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To think that FIL could have postponed his visit?

(21 Posts)
caitlinohara Fri 14-Apr-17 19:28:06

I probably am BU. But FIL has arrived today to spend the Easter weekend with us. Having sat down to dinner he was very quiet and dh asks him if he is ok. He says he spent the early hours of this morning with D & V. AIBU to think that you don't then go and drive for 5 hours to stay in someone else's house where there are children? I'm not being mega precious about the kids, but ds1 (10) is off on a 4 day residential with school on Tuesday that he has been looking forward to since September, so it would be pretty disastrous if he fell ill. Ds3 has had a shaky few months having been in hospital with suspected asthma and a series of chest infections. Ds2 is like an ox, but even so.

I am doing my best to be sympathetic but I am really pissed off at his thoughtlessness. AIBU?

Motherwithflaws Fri 14-Apr-17 19:29:11

I'd go bonkers!

Motherwithflaws Fri 14-Apr-17 19:29:31


AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered Fri 14-Apr-17 19:31:04

YANBU, your FIL is a selfish tosser! shock

AnnieAnoniMouse Fri 14-Apr-17 19:32:13

Inconsiderate twat. I'd be furious...

Let's hope it was something he ate & not a bug.

user1471558436 Fri 14-Apr-17 19:34:05

Selfish fil

caitlinohara Fri 14-Apr-17 19:34:27

Annie that's what's worrying me, I've a feeling I heard somewhere that these things are almost always bugs rather than food poisoning.

What do we do now? We can't ask him to leave can we?

caitlinohara Fri 14-Apr-17 19:37:12

Slightly heartened that it's not just me.

AnnieAnoniMouse Fri 14-Apr-17 19:44:41

It depends on his constitution. A couple of weeks ago we made lattes, I took a mouthful & felt it wasn't 'right'. I checked and the milk was in date, but I threw mine away. Himself didn't & drank the whole mug. I woke up in the night and spent the night ill. Himself didn't It was definitely that as everything else I'd had was bland & biting fine. Toast, crackers, banana etc. Also, if it was only 'this morning' it might just have been an upset tummy, Bugs tend to last longer.

You could ask him to leave, but as he's already been there a while, it's probably a bit late to do much good. Although if he lived closer I would.

Gahhhhhh. Why are people so STUPID?

caitlinohara Fri 14-Apr-17 19:50:22

He was here for 3 hrs before he mentioned it! He has gone to bed now. If it was me I would have waited 24 hours at least, I just don't get it. I am now going to have to spend the rest of the weekend hassling the kids to wash their hands every 10 mins and I am currently Zoflora-ing all the doorknobs.

JaneEyre70 Fri 14-Apr-17 19:51:03

What a stupid thoughtless thing to have done. I'd not be impressed at all but no good getting him to leave, you may already be infected. Fingers crossed it was something he ate and I'd make a point of telling him that you wish he'd told you before he came. To be honest, if he'd had norovirus there's no way he'd have been able to drive for 5 minutes let alone 5 hours.........

Whereismumhiding2 Fri 14-Apr-17 19:56:54


You don't bring a bug to someone elses house! I hope you pull him up on it. Appalling manners. "Keep a d&v bug to yourself next time! Dont visit others people's houses til you are well . It could ruin DC's trip!" Buy more dettoll!!!

caitlinohara Fri 14-Apr-17 19:57:32

Jane that's true, I've had noro and couldn't have driven to the end of the road never mind all the way down the M6 and M5. I said "you shouldn't have come if you weren't well" but he just said "Well, I'm here now" so he obviously took it the wrong way!

Littlecaf Fri 14-Apr-17 19:58:36

That's a bit thoughtless of him. Maybe he didn't think it through?

Laurapalmer90 Fri 14-Apr-17 19:59:01

YANBU at all. That is a really thoughtless thing to do.

SnugglyBedSocks Fri 14-Apr-17 20:05:03

Has he been unwell at yours since arriving?

SnugglyBedSocks Fri 14-Apr-17 20:05:13

Has he been unwell at yours since arriving?

caitlinohara Fri 14-Apr-17 20:06:06

No vomiting but has been to the loo a lot. Luckily our spare room is downstairs so he can have the downstairs toilet to himself.

Trifleorbust Fri 14-Apr-17 20:20:39

It is thoughtless, but I do think MN is a bit of a weird place when it comes to talking about bugs. Most of my family just say they have a bit of a dicky tummy. They wash their hands after the toilet and it doesn't spread like bubonic plague or anything. The honest-to-god chances of him passing it on must be low.

Bestthingever Fri 14-Apr-17 23:48:53

He is being inconsiderate but is it possible he is just lonely and was really looking forward to seeing you all? My dps have just left and dm wasn't really well enough to visit (undergoing chemotherapy) but they were desperate to see a big football match of ds. Dm of course ended up being unable to go and she spent most of her stay lying in her room.

kelpeed Sat 15-Apr-17 00:53:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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