My DH had debt issues that revealed themselves before we got married that sparked some trust issues but we worked through them. A year post wedding,
5k new debt came out of the woodwork (third of it fees alone for not paying back the expensive things he'd bought for his hobby on his credit card as he was paying half of our expensive holidays and was too ashamed to tell me he couldn't afford it).
DH is currently paying off his total £7k left of debt and I have full visibility of accounts if I require access and he is paying back agreed amounts on time monthly.
However As a result, we cannot afford to go on holiday this year at all, and there's no point me going on my own. I've travelled with friends a bit last year and it already raised questions with family and friends as to why I was holidaying separately from my husband.
Other than his shit money management, he's fab.
We are wanting to ttc but my safety instinct has kicked in that says he needs to clear debt first. I have the opposite money issues to him in that I'm petrified of never having enough savings.
AIBU to just want to scream IT'S NOT FAIR!! YOUR STUPID HOBBY HAS PUT OUR LIFE ON HOLD AND OUR PLAN TO START A
FAMILY AND/OR GO ON ADVENTURES HAS BEEN DELAYED BECAUSE OF YOUR STUPID SPENDING DECISIONS. I DIDN'T DECIDE TO SPEND MONEY WE DIDN'T HAVE YET I SUFFER AS MUCH AS YOU BECAUSE OF IT.
Safe to say, said hobby is now abandoned until debt is cleared.
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AIBU?
To feel horrible and yet right about DH debt, holidays and ttc
115 replies
Fourbyfour · 22/04/2017 23:07
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