I've been friends with her for 7 years. Our sons started kinder together. We do spend time together without the kids, but mostly see each other because of the kids. I also look after her son a bit on the school holidays, as I work from home. She also has a lot of relationship issues (DH, family and friends), so I listen to her and try to give advice and support where I can.
My friend has a prickly personality. She's very sensitive and has a very strong opinion on what's right and what's not. Sadly, her mother died when she was 8 and she lost her dad in her 20s. She married and had kids later in life (youngest at 40). These kids are her whole existence, and now they're well into primary school, she's the mum that's first to complain to the teacher, contriving friendships for her kids, getting annoyed at other parents when her kids don't get their way. I know she's trying to be the best mum she can because she didn't have her own for long.
My friend thinks she's excluded and badly treated by other school parents (for both her kids' school years), she thinks the teachers don't respect her and take it out on her kids. She thinks her DD is being bullied by kids of parents that don't like her. She hates her in-laws and says they exclude her. She's constantly fighting with her DH. She talks about fractured relationships with work colleagues, and the list goes on.
I invited her family over for dinner on the Easter break. She did several things that really pissed me off, but I didn't let her know. But after a while, she starts on again about how she was excluded from in-law's Easter celebrations because they don't like her, then in the same breath goes on about how she had a huge argument with her neighbours because she didn't like their kids being rude to hers. Then she starts talking about being excluded from a Facebook group. Then she starts to cry.
I feel so sorry for her. She is deeply sensitive but can be difficult to like and I know why she's having all these relationship problems. For example, her DD wanted a girl to come over for a play date. Friend texts other mum, not once or twice to ask, but 18 times over 2 weeks. My friend just can't seem to join the dots.
So, because I seem to understand her, and she has confided some deeply private things with me in the past, do I tell her she's the common denominator in all her relationship problems and why I think that is?
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To tell a friend what her problem is?
57 replies
Sherashed · 18/04/2017 08:31
OP posts:
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