A friend (Laura) was invited to a mutual friends (Sarah's) hen do. The hen do was in London (about a 2hr drive from where we all live). It happened to be Laura's 3 year anniversary of when she met her partner. Not an actual anniversary, as in from when the started dating - just from when the met, they didn't start dating for about another year.
The hen do was booked and Laura said she would go, it was a spa day, then a meal followed by a cocktail event and then into town for some more drinks. They started booking hotels and deciding who was sharing rooms etc when Laura decided that because it was her anniversary she was going to bring her partner. Originally Laura, her partner and one of the hens would share a room, needless to say no one wanted to share with Laura and her partner. Can you blame them? Laura eventually got a room on her own with her partner, which meant one of the hens was on her own (it was a group of 20 - so should have been 2 to a room.
) Sarah is understandably fuming that Laura's partner came. Laura doesn't see an issue in it. Laura and her partner planned to go out for a meal the following day and have a day in London. In her mind she's paying for a room so she may as well 'enjoy her time away'
What makes it worse is after the cocktails Laura claims she felt ill and said to the girls she would grab a bite to eat and meet them later. Instead of catching up with everyone she went back to the hotel. She said she messaged sarah to say she wasn't coming back out. Sarah says she didnt get the message.
Laura is meant to be bridesmaid but sarah doesn't really want her too anymore, as she feels Laura was more concerned with spending time with the partner than celebrating the hen do. The whole weekend was planned to include as many family as humanly possible, so the under 18's and those that didn't want to go out for drinks joined in with the spa day and evening meal, and then the rest went drinking. So I think it was about 30 all together and 20 that stayed the night. Laura is meant to be Sarah's maid of honour. They have known each other for years.
I'm in the middle, I'm friends with both girls (couldn't make the hen do).
Basically who is being unreasonable?, Laura for inviting her bf and then ignoring the majority of the group (she didn't travel down with them, and didn't join them on either morning, despite saying she would. They had planned for a spa day on the Saturday morning and then everything else in the evening. They then met back up on the Sunday and travelled back together (apart from Laura), or is sarah unreasonable for expecting Laura to join in with things.
This all happened a few weeks ago, and the atmosphere between the 2 is glacial. Sarah has gone dress shopping with another friends and is no longer making any effort with Laura. Laura is saying that she did nothing wrong.
Apologies this is incredibly long
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Who's being unreasonable?
89 replies
user57289 · 16/04/2017 19:40
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