DM has a seizure disorder, takes them frequently and sometimes in public (bus , shopping centre etc). It's not epilepsy , has a psychological cause and can't be controlled by medication. Last night she had one in a local restaurant (cheap chain place) & manager came over to help me. I've been DM's carer since I was a child so very used to it.
Anyway last night lady near to us was sitting watching and asked me how long exactly DM had been fitting for. Said she knew a little bit about fits and why wasn't I giving her rescue medication? I said we didn't have any, but we were fine thanks and nothing to worry about.
She seemed rather put out and started explaining to me how very important it is not to leave the house without rescue meds and she knows a bit about these things , I must make sure to take them with me etc. I didn't want to explain mum's medical history to her as no idea if she was a Dr, nurse or just had a friend with epilepsy or something. So again I said, honestly we're fine but thank you for your advice .
She continued to watch and offered to assist me again - I said thank you but no, we are fine.. She seemed offended and finally turned her back to us.
Manager made some sort of comment about unwanted advice and leaving people alone, which she must have heard.
I feel a bit bad now , not many people are very willing to help in these situations and it must be hard to know what to say or do - hard for me to come up with answers when people ask what I want them to do as realistically the answer is 'very little', there's nothing anyone can do iyswim.
Did I handle it right? Perhaps I didn't come across as very grateful for her help but I was unsure of what to say whilst protecting mum's privacy. I'm quite socially anxious/unconfident and worried she must have thought all sorts, her face was like thunder when I said we didn't have any medication to hand ..
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Unsocilisted advice - was I bu?
16 replies
shouldnthavesaid1 · 23/04/2017 08:02
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