To ask for an OT referral for this?

[christmaseveinthesnow]

Hi! Am braving AIBU for this because I really and honestly can't make up my mind if I'm being ridiculously pfb about this or not.
My ds is almost five, the following things are worrying me:
No established hand preference, uses both equally.
Very poor writing/drawing/colouring skills and very reluctant to do any.
Fist pen grip.
Can't do buttons
Still wets himself and nowhere near ready to night train.
Can't sit still, constantly fidgeting and messing with things (stands out amongst peers)

However he
Swims well
Is doing well with school work (that doesn't involve writing)
Can pedal a bike
Very good at climbing/ balancing type playground activities.
Can cross the midline with no hesitation.
Talks very well for his age.
Good behaviour and eager to please.
Very confident generally.
Runs, jumps, hops etc in an age appropriate way.

He was born very prematurely and I'm worried about dyspraxia. I have a doctor's appointment soon to ask to be referred but have had several moments when I think I'm being ridiculous and should cancel.
Help?

[Blanca87]

Yes! My 5 year old demonstrates some of what you describe. I think she has dyspraxia. I've just started the process for referral but because it has come from me rather than the school it seems like a long cumbersome process. Anyway, studies show the sooner there is a diagnosis the better its for the child when they get older, late diagnosis can impact their mental health, self esteem etc...

[christmaseveinthesnow]

Thanks, that's what I'm going on too. I'm guessing that even if the GP agrees to refer him the wait for an OT appointment will be very long.

[ASDismynormality]

Can you afford a private assessment, the NHS wait for OT is very long and children really do benefit from early help. My DS has dyspraxia (among other issues), his school used the recommendations from a private OT and he has improved massively.

[christmaseveinthesnow]

I did contact one who seemed very helpful, wanted about £450 which would be a stretch but yes I could afford it if needed. I just change my mind daily about whether he needs it or not.
I struggled massively throughout my time at school with poor handwriting, poor attention and organisation and don't want him to experience the same unnecessarily, then again I could just be projecting. His dad has no concerns.

[Megatherium]

YANBU. You would regret it in later life if it turns out he does have dyspraxia and you didn't get help early on, and if he doesn't, fine, you know where you are.

[user1491774393]

YANBU, My oldest was the same as that age, assessments took years and he has only just received a diagnosis. OT helped him out so much. I would recommend some fidget toys for the mean time, like a fidget cube, spinners and even blue tack as these are great for building manual dexterity.

[ASDismynormality]

i have discovered that usually if a parent has concerns there is good reason for it. Trust your instinct, if you feel there is a difficulty get it investigated- if he turns out not to have any difficulties great!

[Casschops]

Hi OP I'm Paediatric OT and would recommend you start your referral process asap if you are concerned about your DC. Generally although this depends on area you would need a referral from a GP although I would check. I would say try not to get too concerned at this stage as Mr any children just need some short bursts of therapy to help them to catch up and some children need longer planning either is fine. Have a look at activities on the internet to improve gross motor and fine motor skills to help your DC. It doesn't have to be complicated, be positive and encouraging and incorporate it into play or daily routine with rewards if DC engages. Wishing lists are very long and many OT services are very busy coping with discharge from hospital back to the community so therpeutic input often falls by the wayside for emergencies but you can do so much at home. Encourage school to also follow your lead for consistency. Good luck

[christmaseveinthesnow]

Class that's really helpful, thank you.
Can I ask, as the Internet has conflicting advice on this, since he has no hand preference and swaps hands when writing, should I encourage him to choose and stick with a "writing hand" or leave him alone to develop this naturally?

[Bringbackpublicfloggings]

My ds has dyspraxia and there are all sorts of useful things available to help with fine motor skills, he even has hand exercises to do at home and school which seems to be helping. Definitely see your go for a referral.