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To ask for you to motivate me?

(9 Posts)
WupidStanker Sun 09-Apr-17 19:57:53

Here's my story. Single mother. One child with duchenne MD. No family support. Working PT. The other child with ADHD. About to finish my degree in education, but I have so much to submit in such a short space of time that I feel like I'm drowning, but basically I'm just lazy - I've had sufficient time to complete my work, but every time I'm under pressure I decide to take up a hobby (knitting, crotchet, baking cakes) and then I end up causing myself more pressure and stress by not having the time to complete the work. I somehow managed to pass the first two years with average/good marks, but I'm worried about this year. I have a massive problem with procrastination, and whilst my DC's issues do take up a lot of time, they are both older children in school full time and I DO have plenty of time to finish this, I'm just a lazy bitch. Please give me some harsh words to knock some sense into me, or at least some tips/experiences if you have ever been in the same boat. Merci!

haveacupoftea Sun 09-Apr-17 20:03:49

Don't fall at the last hurdle. You're self sabotaging. Write a list with everything you have to do and when you are going to do it by. Tick it off as you go along. And stop wasting time on stupid fucking hobbies and MN wink

WupidStanker Sun 09-Apr-17 20:11:51

haveacupoftea it's ironic because every time I plan on sitting down to do work, I think 'I'll just have a cup of tea first' and a cup of tea leads to Mumsnetting, Facebook stalking and other pointless activities. I'm a danger to myself honestly.

CaulkheadNorth Sun 09-Apr-17 20:15:28

I often work in public - coffee shops, library etc, and turn the data and wifi off on my phone as i then don't faff on it. Working in public makes me aware of what I'm doing as I don't want other people seeing me just wasting time online and it sets an achievable goal - I can work for the hour I'm drinking coffee. You can do it.

foxyloxy78 Sun 09-Apr-17 21:00:33

Look. How much do you want this? You are doing this for a reason. To make a better life for yourself and kids. Kick it into gear. Make a timetable and stick to it. You need to be driven and you will reach your goal.

KipperandChips Sun 09-Apr-17 22:15:04

Hi there - slightly similar situation - I'm studying for a degree too, working PT and have two children (my four year old has Beckers MD).

You sound just like me. Whenever I have assignments due, instead of getting on with them I start distracting myself with sewing/reading/getting 10,000 steps/etc(!)

Have you spoken to your tutor/university about your situation? They might be able to give you an extension if you're finding it too much? Even a week just to give yourself a bit of breathing space?

I have several assignments due after Easter and have broken them up and given myself mini goals like having to read all sources one day/make an essay plan the next day/Essay 1 needs to be done by Wednesday/etc.

I also find the earlier in the day I start the better, otherwise I get distracted and put it off thinking I'll start tomorrow. I have been known to get up before everyone and study for an hour at 5am. Once I'm over the hurdle of making a start I find it a lot easier to go back later in the day.

Also, I put my phone in a different room when writing essays, deactivate Facebook and switch off the wifi. Sometimes it's the only way(!)

Also, remember, the fact you've got this far through your degree with everything going on shows that you are more than capable of finishing it smile You can do this!

FABpMummy Sun 09-Apr-17 22:32:29

Leave this place at once!

I found leechblocker really helpful I think when I was using Firefox to keep me off mn and fb.

JustSeven Fri 30-Jun-17 00:20:10

Hi, I also have a son with Duchenne, he was 9 a couple of weeks ago. I admin a Facebook support group for parents of children with Duchenne, let me know if you want any details

fizzicles Fri 30-Jun-17 00:26:16

2 things I've found most helpful to get shit done:

Pomodoro technique - essentially, you set a timer for 25 minutes and work until it goes off, take a 5 minute break and repeat. Once you've done 4, you have a longer break.

The other is a simple truth - you don't have to feel like working to actually work. Motivation tips are about getting into the right mood to work, but all you really need to do is get started, whether you feel like it or not. Sounds totally obvious, but was a life-changing revelation for me!

Good luck with it!

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