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to cringe at someone calling my dd "princess"

(101 Posts)
WrongSortOfKnife Sun 16-Apr-17 23:06:54

Father of one of my son's classmates, who we see in passing at various pickups and school-related social stuff, loudly addresses my 6yo girl as "princess" at every occasion. I'm absolutely sure he's being friendly and jocular. I find it patronising and essentially misogynistic. I think she finds it a bit uncomfortable but doesn't know why. Would it be possible to say something without giving offense, or do we just smile politely and carry on? (We are all British, after all.)

WorraLiberty Sun 16-Apr-17 23:11:24

Princess, honey, flower, sugar, treacle.

These ^^ are all names my elderly neighbour calls me and all it does is leave me a little bemused grin

I suppose if you really have a problem you should say something.

It wouldn't bother me but different strokes and all that.

RaymondinaReddington Sun 16-Apr-17 23:14:17

Sheesh. He's being nice - in his own way. Don't say anything. It's a bonkers thing to be offended by.

MarcelineTheVampire Sun 16-Apr-17 23:14:36

It really irks me when people call my DD princess and I think it stems from me thinking its misogynistic.

However, I never say anything as people do not mean any harm and it's not every time but if my DD started finding it uncomfortable when older I would absolutely say something.

PaulAnkaTheDog Sun 16-Apr-17 23:18:29

Jeezo... Prince, chap, lad, boyo, wee man. All names people use for boys. It's normal. Stop the nonsense.

shirleycartersaidso Sun 16-Apr-17 23:20:25

I think you're overthinking it.

Waddlelikeapenguin Sun 16-Apr-17 23:20:37

HE can't remember her name. But yes princess grates on me too, my PIL use it with my DDs occasionally angry

AssassinatedBeauty Sun 16-Apr-17 23:21:32

YANBU to internally cringe. It's not a way I'd address children. I wouldn't say anything though unless your DD really hates it herself.

Astro55 Sun 16-Apr-17 23:22:09

My DD gets called princess as well - it's horrible

Indont mind other things - Love flower petal chick etc

Princess is just Yuck!

Teabagtits Sun 16-Apr-17 23:30:29

I'm sure it's meant as a term of endearment rather than a means of misogynistic oppression.

My dd likes to point out Leia Organa is/was a kickass princess and tells anyone who calls her princess that's who she wants to be like, she did the same with the girl from Brave too. It's the start of her rejecting the princess label for herself by searching for strong female (princess) characters giving her the best of both worlds.

ThreeFish Sun 16-Apr-17 23:41:10

I bet he cant remember her name!

LouisevilleLlama Sun 16-Apr-17 23:43:32

My DD gets called princess as well - it's horrible

Indont mind other things - Love flower petal chick etc

I think it's just personal preference to me I think Love, flower petal and especially chick is weird and irks me as I just hate them

AnnieAnoniMouse Sun 16-Apr-17 23:45:51

Seriously hmm.

Get over it.

NoWordForFluffy Sun 16-Apr-17 23:46:42

My DD won't respond if someone calls her that...she's them that she's called [her name]! We think it's amusing that she doesn't identify with being a princess. 😁

LouisevilleLlama Sun 16-Apr-17 23:46:55

*My DD gets called princess as well - it's horrible

Indont mind other things - Love flower petal chick etc *

I think it's just personal preference to me I think Love, flower petal and especially chick is weird and irks me as I just hate them

GabsAlot Sun 16-Apr-17 23:47:53

bet you hate den watts then!

ginswinger Sun 16-Apr-17 23:49:53

But he's not saying it for your benefit, it's hers. I think it's nice!

WorraLiberty Sun 16-Apr-17 23:51:20

I don't really care what anyone calls me or my kids, as long as it's a term of endearment that comes from a good place.

When my eldest DS was 4, the elderly lady next door used to call him 'her little lamb' grin

He used to squirm with embarrassment but eventually got used to it.

Now he's 25, he looks back fondly and laughs at how he used to cringe.

Batghee Sun 16-Apr-17 23:52:21

whats actually wrong with the word 'princess'? IMO its more misogynistic that people think it couldnt be high praise. Maybe your little princess is fantastically clever and brave. People have a negative idea of what it means to be a princess or a fairy or any thing that is traditionally associated with young girls...... mostly just because they are things associated with young girls. And why should things associated with young girls always be insults?

Bejazzled Sun 16-Apr-17 23:52:29

"Doesn't identify with being a princess"

<dies a little>

Batghee Sun 16-Apr-17 23:56:49

when you call someone your prince or your princess it basically is just a way of saying they are special to you. The monarchy is the symbolic head of the country so by calling someone prince or princess you are saying that to you they are the most important person. For an older person you might say king or queen.
Its really not an insult. The only reason people think it is is because of disney princesses or fairy tale princesses etc and people always associating them with little girls and people thinking little girls are stupid and that to be like a little girl is stupid.

WorraLiberty Sun 16-Apr-17 23:57:32

If the OP started a thread saying she wants everyone to call her son by his nickname - 'Princess'

I'm sure some people would be queuing up to say 'YANBU'.

grin

Birdsgottaf1y Sun 16-Apr-17 23:57:43

It is said because the person saying it can't remember names,or never knew them, such as Market stall workers.

i also think,Den Watts and Pete Beale.

I think that we should reclaim this stuff. There's a lot of female history that's been ignored, I've been reminded of that since watching the program tonight on Shakespeare's Mother and one on Henry the eight's Wives.

There were Princesses (or equivalent) long before there was Disney.

AssassinatedBeauty Sun 16-Apr-17 23:59:43

Do people generally say "hello prince" to young boys that they like and/or can't remember the name of? I don't think I've ever heard a boy being called prince.

babyinarms Mon 17-Apr-17 00:00:25

Wouldn't bother me .

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