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AIBU?

To ask if you mind being called "Man"?

130 replies

ohnothisisme · 14/04/2017 15:16

If you're a woman, do you mind being called "Mate" or "Man", "Dude" etc.? As in "Yeah man/dude, go for it".

There's a youngish guy in my office who frequently addresses the women (including me) like this, and I don't know why exactly but I really dislike it.

AIBU? Blush

OP posts:
SorryForCallingYourMumACunt · 14/04/2017 15:17

No I absolutely hate it.

Scrubba · 14/04/2017 15:19

I'd hate it because it's incredibly childish and not acceptable for anyone over 17.

DorisMcSweeney · 14/04/2017 15:19

Although probably better than calling your mummy a cunt.

Teabagtits · 14/04/2017 15:21

I really don't care. If it's not an expletive then I think I'm winning

ZilphasHatpin · 14/04/2017 15:21

It never happens to me! Mate does, but only from one close friend (also female).

NotReallyMeToday · 14/04/2017 15:22

I don't care.

KoalaDownUnder · 14/04/2017 15:23

I hate it. I had a mechanic who looked about twelve 18 refer to me as 'mate' last time I took my car in. I'm a 43-year-old female customer, in what universe am I your 'mate'?! Hmm

pipsqueak25 · 14/04/2017 15:23

apart from dh / dm, call me by my name or the short form or just don't speak to me, dc obviously is 'mum'

BackforGood · 14/04/2017 15:23

Can't say I find it upsetting in anyway - not that it happens a lot.
He's probably read too many MN threads about people being offended by any other title. Wink

SoloDance · 14/04/2017 15:23

I don't care either.

BounceBounceSplishSplash · 14/04/2017 15:27

It wouldn't offend me but I'd probably think whoever said it was a bit of a twat for using such a phrase unless they were 15. Though I think it would be too cringe-worthy for the majority of 15yr olds to even say.

HappyLabrador · 14/04/2017 15:29

Couldn't care less. It's preferable to 'love' or 'dear', now that I do hate, it makes me feel old! (I'm 38).

My dd and her (female) friend call each other mate or dude. They're 16.

wittyUserNameHere · 14/04/2017 15:54

He's probably read too many MN threads about people being offended by any other title.

Smile

It does sound like Ms. Sourface would be more appropriate OP.

What should he call you, assuming he doesn't care enough to memorise you name.

SaskiaRembrandtWasFramed · 14/04/2017 15:58

Another one who doesn't care here.

Asmoto · 14/04/2017 15:58

I don't mind being called 'man' or 'dude' in a social setting. Being referred to in a group as 'you guys' at work annoys me though - it doesn't offend me, it just irritates me.

Meekonsandwich · 14/04/2017 15:58

Why get offended at mate???! It means friend???
I can't say I care, dude, man, guys, however "girl" really annoys me.

I am not a girl, I've been a legal adult for 9 years now, I am not a "good girl" at all.
Grown woman. "Bye girls!"
It's always bloody builders in our shop. And I am the youngest woman there, so none of us qualify as girls.
They'd be weirded out if I said "bye boys!" Or "good boy!"
Ita just another way to make us feel smaller than we are.

HistoricalAccount · 14/04/2017 15:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PolterGoose · 14/04/2017 16:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LadyPW · 14/04/2017 16:00

Doesn't bother me - they're trying to be friendly. They can call me love too if they want. Better some friendliness than being offensive.

NotYoda · 14/04/2017 16:00

It's twatty. I'm a middle aged woman and it's happened twice recently. I got called 'fam' by some little scrote who was trying to intimidate me a few weeks ago. I did say something about that.

I don't mind love.

NoelHeadbands · 14/04/2017 16:00

Doesn't bother me at all, it makes me think of Kevin Whateley in Auf Wiedersehen Pet

"Brenda man"

Revenant · 14/04/2017 16:01

I don't care about being called man or dude. But there was a man at the corner shop who used to call me sir every time I went in. It disturbed me somewhat as I look not at all like a sir.

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NotYoda · 14/04/2017 16:02

Also 'guys' is just a bit 'I'm a drama student who is currently working as a chugger and thinks this is the way to get on people's good sides'

Gatekeeper · 14/04/2017 16:03

I say man a fair bit but that's because I'm from Durham "give owa man" etc . I dont actually call someone a man IYKWIM. Bloody hate being called guy or guys though

HunterHearstHelmsley · 14/04/2017 16:03

I always say guys. I hate mate though.

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