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PIL Next Door

(76 Posts)
MrBonkers Mon 24-Apr-17 14:45:04

This is more a question about how you would feel if your PIL/parents moved in next door. This situation occurred to friends of ours a few years ago after the house next door to them went on the market. They became aware that the wifes parents had also put their house on the market but didn't put two and two together until the new "neighbours" actually moved in.

Sounds weird to me but fortunately our friends are pretty laid back and coped (up to a point), they moved a few miles away about 4 years later.

Could you cope or would you be getting the estate agents in pronto?

Joinourclub Mon 24-Apr-17 14:46:00

Omg no

xStefx Mon 24-Apr-17 14:47:02

I would have moved pronto just so the sneaky bastards didn't get away with their game!!
" Oh you should have told us, if you had we would have mentioned we were actually thinking of moving ourselves"

Twooter Mon 24-Apr-17 14:47:27

I would hate it.

Huldra Mon 24-Apr-17 14:48:20

I would think it very very odd if my parents were going to move in next door and didn't mention it.

The only nice explanation is that they thought it would be a funny surprise for their daughter.

Pinkheart5915 Mon 24-Apr-17 14:49:33

We have no neighbours just fields grin but I honestly wouldn't mind it at all, I've only mil now as fil passed away.

Mil only lives 10 minutes drive away and We see her most days, my babies love seeing her and she loves watching them while I go for my run/hair cut and the occasional overnight while me & dh go out

AdoraBell Mon 24-Apr-17 14:49:56

I would have to move. Luckily it will never happen.

Primaryteach87 Mon 24-Apr-17 14:50:46

I would expect it to be a joint decision that it was desirable for us and parents/in laws. How weird to just do it without consulting!

KarmaKit Mon 24-Apr-17 14:52:41

I would hate it. Not because I hate my PIL - they are ok people. Just because I'd hate living next door to family. I adore my parents and I'd hate living next door to them too!

ElsieMc Mon 24-Apr-17 14:54:38

We lived very near PIL and SIL. It didn't really bother me at first, but it soon did. FIL had a key and I always remember hearing his footsteps on the stairs when we were in bed together. His sister would "borrow" my clothes, sometimes before I had even worn them. They would help themselves to stuff from our fridge. I would get in from work to find eggs gone. To add insult to injury, they would then ask me to get their shopping for them the next day when I couldn't drive and had to get the bus home!

The house was in need of full renovation but they still gave dh a list of ridiculous jobs other relatives wanted doing regularly. I don't mean urgent work either. Once he rewired his uncle's large house and they gave us a rusting washing machine (which I found leaked) as a "thank you" or rather an f-off. He made no charge for the rewire.

Needless to say we moved after just 12 months.

NerrSnerr Mon 24-Apr-17 14:55:03

We've had a bungalow behind our house on the market. We have been concerned my inlaws would want to buy it. They are 90 minutes away, I wouldn't mind them being closer but not in a house where they can see us through the windows.

comedycentral Mon 24-Apr-17 14:56:53

I would love it! They are nice people x

CMamaof4 Mon 24-Apr-17 14:58:23

I would move asap

Judashascomeintosomemoney Mon 24-Apr-17 14:58:45

Funnily enough I'd rather my MIL next door than my own parents. MIL is easy going and would give us space whereas my DM would be in and out every two minutes!

Stormwhale Mon 24-Apr-17 15:00:00

My own parents wouldn't bother me as they would leave me alone unless invited. My pils... oh Mary mother of God no. They would be round every bloody day and I would feel trapped and claustrophobic and a million other negative feelings.

ChicRock Mon 24-Apr-17 15:00:07

I wouldn't mind living next door to my FIL.

But I think the crux of it is, any parents that only announce they're moving in next door, on the day they actually move, are likely to be nightmare in-laws anyway.

The scenario in the OP indicates a strained or difficult relationship.

flumpybear Mon 24-Apr-17 15:01:06

Bloody hell no way!!! Not even if it's a detached house!!

TotalPineapple Mon 24-Apr-17 15:01:54

PIL I wouldn't mind, if it were my mother my house would be on the market the next day.

Seriously weird to do it in secret though.

onalongsabbatical Mon 24-Apr-17 15:07:18

Jaysus, that's beyond weird. Not telling them? They have got to be the PILS from hell to do that. What were they thinking?
Hey, this'll be fun - wait till we see the look on DCs face!

BeyondThePage Mon 24-Apr-17 15:07:34

We'd be fine with it, it is something we are going to have to look into in the not too distant future anyhow to be honest, as MIL is in the early stages of dementia. Rather next door than across the landing!

Gottagetmoving Mon 24-Apr-17 15:08:47

It depends on the people concerned.
Some families get on well and support each other and can communicate and others can't.
There will be just as many pils who would hate having their children, SIL or DIL living next door as there are children dreading their parents doing the same.

Hassled Mon 24-Apr-17 15:08:58

I actually don't think they'd mind and as they're getting more infirm and live in the middle of nowhere it would be quite reassuring to have them next door. They'd keep themselves to themselves unless strictly necessary - so much is going to depend on the individuals.

londonfever Mon 24-Apr-17 15:11:38

I honestly would not want either my DPs or DPILs moving in next door.

Katedotness1963 Mon 24-Apr-17 15:11:42

I've managed to keep an ocean between me and my in laws for the best part of 30 years. I have no desire to change that. Next door? Nightmare!

Beelzebop Mon 24-Apr-17 15:13:12

No way. X

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