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AIBU?

To think 12A films are not the place for uncontrolled 4 year olds?

21 replies

Rockhopper81 · 10/04/2017 17:00

We took my nephews to see Power Rangers at the cinema this afternoon - they're 12, 11 and 9. The film is a 12A, so obviously the 11 and 9 year olds would've had to be accompanied anyway. But they're all big 'hero movie' fans and we knew they'd be fine with it.

A lady with two children - aged about 4 and 8 - came in (15 mins after the film had started, but that's their choice). The 4 year old then spent an hour talking to her mum at varying volumes and walking up and down the row they were in (in front of us) with their booster seat. Obviously when mum occasionally tried to quiet her or get her to sit down, this then raises the volume again.

I totally understand what a 12A certificate means and respect anybody's right to decide what is appropriate for their child, but am I unreasonable in thinking if you take a young child to a 12A film you shouldn't expect them to walk around talking?

Or am I totally unreasonable and need to get a bit more of a grip??

OP posts:

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GeillisTheWitch · 10/04/2017 17:06

YANBU. In fact I would say you shouldn't behave like that whatever the film rating is. When we went to see Beauty and the Beast there was a family next to us with two older girls of around 9/10 years and a toddler, they all talked constantly at normal speaking volume with no consideration for anyone else. Fuckers .

Bantanddec · 10/04/2017 17:10

It's bloody rude of her not to remove him when disrupting the viewing for other people! I managed to get free tickets for another showing when a similar thing happened to me.

meditrina · 10/04/2017 17:13

YANBU

Not because of the certificate of the film btw.

But because there is a basic level of maturity needed to be ready to sit and follow a film. And not all DC have attained it by age 4 (indeed my guess is that the majority have not). And until they have it is simply not fair in them to be put into circumstances they are not able to cope with. And definitely unfair for all the other (paying) viewers.

Theresnonamesleft · 10/04/2017 17:20

i cannot abide this. You should have spoken to the staff. I've had shouty man removed and children who decided to run around, shout and chuck popcorn around. I'm not paying £13+ for a ticket to listen to other people.

Rockhopper81 · 10/04/2017 17:25

I did speak to the supervisor on the way out - pointed out that whilst I had a 'season ticket' for the cinema, we'd paid for the boys tickets as a holiday treat. They didn't offer any sort of compensation and I'm really not assertive enough to push it (the fact I mentioned it at all is a minor miracle - it's not in me as a rule).

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LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 10/04/2017 18:22

I'm usually fairly intolerant of small children being disruptive but when I went to see Beauty and the Beast it was the bloody woman across the aisle who kept lighting her phone up that was giving me the rage!

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 10/04/2017 18:23

Having worked in a cinema, it's no good mentioning it on the way out, they will think you are just trying it on after watching the whole film

Theresnonamesleft · 10/04/2017 19:16

I agree there's no point saying a thing afterwards. What do you want the staff to do then? If they are told during the disruption then they will be able to deal with it.

Rockhopper81 · 10/04/2017 19:44

I agree that it would've been better to mention something during the film, but selfishly I didn't want to miss a film I had paid to see. I did think about going out, but it took me the whole film to build up to saying anything - see above, I'm just not comfortable with complaining - but I should've said something during the film really.

The supervisor did say that staff check each film at least 3 times and they would look into what had happened with that - we didn't see anyone come in like we normally would.

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Rockhopper81 · 10/04/2017 19:45

Also, the supervisor made it abundantly clear that it's up to parents to decide if a 12A film is suitable for their under-12 - would they actually be able to say anything to the parent in this situation?

That's a genuine question, incidentally - I'm not being argumentative or anything!

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CottonSock · 10/04/2017 19:50

I regularly go to family showings with my 3 yo and baby..both watch the film and stay put in seats/ on lap. Yanbu

Allthebestnamesareused · 10/04/2017 20:26

Rockhopper- it is the disruption that is the problem. So if the person being disruptive is 4 , 14 or 40 they should be asked to leave. I'd have gone and found staff at the time if the parent hadn't controlled their child.

Rockhopper81 · 10/04/2017 21:01

Allthebestnamesareused - I shall be sure to find somebody at the time if this happens again, thanks for that.

CottonSock - I think this was part of my wondering if I was being unreasonable, I've taken my 3 year old nephew several times to the cinema (first time when he was just under 2.5yrs) and he's been fine, stayed put in his seat/on lap. Even towards the end of the film the first time he went, when he got a bit fidgety, he just sat on the step instead and was happy with it. I wondered if we'd just got lucky with him or not!

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LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 10/04/2017 21:06

Not a problem with the ages but the disruption should have been mentioned. It couldn't have been that bad if you preferred to stay and watch the film than go out and mention it to a member of staff!

If you sit through an entire film and then complain, you won't get anywheee

lalaloopyhead · 10/04/2017 21:13

YANBU. I went to the cinema for the first time in ages today and was delighted to find that it was almost empty and that there is now an annoucement at the beginning about not using phones because it is distracting to others. The last time I went there was a family of four with 2 kids too young to be interested in the film, who walked up and down, climbed on the chairs and talked non stop while both parents illuminated the place with their mobile phones while they text and browsed facebook - seriously what is the point!?

Rockhopper81 · 10/04/2017 23:58

I don't understand using your 'phone whilst in the cinema either - someone sitting in the next seat to my mum at a showing did that, my mum just pointedly put her hand up to block the light from in, coupled with a stern look. They didn't do it again.

"It couldn't have been that bad" is a relative statement - nobody was going to die from it, no, but wanting to watch the film I'd paid to see isn't exactly surprising either. I would definitely go and find someone if/when it happens again though.

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LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 11/04/2017 09:10

I meant that in the context of you expressing surprise that no compensation was offered - it's like going into a restaurant and eating a whole meal then complaining because the food was rubbish, iyswim.

SomewhatIdiosyncratic · 11/04/2017 09:22

A 12A even if featuring children's characters like Power Rangers is unlikely to hold the attention of children as young as 4. If it was suitable for younger children, it would have a U or more likely a PG rating (given the action nature of Power Rangers)

The right 4 year old in the right film may well be attentive and unobtrusive. I was lucky with DS1 who's always been fine. I'm more cautious about DS2's attention span.

Letting a child of any age disturb other people is completely unreasonable. Particularly as the cinema is so expensive these days.

Summerisdone · 11/04/2017 09:41

YANBU, no matter what rating the film the mother shouldn't have allowed her child to carry on in that way. I've recently began taking my 2 year old cinema but I'm aware that his young age could mean he gets restless and bored, and therefore becomes noisy and disruptive. Because of this I always sit right at the front so that I'm able to make a quit exit to remain as disruptive less as possible if he starts.
Luckily I've not had a problem yet, but we have only been 3 times so far.

Kitsandkids · 11/04/2017 10:01

YANBU. Mine are 8 and 9 and I don't take them to see 12a films because a. They're quite sensitive and might be upset at some of the content and b. I don't think they'd be able to follow the plot of a lot of 12a films. I don't think there are many 4 year olds who would properly understand the plot of a 12a - they might enjoy the action but that's not the same as understanding what's going on. So I can't see the point of taking them. And if that means their parents don't get to see the film then tough, it'll be on TV eventually, they'll cope.

I'm a bit grumpy about kids running about at cinemas no matter what the rating is. If they won't sit still for a film then why take them? They're not enjoying it, and their behaviour is ruining it for other people. My two know I won't speak to them while the film is on (unless an emergency) and they go to the toilet just before we go in and can't go again until the film is over!

HalfShellHero · 11/04/2017 10:08

Yeah the walking around is a complete no no , my 4 year old went to see PR and decided he needed the toilet only to undecide..

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