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AIBU to suggest we almost always feel like the grass is greener on the other side.

(4 Posts)
PrimeMinistersQuestionables Mon 10-Apr-17 07:10:46

The title is pretty self explanatory, just wondering if this is more common than I thought, as I was chatting to friends, and one is a SAHM, hates it wants a job. Versus One who is gutted she has to work two jobs to make ends meet and wishes she chose a better career path, juxtaposed with the consultant registrar, who wished she'd chosen a less stressful job, so she could have more sociable hours so she could leave her husband, contrasting with another friend who wishes she wasn't pregnant and about to become a single parent after a one night stand, who is gutted that she doesn't see any of her friends as she really wants to go out more, contrasting again with another one of the group who hardly wants to leave the house or see anyone as her infertility struggle is absolutely destroying her.

Don't get me wrong we aren't all totally miserable all the time, but it's clear that when we see eachother sometimes we are quick to pick and chose the good bits about eachothers lives, and decide that the grass is greener for everyone else?

(This sounds much more toxic than it is, and no one actually thinks anyone in the group actually has it lots better than them, just looking at it with my rational outside looking in hat on, I can see we all have one thing that the other person wants!)

Bearfrills Mon 10-Apr-17 07:38:55

I think it's human nature to wonder what the alternatives would be to your own situation. We all sometimes think "what if...?" and the rise of social media doesn't help because people tend to post the best bits of their lives and leave out the bad so it looks like everyone has a fabulous life while yours is much more normal/mundane in comparison.

I always try to remember two things.

1. The grass is often greener on the other side of the fence because it's fertilised with bullshit


2. Comparison is the thief of joy.

skerrywind Mon 10-Apr-17 07:44:29

No, I don't feel like that.

I love my life. I spent the first part of adulthood having a great career, didn't have kids until I was 38, travelled a huge amount to exotic destinations, lived abroad for a while. Then came motherhood, I ditched my career, became a SAHM, now have my own business working from home.
I don't envy others, I'm exactly where I want to be right now. Lovely home, great partner, fantastic kids. I'm too busy enjoying my own life to care whet other people are up to.

SafeToCross Mon 10-Apr-17 07:55:25

I think sometimes people put their own situation down, so as not to seem smug.

I am risk averse, so I always convince myself the grass is greener my side...

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