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Why is this woman so obnoxious towards DH?

(120 Posts)
Hoolahoops Mon 17-Apr-17 14:02:31

How does an adult woman in her thirties get to a point where she behaves like this?

When she arrived at our house and DH brought her bags up to her room, rather than saying thankyou, she sarcastically said, "You can't put anything down in this house can you?" When he went to top up her glass at lunch she said, "Its ok I'll let you know if I'm thirsty". When he held the door for her going into a shop she wanted to go in, she said, "Are you going to just stand there like a muppet?" The most embarrassing moment though, was on the same walk when DH had lifted the DC over a gate and helped me over. When he offered her his hand, she said, "I know you think I'm a heffer, but you don't have to make it do f-ing obvious!"


The context to all this is that she came for Easter lunch with no gifts, flowers or wine. She let her 6 year old wander with chocolate hands and face and wipe it all over the sofas. She was using the c and f words as a matter of course during the whole visit.

Finally, when DH offered to take her bags to the car, she said, "My arms won't f-ing fall off you know,"

I will not be asking her here again, but AIBU to wonder how some women can get to the point where they can't even accept basic manners from men and have to make a spectacle of themselves in the process?

StillStayingClassySanDiego Mon 17-Apr-17 14:03:51

Who is this woman and why didn't either of tell her to stop being so bloody rude?

Wando1986 Mon 17-Apr-17 14:04:25

Bit of a dripfeed. Who is she in relation to you all?

AnyFucker Mon 17-Apr-17 14:04:27

Is she a relative ?

And her behaviour was generally awful, not all of it was directed at men/your husband

user1471441839 Mon 17-Apr-17 14:04:34

She sounds draining. Is this your husbands sister ?

tigerdriverII Mon 17-Apr-17 14:05:00

I think it might be helpful to know what her relationship to your DH IS

BoneyBackJefferson Mon 17-Apr-17 14:06:02

Some women are just arseholes.

Billben Mon 17-Apr-17 14:07:05

Sweet Lord, what a joy she must be to live with.

Rainydayspending Mon 17-Apr-17 14:07:47

That sounds as though she's projecting a lot of issues. Who is she? I am guessing a relative of DH?

MerryInthechelseahotel Mon 17-Apr-17 14:07:51

Did she come to stay or just for lunch?

Religionorno Mon 17-Apr-17 14:07:56

Did you not pick her up on the swearing/rudeness/allowing her DC to wreck your furniture? Because I would have done al three pretty quick.

Bluntness100 Mon 17-Apr-17 14:07:57

Who is she op and what's the back story on their relationship?

MerryInthechelseahotel Mon 17-Apr-17 14:09:49

Maybe she didn't like him fussing over her?

StillStayingClassySanDiego Mon 17-Apr-17 14:10:21

I'm guessing it's his sister.

doughnutcraver Mon 17-Apr-17 14:10:42

Is this a ex partner/wife??

MadamePomfrey Mon 17-Apr-17 14:10:46

What is the relationship?? I'm struggling to understand why you let all this go on without saying something to her? In my opinion 'how some women can get to the point where they can't even accept basic manners from men and have to make a spectacle of themselves in the process?'. Is because no one stands up to them and says your being out of order.

Hoolahoops Mon 17-Apr-17 14:11:38

Sorry, she is s friend from a course I did years ago. We were out of touch for years as I felt we had little in common tbh. She lives up North. She is going through a separation and had been on a spa day in London on Saturday and wanted to extend her visit (not pay for a hotel probably).

Purplepeonies Mon 17-Apr-17 14:11:45

Bloody hell she sounds awful. Who is she in relation to your DH?

PanGalaticGargleBlaster Mon 17-Apr-17 14:13:18

If I was your DH I would be dumping her bags in the street and telling her to piss off. Do you usually let people treat your husband like shit without any intervention on your part?

StillStayingClassySanDiego Mon 17-Apr-17 14:13:34


That's awful, did you tell her how fucking rude she was?

KoalaDownUnder Mon 17-Apr-17 14:13:36

I don't understand why you can't just say who she is? confused

I mean, obviously she's rude, though.

FiveShelties Mon 17-Apr-17 14:13:50

I wonder why both of you would allow 'this woman' to remain in your home. She obviously has no respect for either of you so why not show her the door?

Hoolahoops Mon 17-Apr-17 14:14:21

I did wipe her DDs hands and face several times, but wouldn't most mothers do this themselves?

BoneyBackJefferson Mon 17-Apr-17 14:16:41


There wasn't someone called Laura who invited their bf down to the hen night as well?

Xcrispypancakesx Mon 17-Apr-17 14:17:57

If it's a family member, is this perhaps how the family just communicate with each other. I'm northern ? so perhaps more direct than others, but some of this stuff would pass for flirtation up here.

The kid smearing chocolate around is ignorant, but the rest ?

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