WIBU to take DS to out of hours this morning?(16 Posts)
I need some perspective here to see if I overreacted or if my DH is being a dickhead.
DS is 17 months old. Last weekend he got a small insect bite on his ankle. It was okay for a few days but then on Wednesday nursery put a plaster over the bite because they said he'd been scratching at it and it had gone red. We kept a plaster on it after that, changing it each evening after his bath. It was still red but it didn't seem to be getting worse.
Yesterday evening DS threw up (not that unusual for him) and while I was cleaning him up I took off the plaster and was shocked by how much worse the bite looked. It was red and raw with a little bit of yellow pus and about the size of a 20p piece. There were no track marks leading from it or anything like that to indicate blood poisoning.
DH went to the nearest pharmacy to get some antiseptic cream and while he was gone I phoned 111. DH thought I was overreacting because DS was otherwise fine - no temperature, he was in a good mood, eating and drinking fine etc. - and that we should leave it until Tuesday and take him to the GP then if it wasn't any better. I ignored him and got on with it. Anyway, 111 led to a call from our local out of hours service who asked me to take him to the ooh clinic. They originally said I could take him that evening however I can't drive and DH refused to take us because he thought the whole thing was ridiculous. The clinic isn't easy to get to on public transport and DS was ready for bed by this time so I made an appointment to take him this morning.
I hoped DH would have mellowed a bit overnight but he had the same attitude this morning so I had to take DS in a taxi.
Now I am an anxious person. My mind always goes to the worst case scenario. DH said that taking DS to the clinic was indulging my anxiety and he didn't want to do that.
So I took DS alone. The practitioner who saw him said I'd definitely done the right thing by bringing him in today rather than waiting because at the moment the infection is localised but it could have turned really nasty by Tuesday. She's given him a prescription for antibiotics for a week. I called DH to tell him and he was still really hostile and dismissive.
Being Easter Sunday there is only one pharmacy open and it didn't open until 11 so I had to hang around in the hospital for an hour. I called DH again before I called for a taxi and asked him to come and get us. He did so and we're now driving home.
I phoned my mum while I was waiting at the hospital and she's absolutely livid with DH but... she's my mum, of course she's going to be on my side. So I turn to the harsher environment of AIBU... was I BU to take DS today?
So I took DS alone. The practitioner who saw him said I'd definitely done the right thing by bringing him in today rather than waiting because at the moment the infection is localised but it could have turned really nasty by Tuesday
is all the answer you need really
You did the right thing taking him. Can't believe your dh was such an arse. Mothers instinct is always right.
Your DH is an arsehole! Refusing to take you is ridiculous!
Your dh sounds like a wanker tbh. Terrible that he wouldn't drive you there.
Your husband is a dick. I'm glad you still took him and got him seen to!
Umm, no. DNU. You phoned 111 for non urgent medical advice, which is exactly what it's for, and then followed that advice. What would be U would be getting professional medical advice and ignoring it because you think you know better.
Unleash the wrath of his MIL - he deserves it! (only joking!)
You followed medical advice to get him checked out. It turns out he had an infection that would have been worse by Tuesday.
How can you have made the wrong decision. Your son is being treated.
Your DH should feel very ashamed.
For them to give antibiotics indicates that he DID need to be seen today next time your DH tries to tell you when to seek medical advice ask him where he did his training he's being a prick, you did the right thing!
Sorry, you're DH was a twat.
My partner thinks I'm a little silly with my worries with our son, but he knows it come from a good place and even it is wasn't serious, would help me find the best care for our son, be it a trip to the the drs or the pharmacy. And if it turned out to be nothing - great, but he will support me as he knows it's only a mother trying her best.
Well done you for ignoring your dick of a DH and getting your little DS treated. I'd be furious.
In this instance you were absolutely right to call 111, follow the advice and take him. The practitioner said so.
However... it's really hard to live with someone who has serious anxiety and (rightly or wrongly) it can make you less tolerant of every single worry. 111 is also notorious for arse covering and sending you to out of hours because of a box ticking system.
Not knowing either of you or your history, could he be a bit exasperated in a 'cry wolf' sort of way? Could he have been trying to help reduce your anxiety by sticking to the original plan of waiting until Tuesday?
He got it wrong this time but I wouldn't jump straight to the arsehole judgement without knowing more.
You did the right thing seeking medical advice. Is your H normally like this?
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