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AIBU?

Car accident. So confused??? Looking for reassure for my dad.

93 replies

Daughter96 · 19/04/2017 14:21

About 2 weeks ago my parents and brother were involved in a car accident, their care was totalled in the accident. Everyone was generally banged up but nothing serious, however, the other driver received a dislocated shoulder.
My dad has taken it very badly, he was in shock for a while after and now incredible down because he is worried about what will happen.
From what my parents and brother say, my dad was pulling out into a road that has a mini roundabout, he looked but saw nothing coming. This road is a bit dangerous as it has a bit of a blind spot as the road from where other car came is blocked by parked cars on either side of the road.
Half way round this mini roundabout a car came out of nowhere it slammed on the breaks even though he did break as there are two massive skid marks on the road, he still hit my dads car spinning it around and pushed it across the road. It hit the car between the drivers and back passengers door which made it spin round. I don't want to say what the make of my dad or the other car is but my dad's car is an estate car and very heavy and the other car was smaller and lighter, which suggest, to me, that the other car was going too fast.
Anyway, while this happened my brother, managed to get hold of my grandparent who came down and helped. my Granda took the car camera down ready to give to the police when they came. However, the women behind the other car was an off-duty police officer, states she saw the accident and it was my dad's fault. Because of this my grandad refused to give her the camera as she was now a witness and she shouldnt have anything to do with the evidence. (my grandad is an ex-policemen so understood procedure)
The off-duty policewomen then went around telling all other witnesses that it was my dads fault and she was a policewoman, my mum seems to think this was very unprofessional and hindered them getting witnesses. ( my mum is also an ex policewoman)
So now my dad is in a state, will not eat or talk, determined he will lose his license and be unable to take my mum to her hospital appointments (she is disabled now) and will go to prison. The policeman at the scene said he will leave it to the insurance company to sort out. But he does want a statement from everyone because this policewoman told them it was my dad's fault even though the care was definitely going too fast. Also, it is highly unlikely that she saw the other car from where she was because she was behind and her vision was obscured.

OP posts:

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Daughter96 · 19/04/2017 14:24

Sorry forgot to add just looking for people opinions as i think it might calm my dad down.

OP posts:

hellsbellsmelons · 19/04/2017 14:29

It's a minor car accident.
Why on earth would your dad think he would go to prison for that?
It's an insurance thing to be left up to them.
Unless they can prove he was driving with undue care and attention or whilst under the influence he will NOT lose his license.
Honestly. God love him, but he's really over reacting and nothing will happen to him other than he'll lose his no claims discount.

hellsbellsmelons · 19/04/2017 14:30

Unless of course his NDC was protected in which case he won't lose that either.
I'm assuming he's not had many accidents?

steff13 · 19/04/2017 14:31

Why on earth would he go to prison for a car accident? If your grandfather and your mother are both former police officers, why can't they reassure him? Surely they know more about the regulations than average people.

I'm in the US, but there's no way he would lose his license here for an accident, unless he's had a lot of prior accidents, or he was drunk.

Itsallaswizz · 19/04/2017 14:35

Your poor Dad! I thought traffic already on a roundabout had right of way? All drivers should slow down/stop and approach with caution if visability is poor. Hope it gets resolved soon. I would agree that the worst case scenario for your Dad from what you've said is that he loses his no claims.

Gooseygoosey12345 · 19/04/2017 14:35

Literally nothing will happen. The insurance will ask what happened, a claim will be made. That'll be the end of it. Worst case scenario his insurance premium will go up. He was drunk etc. tell him not to worry and these things happen. That's what insurance is for

Itsallaswizz · 19/04/2017 14:36

Has your dad spoken to his insurance company? They'll explain to him what will happen, the procedure etc, and this might serve to reassure him?

fuffapster · 19/04/2017 14:36

Hi, sorry to hear of the accident.

Agree with others above about the lack of possibility about going to prison or losing licence (assuming no long history of prior offences).

Also, it seems to me that when you are on a roundabout you have priority - wouldn't that automatically mean the other driver was at fault?

www.highwaycodeuk.co.uk/changes-and-answers/-highway-code-for-roundabouts

Is it possible that your father is suffering from shock? It sounds like it was a big accident, though luckily everyone was OK it seems.

FlyingElbows · 19/04/2017 14:37

He's not going to prison, that's just ridiculous. Surely if he was already on the roundabout then the other driver is unquestionably at fault? Anyway, that what we pay the insurance for just let them deal with it.

Thinkingblonde · 19/04/2017 14:39

Your dad won't go to prison. From the description it's hard to tell who was at fault. The insurers of both drivers will ascertain who was at fault from the markings in the road, witness statements and the camera evidence.
The woman witness shouldn't have approached any other witnesses. What proof is there that she was an off duty police officer? She could have been lying.
Let the insurers sort it out. Your dad can still drive your mum to her appointments.
I very much doubt he'll lose his licence over this.

Allthebestnamesareused · 19/04/2017 14:39

From your description your father pulled out on to a mini-roundabout when there was already a car on the roundabout (no matter what speed). In terms of "fault" it would be his. Thus that is why the other witness would say it was your Dad's fault.

However, the driver only has a dislocated shoulder. the police have already said that they are leaving it to the insurance companies to sort.

It would therefore seem unlikely that they are intending to prosecute him (even for a more minor offence such as driving without due care and attention).

As an ex police officer presumably deep down he knows this but is just still in shock from the accident.

fuffapster · 19/04/2017 14:40

OK sorry you already said he was in shock.

But it sounds to me that he is not fully recovered from that.

Maybe ask the police/insurance/doctor about access to some kind of counselling? Victim support?

Floralnomad · 19/04/2017 14:41

Has your dad got form for over reacting , just be grateful nobody was more seriously hurt and let the insurance company deal with it . If your mum feels the policewoman was being inappropriate perhaps she should complain about her officially .

FanaticalFox · 19/04/2017 14:42

It will just go through the insurance there will be no police involvement, possibly a compensation claim from the other man but thats it. As an ex copper he should know this. Sounds like he just needs to get it sorted via the insurance and put it out of his mind.

neonrainbow · 19/04/2017 14:42

The other car didn't come out of nowhere. Your dad didn't look properly.

Coloursthatweremyjoy · 19/04/2017 14:43

Surely he'd lose his no claims bonus not go to prison. Unless he was drunk, but you'd know about that by now. If you have evidence from a dash cam use it. It doesn't matter whether the witness says it was your dad's fault or not, what did the camera record.

Daughter96 · 19/04/2017 14:44

Dad was definitely not over the limit, he had a blood test and the hospital along with the other driver I think. He had no alcohol in his systme
Unfortunately, my dad suffers from anxiety -Undiagnosed and he worries over everything. Keeps reading things on the internet saying he will get nine points. It was not helped by the fact that the off duty policewomen was being obnoxious at the scene because my grandad refused to give her the camera and kept hovering over the other driver saying it was my dads fault. But she disappeared as soon as the on duty policeman arrived.
Both my mum and grandad were officers years ago and don't know the current legislation but both believe it was a minor accident with a 50/50 fault that could have happened to anyone.

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WateryTart · 19/04/2017 14:47

I would complain about the policewoman. I hope you have the names of witnesses because she could be in deep shit. And deserves to be.

Coloursthatweremyjoy · 19/04/2017 14:49

I'd be willing to bet that Mrs off duty policewoman was nothing of the sort. Your grandad was absolutely correct not to give her the camera. Weird she should disappear when her so called colleague arrived!

Make sure the insurers get the camera footage....that's what your dad paid all that money for isn't It?

Daughter96 · 19/04/2017 14:49

As for the camera, we don't know what was recorded as the police took it and have not reviewed it yet, it has been two weeks.
However the camera was pointed through the windscreen, and as the accident happened on the side it didn't record the actual accident but would have recorded my dad's driving and should determine he was driving carefully. As they are saying that he didn't stop at the end of the junction we are hoping that the carmra recording him doing that

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10storeylovesong · 19/04/2017 14:50

Police officer here... difficult to tell from description but it sounds very much like your dad was at fault and has pulled out onto the roundabout without checking properly. However, I can't imagine it will go any further than a standard RTC report and then left to insurance - as the officer at scene stated. I don't understand why your grandad would have given the camera to the woman behind the car involved - regardless of whether she was an off duty officer or a witness - when there were on duty officers in attendance. I also doubt whether that's the reason you don't have many witnesses - unfortunately people just don't want to get involved and it's extremely rare for people to stop and give details.

I really don't understand why you need to post on a anonymous forum for answers when you have so many police officers in the family though...

10storeylovesong · 19/04/2017 14:52

X post - just read your updates. If your dad has been hit on the side, I would strongly suggest he's pulled out on the other driver - I've attended enough RTCS! In that case, he's at fault as he should have stopped to give way to the right.

RhodaBorrocks · 19/04/2017 14:53

How stressful for you all.

For what it's worth, someone hit me in almost exactly the same way a month ago. After submitting photos and camera footage the other driver was found to be at fault, despite them trying to say I had been going too fast and cut them up.

All he can do is submit his evidence. Skid marks on the road, plus impact damage and final resting place of your DF's car will provide clues to the speed the other car was doing.

And I agree that the so called off duty policewoman wasn't particularly professional.

10storeylovesong · 19/04/2017 14:53

And it doesn't matter if he stopped at the junction if he then subsequently pulled out again in front of another car

temporarilyjerry · 19/04/2017 14:54

Do you know for sure that she was a police officer? If so, why would she disappear when the duty policeman arrived?

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