you on being neighbourly and can empathise as I often work from home. I would start refusing to take theirs as they have form for leaving you with their packages and no word of thanks.

Gatehouse77 Fri 28-Apr-17 11:34:07

Wouldn't bother me in the slightest how long they took to collect it but the lack of manners to say thank you would!

Redcrayons Fri 28-Apr-17 11:39:48

Round here, you take the parcel over when you notice they've come back. However, we have a new neighbour who waits for you to collect. It has caused quite a stir, let me tell you.

Chloe84 Fri 28-Apr-17 11:44:29


You don't always get the card. In our street if you take in a parcel for a neighbour, you take it over to them when they come back home.

OP has said quite clearly that on both occasions she saw the driver post a card through the letter box.

But you managed to be the first to post, so well done.

@OP, you are fully justified in longer accepting any further parcels. Being neighbourly does not mean being a mug.

GuinessPunch Fri 28-Apr-17 11:46:36

You should go collect the your parcel from the neighbour not vice versa. Sometimes I ignore the door. Get it delivered to your work if you are not going to be there!

bibbitybobbityyhat Fri 28-Apr-17 11:49:02

Gosh that was long!

Yanbu to refuse to take any more parcels in for that neighbour.

PeaFaceMcgee Fri 28-Apr-17 11:50:08

Leave the parcel where it is and see how long it takes them to collect. Do not cave! This is only way to break the cycle now.

If it's annoying in the future then decline parcels for that particular neighbour.

SapphireStrange Fri 28-Apr-17 11:51:03

I take in parcels for the neighbours and I don't care how long it takes them to come and collect them. It's skin off their nose, not mine.

Rainbowdash88 Fri 28-Apr-17 11:52:09

halcyondays I can understand that as a reason regarding no calling card being left, however the driver in question always fills out the card whilst stood chatting to me and then will go pop it through the door before saying bye and then going off to her next drop off.

Usually it wouldn't bother me, especially with smaller packages/boxes that I can put out of the way of the DC to stop them getting their little hands on them/ damaging them, its when its stuff that are a fair size that aren't as easy to shift out of the way that it gets annoying after a day or 2 of it being in your house. Also the lack of thanks on the last occasion pissed me off big time.

I just don't get why, if knowing a parcel that you're waiting for, is literally next door why wait so long to collect it. confused

GardeningWithDynamite Fri 28-Apr-17 11:52:34

If you know they've got the card then it's a bit galling if they haven't come to collect for days.

Before you stop taking in parcels for them, do you think they'd take it on board if you mentioned that you'd been waiting for them to come and collect next time it happens? Maybe one last chance?

NatureIsAWhore Fri 28-Apr-17 11:56:26

This wouldn't bother me at all.

But I'm curious of what your conversation was during exchange? I'm trying to figure out how he could not have said thanks. Surely... 'do you have my parcel?'... 'here you go'..... 'thanks'. Or did he just wander off when you handed it to him?

Starlighter Fri 28-Apr-17 12:01:40

I'm guilty of this! I'm just so on the go with the kids, I often forget to collect my parcels as soon as I get home. My lovely neighbours offen bring them over for me. Maybe they're fed up with my parcels in their way too! Oops! shock

I'll try to do better! blush

Louiselouie0890 Fri 28-Apr-17 12:05:46

I was in the same situation. SAHM delivery drivers clocked onto it and I'd end up with about ten parcels. I didn't mind too much but when neighbours started putting notes to delivery drivers saying leave parcel at my house without asking which peed me off. I don't do it anymore.

Foldedtshirt Fri 28-Apr-17 12:07:49

I agonise over when's a good time to collect, particularly if the neighbour has tiny dcs. Swap phone numbers so you can text to say oi come and get it?

Botanicbaby Fri 28-Apr-17 12:08:05

Oh gosh lack of thanks, definitely don't take their parcels in next time.

Even if they don't have a card from driver most places send a text or email to let you know it's been delivered. So I'd say the onus is on them to come round to get it as soon as they can.

When I had neighbours I remember going round to collect my parcel not long after moving there. Neighbour knew where I lived as she'd seen me in garden. I walked up her drive, knocked on door and she looked at me as if I'd just landed on earth from the moon! I smiled and said you have my parcel. Then she handed it over giving me a puzzled look as if she'd not been expecting anyone to collect a parcel confused

EssentialHummus Fri 28-Apr-17 12:13:32

Just don't take any more for him. This is all about give and take; if one side is taking the p you don't need to indulge them.

I know it's not the case here, but round my way the Amazon delivery men never leave a card, so we rely on the neighbour coming round with the item.

HotelEuphoria Fri 28-Apr-17 12:14:04

if I take a parcel in for a neighbour I don't wait for them to collect, I wait until I see a sign of life and then drop it off. CBA with having random boxes in the hall. They do the same for me, or they will just leave in in their porch and I collect it when I get home. Don't even need to knock they just leave it for me there.

frieda909 Fri 28-Apr-17 12:19:33

I've had the opposite problem. I had to start writing 'do not leave with neighbours' as part of my address, because once my neighbours took in a parcel it could be weeks before I'd actually get hold of it. I lived in a block with mostly elderly people, and they'd either not hear the door or would choose not to answer most of the time.

I'd much rather just collect the parcel from the delivery office myself!

morningconstitutional2017 Fri 28-Apr-17 12:26:58

Yes, of course. If you can make the effort to take a parcel in they could make the effort to collect it as promptly as they can.
However, as they've shown that they can't be bothered I'd tell the postie that I can't accept parcels for them in future. Then they can make their own arrangements either for re-delivery or collection from their depot.

Rainbowdash88 Fri 28-Apr-17 12:27:02

NatureIsAWhore the collection convo went

him (hold up card) "hi, is my package here?"
me " hi, yep, 2minute!"(hands over box)
him (takes package) "great! see you later!"
no actual thanks unless he assumed the "great" part was in fact a way of saying thanks?

Starlighter I'd completely understand in your case with DC as I know myself how hectic life is with small DC that a parcel could possibly be the least of your worries, however NDN's are older with grown DC at home. I'll see how long it takes them to collect today and try mentioning it that if in future they would like me to take stuff in, that they try and collect it a bit sooner, don't want to be THAT arsey NDN but my assumption always was, that if a neighbour takes something in for you, the courteous thing to do is actually go and collect from them as soon as you can after noticing you've missed a delivery, and to thank them.

obviously I've taken stuff to neighbours in the past and haven't or wouldn't have thought nothing of it but Redcrayons is the stir with new neighbour because they don't do the dropping off?
Is it possible that they think "why should I been inconvenienced as such to have to deliver it to them once they already know where its at?"

katronfon Fri 28-Apr-17 12:41:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Redcrayons Fri 28-Apr-17 12:42:32

OP - Yes, the newneighbour keeps hold of the parcel till you come and get it. if you don't get the card, then I don't know where it is without phoning the company to complain about non delivery.

Everyone else drops it off. It's only a small cul de sac, so it's really no effort to do it.
Obviously, we'll just tut and never mention it.

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